Though having an unfair advantage at this moment, given the Red Wings lost the first game of their series against Nashville, unlike many in the Detroit area, my prediction was the Predators would ultimately prevail in the series. Watching the first game merely reinforced that notion. The Wings seemingly haven't recovered from their regular season ending swoon, and I don't see them flipping some magical switch to turn it around in the next few games.
Some "locals" have said history is on Detroit's side. After all, that franchise has won a few Stanley Cups in the not so distant past, and Nashville has only won one playoff series in the history of their own franchise. That's all nonsense, of course, because what happened years ago is irrelevant. That was then, and this iis now, and that's all the matters.
If one buys into that logic, then one would also have to assume the New York Yankees would win the World Series every year, because they're arguably the most storied franchise of them all. Somehow, it doesn't always work that way.
Let's cut to the chase. Even if the Red Wings come back and beat the Predators in the opening round of the playoffs -- in their heart of hearts -- does even their most die-hard fan or over kool-aided reporter really think they have a legitimate shot at going on to eliminate two more superior teams from the west -- then conquering whatever beast from the east survives, to win the Stanley Cup? REALLY?
It's not going to happen for one simple reason. They're not good enough. Upsets can happen in a single game, but given the four best of 7 gauntlet series' they would have to skate through and survive to capture Lord Stanley's prize -- not a chance. And in the world of pro sports, isn't a championship all that supposedly matters?
Maybe not. There's someone else who has a keen interest in how far the Red Wings get in the playoffs. That would be their owner, one Mike Ilitch, the Little Caesar's pizza magnate. No doubt, like the fans and reporters, Ilitch would like nothing better than to have his team win another championship, but there's another reason going on too.
Major league baseball, the NFL, and the NBA all have "revenue-sharing" agreements when it comes to dividing up the money pool accumulated from fan attendance at games. That applies in the regular season, and the playoffs as well. The NHL is a little different. During the regular season they do pretty much the same thing, but once the playoffs start, the rules change. It's every owner for himself. Whatever "gate" they take in at their home venue -- they get to keep all to themselves. Given sold out arenas at ramped up playoff ticket prices -- that's big bucks. While fans and reporters would likely love to see their team "sweep" the opposition in 4 straight games, nothing is better for an owner than having the series prolonged for at least another home game, or two, in which their team finally prevails. Cha-ching. On to the next round, where they're guaranteed at least two more. That can buy a lot of cheese and pepperoni, or maybe even a free agent. Ba-da-boom.
But the Red Wings winning the Cup this year? Sorry, but massive amounts of Kool-Aid won't make it happen. Besides, Kool-Aid is owned by Kraft. Last time I looked the magnate of THAT empire was named Robert Kraft, the owner of the New England Patriots. Not sure about pepperoni, but that man surely knows his cheese.
So here's the deal. I'll get on the Red Wings' Stanley Cup winning bandwagon when I see Robert Kraft throw an octopus on the ice at Joe Louis Arena.
Until then, I ain't buying it.
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
The Bobby Petrino scandal
University of Arkansas head football coach Bobby Petrino got fired. Did he deserve it? Absolutely.
As a long-time motorcycle rider myself, I can sympathize with him laying a bike down. I wouldn't wish that on anybody. I did it once, as a young man, and it hurt -- a lot. Yours truly is unaware of the current helmet laws, or lack thereof, in the state of Arkansas, but if he chose not to wear one, along with his passenger, and something bad happens -- well -- to each their own, but sometimes there's consequences. In a not so funny way, the news pix of Bobby show him with a bit of road rash and a neck brace, while showing his passenger like she's posing for her senior picture. That's unfair media coverage. There's no way she looked like that after the bike went down, so why not show the same sort of post-accident photo of her as they did Petrino?
Petrino is, for now, a married man, with four kids. He's 51 years old. His passenger, Jessica Dorrell, is a 25 year old blond beauty, who he's alleged to have had an on-going "affair" with for some time. It's further alleged that Petrino not only put her on his (the university's/state) payroll, but gave her some sort of $20,000 "bonus" along the way.
That was bad enough, but when confronted with the initial allegations by his superiors, he sealed his fate by originally adopting a Nixon-esque posture of lying and trying to cover it up. We all remember how Watergate eventually turned out, and now Bobbygate has gone down the same path.
As a football coach, Petrino was excellent at Arkansas. The Razorbacks were, and are, a top-ten caliber team.
Thing is, the only people that get away with this sort of nonsense reside on Wall Street, not the gridiron. There will be no golden parachute for Bobby Petrino. All he got was a lead boot in the behind kicking him out the door and, in my opinion, deservedly so.
But in the "good ole boy" merry-go-round network of football coaches, don't be surprised if Petrino pops up on another campus in a year or two.
I certainly don't condone a married father having an affair. Using other people's money to finance it, and then lying about it, makes it even worse. In the end, even the football crazy people in Fayetteville knew this was way too big to be swept under the rug, It wasn't going to go away, and they did what they had to do with Petrino. I would venture a guess that his "missus" isn't exactly proud of him right about now either. He may have another problem coming up soon.
If I could send a message to Bobby, it would be this: If there's ever a next time -- wear a helmet. Laws or not, only the young studs that think they're Superman go without them these days. I support their right to do so, and wish them well but, like you, they're not indestructible either. They just haven't figured it out yet. If they're out there long enough, see enough stuff, and live through it, they will -- eventually. One never knows what the next mile will bring.
And forget about any future bimbos, at least on the bike. All they want to do is yap in your ear and won't sit still. You know football. I know riding. Trust me on this one.
As a long-time motorcycle rider myself, I can sympathize with him laying a bike down. I wouldn't wish that on anybody. I did it once, as a young man, and it hurt -- a lot. Yours truly is unaware of the current helmet laws, or lack thereof, in the state of Arkansas, but if he chose not to wear one, along with his passenger, and something bad happens -- well -- to each their own, but sometimes there's consequences. In a not so funny way, the news pix of Bobby show him with a bit of road rash and a neck brace, while showing his passenger like she's posing for her senior picture. That's unfair media coverage. There's no way she looked like that after the bike went down, so why not show the same sort of post-accident photo of her as they did Petrino?
Petrino is, for now, a married man, with four kids. He's 51 years old. His passenger, Jessica Dorrell, is a 25 year old blond beauty, who he's alleged to have had an on-going "affair" with for some time. It's further alleged that Petrino not only put her on his (the university's/state) payroll, but gave her some sort of $20,000 "bonus" along the way.
That was bad enough, but when confronted with the initial allegations by his superiors, he sealed his fate by originally adopting a Nixon-esque posture of lying and trying to cover it up. We all remember how Watergate eventually turned out, and now Bobbygate has gone down the same path.
As a football coach, Petrino was excellent at Arkansas. The Razorbacks were, and are, a top-ten caliber team.
Thing is, the only people that get away with this sort of nonsense reside on Wall Street, not the gridiron. There will be no golden parachute for Bobby Petrino. All he got was a lead boot in the behind kicking him out the door and, in my opinion, deservedly so.
But in the "good ole boy" merry-go-round network of football coaches, don't be surprised if Petrino pops up on another campus in a year or two.
I certainly don't condone a married father having an affair. Using other people's money to finance it, and then lying about it, makes it even worse. In the end, even the football crazy people in Fayetteville knew this was way too big to be swept under the rug, It wasn't going to go away, and they did what they had to do with Petrino. I would venture a guess that his "missus" isn't exactly proud of him right about now either. He may have another problem coming up soon.
If I could send a message to Bobby, it would be this: If there's ever a next time -- wear a helmet. Laws or not, only the young studs that think they're Superman go without them these days. I support their right to do so, and wish them well but, like you, they're not indestructible either. They just haven't figured it out yet. If they're out there long enough, see enough stuff, and live through it, they will -- eventually. One never knows what the next mile will bring.
And forget about any future bimbos, at least on the bike. All they want to do is yap in your ear and won't sit still. You know football. I know riding. Trust me on this one.
Following up on Ozzie Guillen
In my last post I neglected to address something, and it seems others have been quick to mention it. Originally, the point was not about whether people agreed or disagreed with Ozzie's comments about Fidel Castro, but rather his right to say them in the United States of America. I'll stand on that forevermore.
Of course, his dissenters, whether in Little Havana or elsewhere, are also free to speak their minds. Like Ozzie, they have every right to express their opinions. They can rant and rave, write newspaper columns, spew sound bytes on TV or talk radio, and even peacefully protest, via boycotts, marches, and other means. Rights go both ways, and well they should.
The problem arises when certain people want to punish an individual for speaking his/her own opinion, because they disagree with it. In the business world, it would be akin to a boss disciplining an employee because they liked apples, and he/she preferred oranges. One might logically ask -- what, pray tell, does that have to do with workplace efficiency?
That appears to be the case with Ozzie Guillen, though he's flip-flopping like a politician facing re-election on his Castro stance. First he loves and respects him. Facing a "constituent" uprising over those remarks, he decided he misspoke and has since apologized -- repeatedly.
Let's not kid ourselves. Like Detroit Tigers' manager Jim Leyland once said, Ozzie is dumb like a fox. Ozzie knew damn good and well what he was saying originally, but sometimes being a fox will bring the hounds into play, and that usually doesn't work out well for the fox by the end of the day.
In what appears to be somewhat of a compromise, Guillen got suspended for 5 games, likely with no pay. Perhaps that's enough meat to placate the hounds, and they can get on to mercilessly chasing other prey on another day.
Thing is -- unlike Ozzie -- the hounds are never penalized for writing or speaking a point of view that others disagree with. They're exempt. It might be interesting to see what would happen if a columnist had $100 deducted from his/her salary for every negative opinion that came in over what they wrote. As they are so fond of saying -- that would take things to a whole new level. Indeed, perhaps they would get a different perspective of what they put others through with their words.
Ozzie recently signed a 4-year deal with the Florida Marlins, worth about $10 million dollars. At roughly $2.5 million a year, suspending him for 5 games gets into his wallet to the tune of about $77,000 dollars.
To Ozzie, that's chump change, and he'll be back in about a week. Story over. Put 77 pounds of meat in the middle of a field, and hungry hounds will get after it. They won't care where that meat came from, or what it used to be. They'll dig in anyway, because it's their nature.
There's a difference.
Of course, his dissenters, whether in Little Havana or elsewhere, are also free to speak their minds. Like Ozzie, they have every right to express their opinions. They can rant and rave, write newspaper columns, spew sound bytes on TV or talk radio, and even peacefully protest, via boycotts, marches, and other means. Rights go both ways, and well they should.
The problem arises when certain people want to punish an individual for speaking his/her own opinion, because they disagree with it. In the business world, it would be akin to a boss disciplining an employee because they liked apples, and he/she preferred oranges. One might logically ask -- what, pray tell, does that have to do with workplace efficiency?
That appears to be the case with Ozzie Guillen, though he's flip-flopping like a politician facing re-election on his Castro stance. First he loves and respects him. Facing a "constituent" uprising over those remarks, he decided he misspoke and has since apologized -- repeatedly.
Let's not kid ourselves. Like Detroit Tigers' manager Jim Leyland once said, Ozzie is dumb like a fox. Ozzie knew damn good and well what he was saying originally, but sometimes being a fox will bring the hounds into play, and that usually doesn't work out well for the fox by the end of the day.
In what appears to be somewhat of a compromise, Guillen got suspended for 5 games, likely with no pay. Perhaps that's enough meat to placate the hounds, and they can get on to mercilessly chasing other prey on another day.
Thing is -- unlike Ozzie -- the hounds are never penalized for writing or speaking a point of view that others disagree with. They're exempt. It might be interesting to see what would happen if a columnist had $100 deducted from his/her salary for every negative opinion that came in over what they wrote. As they are so fond of saying -- that would take things to a whole new level. Indeed, perhaps they would get a different perspective of what they put others through with their words.
Ozzie recently signed a 4-year deal with the Florida Marlins, worth about $10 million dollars. At roughly $2.5 million a year, suspending him for 5 games gets into his wallet to the tune of about $77,000 dollars.
To Ozzie, that's chump change, and he'll be back in about a week. Story over. Put 77 pounds of meat in the middle of a field, and hungry hounds will get after it. They won't care where that meat came from, or what it used to be. They'll dig in anyway, because it's their nature.
There's a difference.
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Ozzie Guillen and Fidel Castro
Ozzie Guillen's recent remarks about Fidel Castro have landed him in hot water. Evidently Ozzie was quoted as saying he respected Fidel, because people have been trying to kill him for 60 years and that (expletive) is still here. His math, and language, might be a little off, but he's basically right. Fidel's lasted through 11 -- count em -- 11 US Presidents, from Eisenhower to the present day.
Ozzie's problem is being in the wrong place to make such statements. As the new manager of the Florida Marlins, which play in Miami, Oz stirred up a hornet's nest amongst the locals. It's no big secret that Miami is commonly referred to as Little Cuba, because about a million people there have roots to the island nation 90 miles away from Key West, and are vehemently anti-Castro.
But that misses the bigger point. Guillen is Venezuelan and became a naturalized US citizen in 2006. Whether one likes him and his latest remarks or not, being a citizen comes with that pesky little thing called freedom of speech. In other words, he has a right to express his opinion.
Sure, the Marlins could fine, or even fire him, because of the local backlash, but if the matter winds up in the courts -- Ozzie will win -- because he has to. The first Amendment of the Constitution demands it. Some might counter that argument and say his words were detrimental to the Florida Marlins franchise, which resulted in fans staying away from the games, and the subsequent loss of revenue that resulted. If so, they haven't been paying attention to reality. The Marlins have historically ranked towards the bottom of major league baseball teams in attendance. They were 29th out of 30 last year. It appears that many of the people that are currently bashing a baseball manager haven't gone to the games over the years to support their home team anyway. So who indeed has a right to trash talk?
Yet, unlike the Ozzie we have come to know, he has fallen into the old trap by apologizing, in an attempt to appease those who he may have offended. Not once, but twice, and a third apology is scheduled. It's always been a bad move. Short of saying something way out of bounds regarding race, religion, etc., --which this was not -- he should have stuck to his guns. He had/has a right. The wolves are always lurking, and apologizing shows weakness, which means more wolves will smell the scent and come. It's a recipe for eventually being eaten alive.
Someone said his remarks were akin to praising Hitler in New York's Jewish district. To which I say -- so what? Ozzie can go to San Fran's China Town handing out pictures of Mao, or Dearborn, Michigan, a predominantly Arab community, with the Star of David tattooed on his forehead. It shouldn't matter. If they don't like it -- that's THEIR problem.
In the end, he's a manager of a major league baseball club. He should be judged on how his team performs on the field, not on his personal opinions of unrelated matters.
Personally, I hope he sticks around for a while. Again, some like him, and some don't -- but his antics sure are fun to watch.
Ozzie's problem is being in the wrong place to make such statements. As the new manager of the Florida Marlins, which play in Miami, Oz stirred up a hornet's nest amongst the locals. It's no big secret that Miami is commonly referred to as Little Cuba, because about a million people there have roots to the island nation 90 miles away from Key West, and are vehemently anti-Castro.
But that misses the bigger point. Guillen is Venezuelan and became a naturalized US citizen in 2006. Whether one likes him and his latest remarks or not, being a citizen comes with that pesky little thing called freedom of speech. In other words, he has a right to express his opinion.
Sure, the Marlins could fine, or even fire him, because of the local backlash, but if the matter winds up in the courts -- Ozzie will win -- because he has to. The first Amendment of the Constitution demands it. Some might counter that argument and say his words were detrimental to the Florida Marlins franchise, which resulted in fans staying away from the games, and the subsequent loss of revenue that resulted. If so, they haven't been paying attention to reality. The Marlins have historically ranked towards the bottom of major league baseball teams in attendance. They were 29th out of 30 last year. It appears that many of the people that are currently bashing a baseball manager haven't gone to the games over the years to support their home team anyway. So who indeed has a right to trash talk?
Yet, unlike the Ozzie we have come to know, he has fallen into the old trap by apologizing, in an attempt to appease those who he may have offended. Not once, but twice, and a third apology is scheduled. It's always been a bad move. Short of saying something way out of bounds regarding race, religion, etc., --which this was not -- he should have stuck to his guns. He had/has a right. The wolves are always lurking, and apologizing shows weakness, which means more wolves will smell the scent and come. It's a recipe for eventually being eaten alive.
Someone said his remarks were akin to praising Hitler in New York's Jewish district. To which I say -- so what? Ozzie can go to San Fran's China Town handing out pictures of Mao, or Dearborn, Michigan, a predominantly Arab community, with the Star of David tattooed on his forehead. It shouldn't matter. If they don't like it -- that's THEIR problem.
In the end, he's a manager of a major league baseball club. He should be judged on how his team performs on the field, not on his personal opinions of unrelated matters.
Personally, I hope he sticks around for a while. Again, some like him, and some don't -- but his antics sure are fun to watch.
Monday, April 9, 2012
Sports nicknames. American style
Once upon a time, there was a baseball player named "The Mick". Everybody knows who that was. Same with "The Babe", or "The Georgia Peach", or "The Yankee Clipper". The list is long.
There was a boxer a while back that called himself "The Truth". He found out exactly that when a left hook connected to the side of his head, courtesy of a guy that was nicknamed "Iron Mike".
There were the "Golden Bear" and "The Shark" in golf. Another guy even had an "army". In basketball, a guy called himself "The Answer", though it appears he currently doesn't have one as to what happened to his career. Maybe he should get together with "The Truth" and have a long talk. Even an ancient Greek philosopher found his way onto the court. How else to explain "The Big Aristotle"?
Not to be confused with my ex, but tennis once even featured "The Ice Queen". They both won a lot of money, but only one has a room full of trophies -- I think.
Like Plato, Socrates, and Confucious, some modern day athletes only need one name to be instantly recognized. How about Kobe, Lebron, and Eldri..... ahem, Tiger? I doubt there's very many of those running around in the average neighborhood, at least for now. No telling how many of their fans have named their kids after them.
Regardless, I dare say Americans will always come up with nicknames for their sports heroes. At that, as the politically correct mind-warp propaganda continues to change our language, perhaps we will have to become more sensitive in the future regarding such things. "The Hit Man" probably wouldn't go over too well these days. And "The Bronx Bombers"? After 9/11 -- definitely not cool.
We have to be careful about that, but there's hope. A new hero has emerged, complete with nickname. Gerry Lester Watson. He just won a golf tournament called the Masters.
Ya gotta love a guy named Bubba.
There was a boxer a while back that called himself "The Truth". He found out exactly that when a left hook connected to the side of his head, courtesy of a guy that was nicknamed "Iron Mike".
There were the "Golden Bear" and "The Shark" in golf. Another guy even had an "army". In basketball, a guy called himself "The Answer", though it appears he currently doesn't have one as to what happened to his career. Maybe he should get together with "The Truth" and have a long talk. Even an ancient Greek philosopher found his way onto the court. How else to explain "The Big Aristotle"?
Not to be confused with my ex, but tennis once even featured "The Ice Queen". They both won a lot of money, but only one has a room full of trophies -- I think.
Like Plato, Socrates, and Confucious, some modern day athletes only need one name to be instantly recognized. How about Kobe, Lebron, and Eldri..... ahem, Tiger? I doubt there's very many of those running around in the average neighborhood, at least for now. No telling how many of their fans have named their kids after them.
Regardless, I dare say Americans will always come up with nicknames for their sports heroes. At that, as the politically correct mind-warp propaganda continues to change our language, perhaps we will have to become more sensitive in the future regarding such things. "The Hit Man" probably wouldn't go over too well these days. And "The Bronx Bombers"? After 9/11 -- definitely not cool.
We have to be careful about that, but there's hope. A new hero has emerged, complete with nickname. Gerry Lester Watson. He just won a golf tournament called the Masters.
Ya gotta love a guy named Bubba.
Saturday, April 7, 2012
The Masters Tournament
Something was very wrong with the TV coverage of this tournament during third round action. It felt as if the earth had shifted on it's axis, or perhaps we'd entered into some sort of twilight zone. In the furthest reaches of my mind -- which, granted, is likely akin to a one inch putt -- there was an eerie, ominous sense of something being horribly out of whack. Adding to the mounting dread of experiencing this strange new world was the fact I couldn't quite put my finger on what was out of place. Outwardly, everything appeared normal watching the best golfers in the world take on Augusta National, yet somehow it just -- wasn't.
Under very good playing conditions, it was quite the golfing extravaganza to watch. A little bit of everything was going on. Spectacular shots, and putts, abounded. Everything from eagles to quadruple bogies were on display. Some players fell back, while others charged up the leader board. Sentimental favorite Fast Freddie Couples, the co-leader after two rounds, didn't have a completely terrible day. He just couldn't keep pace with a few other guys that were blistering the course.
(Something's still wrong here.....)
One of the chargers was Phil Mickelson. At the end of the day, the always lovable lefty found himself merely one shot out of the lead, going into the finale on Sunday. Shooting 30 on the back nine at Augusta, under Masters' tournament pressure? That's not just good. That's awesome.
As the TV coverage progressed, CBS did a masterful job, no pun intended, of providing the viewers with blanket coverage of the action. From group to group, and hole to hole, complete with replays that were merely seconds old, it was like we could see everything going on at once.
And here's a shout-out to the people that actually run the tournament. They don't have to beg for TV sponsors. They can pick and choose who they "allow" to be associated with their crown jewel. Being a blue-chip championship, it only makes sense they would go with blue-chip sponsors. Like IBM and Exxon. No Japanese or Korean car companies allowed, and certainly no heathens running around hawking a credit card. Now THAT was a breath of magnolia-scented air. Thank you, whoever you are.
(That eerie feeling persisted. Something was out of place.....)
Then, toward the very end of the telecast, as the last of the players were finishing up their rounds -- it happened.
The mandatory Tiger Woods highlights. See Tiger make a good shot. See Tiger roll in a birdie putt. See Tiger smile. See Tiger frown. See Tiger floundering around 12 strokes back and hopelessly out of contention. But dammit, at least we got to see Tiger. How could we mere mortals possibly survive without our Tiger fix?
And now everything is back to normal in the world.
Whew. I'm sure glad THAT ordeal is over.
Under very good playing conditions, it was quite the golfing extravaganza to watch. A little bit of everything was going on. Spectacular shots, and putts, abounded. Everything from eagles to quadruple bogies were on display. Some players fell back, while others charged up the leader board. Sentimental favorite Fast Freddie Couples, the co-leader after two rounds, didn't have a completely terrible day. He just couldn't keep pace with a few other guys that were blistering the course.
(Something's still wrong here.....)
One of the chargers was Phil Mickelson. At the end of the day, the always lovable lefty found himself merely one shot out of the lead, going into the finale on Sunday. Shooting 30 on the back nine at Augusta, under Masters' tournament pressure? That's not just good. That's awesome.
As the TV coverage progressed, CBS did a masterful job, no pun intended, of providing the viewers with blanket coverage of the action. From group to group, and hole to hole, complete with replays that were merely seconds old, it was like we could see everything going on at once.
And here's a shout-out to the people that actually run the tournament. They don't have to beg for TV sponsors. They can pick and choose who they "allow" to be associated with their crown jewel. Being a blue-chip championship, it only makes sense they would go with blue-chip sponsors. Like IBM and Exxon. No Japanese or Korean car companies allowed, and certainly no heathens running around hawking a credit card. Now THAT was a breath of magnolia-scented air. Thank you, whoever you are.
(That eerie feeling persisted. Something was out of place.....)
Then, toward the very end of the telecast, as the last of the players were finishing up their rounds -- it happened.
The mandatory Tiger Woods highlights. See Tiger make a good shot. See Tiger roll in a birdie putt. See Tiger smile. See Tiger frown. See Tiger floundering around 12 strokes back and hopelessly out of contention. But dammit, at least we got to see Tiger. How could we mere mortals possibly survive without our Tiger fix?
And now everything is back to normal in the world.
Whew. I'm sure glad THAT ordeal is over.
Solving the Detroit Lions marijuana problems
It seems the Lions have a small problem going on with some of their players getting caught with weed recently. Should this be a concern? Maybe. Linebacker Bobby Carpenter, a versatile and valuable member of the team, recently left to join the New England Patriots. Perhaps he's squeaky clean and had a second hand smoke issue. Who knows?
But there's a better way. Get rid of head coach Jim Schwartz. He's never won anything anyway. Replace him with Ricky Williams as a player/head coach, for the best of several worlds. The Lions need help at the running back position, and talk about commitment, besides being a pretty good back, Williams was once so committed to his smoke, he quit the league to enjoy it. Put him in charge and let the whole team smoke dope. No worries about Roger Goodell and his NFL drug policies. Fed-Ex him an ounce of Hawaiian, and watch him mellow out in a hurry.
Pass out joints at the turnstiles of Ford Field to every entering fan, and make bong usage mandatory in the press box for every reporter. Their columns could get very entertaining -- and that would be a good thing, if everybody would get on the stone train.
Even better, it would be helpful to the economy. Can you imagine the sales at the concession stands?
The Lions probably still won't get to the Super Bowl, but nobody in Detroit would care. The days of contract hold-outs for a couple more million would be over. Give them a brick from Maui and they'd sign for the minimum. Ticket prices would go down, which means the average fan could not only attend more games, but bring their own dope, which would cut down on the overhead costs for the Lions. It's a win-win-win.
Concussion symptoms? Who's going to know the difference -- or even care? Another problem solved.
If it had been this way before, Ndahmukong Suh would have never stomped that Green Bay Packer. He might have curled up next to him and said, "I think we're supposed to win, but down deep, I've always loved you, my brother. Got major pizza going on at my place later. Get your guys together and come on over". Hey, it would have beat getting suspended and crashing cars.
According to some, there's way too much rage going on. We need to be more civilized and always show kindness and respect to our fellow human beings, even during historically brutal athletic contests.
But then they always make a big deal about how important winning is. I wish they'd make up their minds.
Ricky Williams would be a good start to level the playing field for all.
If that were to happen, what could be better than having muted a Lions TV broadcast -- and using Cheech and Chongs' "Big Bamboo" for the audio play-by-play? Perfect.
I'm getting hungry already just thinking about it.....
But there's a better way. Get rid of head coach Jim Schwartz. He's never won anything anyway. Replace him with Ricky Williams as a player/head coach, for the best of several worlds. The Lions need help at the running back position, and talk about commitment, besides being a pretty good back, Williams was once so committed to his smoke, he quit the league to enjoy it. Put him in charge and let the whole team smoke dope. No worries about Roger Goodell and his NFL drug policies. Fed-Ex him an ounce of Hawaiian, and watch him mellow out in a hurry.
Pass out joints at the turnstiles of Ford Field to every entering fan, and make bong usage mandatory in the press box for every reporter. Their columns could get very entertaining -- and that would be a good thing, if everybody would get on the stone train.
Even better, it would be helpful to the economy. Can you imagine the sales at the concession stands?
The Lions probably still won't get to the Super Bowl, but nobody in Detroit would care. The days of contract hold-outs for a couple more million would be over. Give them a brick from Maui and they'd sign for the minimum. Ticket prices would go down, which means the average fan could not only attend more games, but bring their own dope, which would cut down on the overhead costs for the Lions. It's a win-win-win.
Concussion symptoms? Who's going to know the difference -- or even care? Another problem solved.
If it had been this way before, Ndahmukong Suh would have never stomped that Green Bay Packer. He might have curled up next to him and said, "I think we're supposed to win, but down deep, I've always loved you, my brother. Got major pizza going on at my place later. Get your guys together and come on over". Hey, it would have beat getting suspended and crashing cars.
According to some, there's way too much rage going on. We need to be more civilized and always show kindness and respect to our fellow human beings, even during historically brutal athletic contests.
But then they always make a big deal about how important winning is. I wish they'd make up their minds.
Ricky Williams would be a good start to level the playing field for all.
If that were to happen, what could be better than having muted a Lions TV broadcast -- and using Cheech and Chongs' "Big Bamboo" for the audio play-by-play? Perfect.
I'm getting hungry already just thinking about it.....
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