Lance Armstrong, a legend in bicycle racing, for more reasons than one, has agreed to be interviewed by Oprah Winfrey. That will be televised Jan 17 on the Oprah Winfrey Network (OWN), which is actually a pretty fitting moniker for her cable channel. That girl owns a whole bunch of stuff.
Many have surmised that Armstrong will finally "come clean", admit to all his alleged use of performance enhancing drugs, disallowed blood transfusions, and other shenanigans while winning all those Tour de France titles. He might even break down, cry, and beg for forgiveness.
Don't count on it.
Why? Because Armstrong would have to be crazy to do such a thing. Armstrong may or may not be a lot of things -- but unless he's gone off the deep end in the last few days -- he's no fool, by a long shot.
If Armstrong were to say he was guilty of the storm of allegations that have been directed his way for the last several years -- having been stripped of his titles, lost sponsors, and even been forced out of the cancer research foundation he himself established would be the least of his worries. Nor would how he was perceived by the court of public opinion be relevant. He's already been convicted there.
Because if he did that, various civil law suits against him would likely quickly follow. It's been estimated Lance is worth about $100 million right now. Some of those very same sponsors that once showered him with money would claim they had been duped, and never would have put that money up in the first place if they knew Armstrong was a "doper". They'd want their money back -- plus interest. Armstrong would have no defense, having already admitted to the crimes. By the time the lawyers got done carving him up, that $100 million would probably go poof in a hurry.
That would be bad enough, but there's something much worse. If Armstrong fesses up now, tears and heartfelt apology or not, he'd expose himself to perjury charges. Sure, people lie in courtrooms every day all over the country, but both prosecutors and defense attorneys usually let that slide, because it's not worth the time and energy to pursue it -- and damn tough to prove, as well.
Such would not be the case for Armstrong. Having battled the mighty feds and an international agency to a draw over several years, they'd go back after him with guns blazing, and have plenty of his own previous statements on record as evidence to back it up. Sometimes perjury is punishable by up to 20 years in prison. And it's probably a pretty safe bet to say the once foiled persecutors would be going for the max.
In a way, it's like the OJ Simpson saga. What he did in Vegas wasn't all that big of a deal, but he'll probably never get out of prison. Why? Because the powers-that-be were looking for a reason -- ANY reason -- to nail him, after they were embarrassed the first time around. Once he was dumb enough to give them one, they probably gobbled a handful of Viagra and headed off to court with the resulting, ahem, attitude. They finally had their man over a barrel.
Yours truly never got caught up in all the PED mania anyway. Some guys used, some didn't, and it will never all be definitively sorted out. It was a sign of the times, like others that have come and gone before. In my opinion, dwelling on such things serves no purpose other than to jack up one's own blood pressure. It happened, and now it's over. Let's move on.
But I doubt the prosecutors would have the same altruistic outlook if Lance tells Oprah what many people think he will.
Those good ole Texas boys, like guys named Clemens, or even Bush and Cheney, usually aren't too quick to get in line with the rest of the herd being marched off to the slaughterhouse.
And I'd be highly surprised if Lance Armstrong puts himself in the same position.
Surely, he's a little wilier than OJ -- right?
We'll see.....
Thursday, January 10, 2013
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
Rob Ryan, nukes, and the circus
Extra, extra, read all about it, the newsboys used to yell back when newspapers would print a special edition for a notable event, before the corporate bean-counters took over. These days, nuclear war likely wouldn't budge them from their daily deadlines. The mushroom clouds can wait until regular business hours tomorrow.
But make no mistake. An earth-shaking event just happened in Dallas. Cowboys' defensive coordinator Rob Ryan was fired, and the Robster appeared absolutely radioactive with the fall-out he was generating.
When I got here, this defense was near the bottom of league, and I made them better, Ryan snorted, while attempting to puff out his plumage like some sort of deranged peacock.
"I won't be out of work for 5 minutes", he sneered.
Well, he was wrong about that. The 5 minutes has come and gone, along with several hours, and it might well turn into several days.
But I have little doubt he'll remain unemployed for very long. There are always people in need of the services he can provide, and would gladly hire him in a heartbeat.
Like the Ringling Bros/Barnum and Bailey travelling circus. The pay might not be so hot, but they're always open to new side-show acts.
If he could only somehow manage to take his twin brother Rex along from the NY Jets, they could become a sensation.
I'd gladly fork over a few bucks to see what they were up to "behind the curtain".
But make no mistake. An earth-shaking event just happened in Dallas. Cowboys' defensive coordinator Rob Ryan was fired, and the Robster appeared absolutely radioactive with the fall-out he was generating.
When I got here, this defense was near the bottom of league, and I made them better, Ryan snorted, while attempting to puff out his plumage like some sort of deranged peacock.
"I won't be out of work for 5 minutes", he sneered.
Well, he was wrong about that. The 5 minutes has come and gone, along with several hours, and it might well turn into several days.
But I have little doubt he'll remain unemployed for very long. There are always people in need of the services he can provide, and would gladly hire him in a heartbeat.
Like the Ringling Bros/Barnum and Bailey travelling circus. The pay might not be so hot, but they're always open to new side-show acts.
If he could only somehow manage to take his twin brother Rex along from the NY Jets, they could become a sensation.
I'd gladly fork over a few bucks to see what they were up to "behind the curtain".
Denard Robinson. Pro prospects
Few would doubt that former Univ of Mich QB Denard Robinson is an exceptionally gifted athlete. He seems to be one of those guys (or girls) that comes along every once in a great while that can be very good at just about any sport they try their hand at. Yours truly wouldn't be a bit surprised if Denard could do very well at baseball, hoops, golf, tennis, bowling, you name it -- if he put his mind to it. He's one in a million. A natural.
Yet that only goes so far. Being a lot better than the average John/Jane Schmo is lights years away from competing at the top levels of any sport. Some of the best in their respective games tried their hands at other sports and couldn't cut it. Michael Jordan thought he could play major league baseball. He wasn't good enough. Seen Charles Barkley's golf swing? His own word "turrible" doesn't give it justice. Guys like Danny Ainge and Bo Jackson that were good enough to compete at the pro level in two different sports are more like one in a billion.
Even in the same sport, at the pro level, things get highly specialized. An NHL goalie wouldn't be much use as a right/left winger, nor vice-versa. Even a Triple Crown winning baseball slugger like Miguel Cabrera would get shelled if he ever took the pitching mound. And I'm pretty sure we won't see point guards like Chris Paul or Rajon Rondo posting up underneath the basket anytime soon. But nowhere is the degree of specialization more prominent than it is in the NFL.
And that means Denard Robinson might have a problem. He's certainly multi-talented, but is he good enough at just one position to justify his presence on an NFL team? The competition is ferocious for every last roster spot and, just where exactly, might Denard find his niche?
Many knowledgable football people say that Robinson won't even be considered as a QB in the NFL. We can also probably rule out linebacker or even tight end. He's nowhere near big enough.
Could he withstand the pounding an NFL running back gets every game? Hard to say, but call yours truly skeptical.
A wide receiver? He's certainly fast enough, but he's only 6 feet tall. Pro teams these days prefer their wide-outs to have much longer reaches. Further, does Robinson possess the hands of glue and/or the intestinal fortitude to run a route across the middle into a zone, knowing a hard charging safety bigger than he is will rock his world a nano-second after the ball arrives? Unknown.
Becoming a defensive back is a possibility, but that requires an entirely different skill set too. During his college days, Robinson could run and the other guys would have to react. As a cornerback, the tables would be turned. Not only are most pro receivers every bit as fast as Robinson, if not faster, they know where they're going on their routes, and Denard would have to become the reactor. One split second of indecision might well result in the wide receiver trotting into the end zone for a touchdown. Even All-Pro corners get burned once in a while. Could Robinson step in and be competitive at a brand new position to him going up against the finest in the world on the other side? Nobody knows for sure.
Robinson could likely play on "special teams", either as a kamikaze covering kicks, or better yet as a punt and kickoff returner himself. Yet with the very nature of the high speed contact that goes along with those positions, players get "blown up" all the time. The other guys are playing for keeps too, remember?
Denard Robinson will definitely get drafted by a pro team. Which one is a total crap shoot, but I'll take a wild guess and say he'll go in the 2nd round. Despite his all-around athleticism, right now, he's not good enough at any particular skill position to be a 1st rounder, because 1st rounders are supposed to immediately step in and be difference makers.
Regardless, here's wishing him the best, wherever he lands. Can't be any worse than Sir Charles' golf swing, or Michael Jordan trying to hit a curve ball -- right?
Yet that only goes so far. Being a lot better than the average John/Jane Schmo is lights years away from competing at the top levels of any sport. Some of the best in their respective games tried their hands at other sports and couldn't cut it. Michael Jordan thought he could play major league baseball. He wasn't good enough. Seen Charles Barkley's golf swing? His own word "turrible" doesn't give it justice. Guys like Danny Ainge and Bo Jackson that were good enough to compete at the pro level in two different sports are more like one in a billion.
Even in the same sport, at the pro level, things get highly specialized. An NHL goalie wouldn't be much use as a right/left winger, nor vice-versa. Even a Triple Crown winning baseball slugger like Miguel Cabrera would get shelled if he ever took the pitching mound. And I'm pretty sure we won't see point guards like Chris Paul or Rajon Rondo posting up underneath the basket anytime soon. But nowhere is the degree of specialization more prominent than it is in the NFL.
And that means Denard Robinson might have a problem. He's certainly multi-talented, but is he good enough at just one position to justify his presence on an NFL team? The competition is ferocious for every last roster spot and, just where exactly, might Denard find his niche?
Many knowledgable football people say that Robinson won't even be considered as a QB in the NFL. We can also probably rule out linebacker or even tight end. He's nowhere near big enough.
Could he withstand the pounding an NFL running back gets every game? Hard to say, but call yours truly skeptical.
A wide receiver? He's certainly fast enough, but he's only 6 feet tall. Pro teams these days prefer their wide-outs to have much longer reaches. Further, does Robinson possess the hands of glue and/or the intestinal fortitude to run a route across the middle into a zone, knowing a hard charging safety bigger than he is will rock his world a nano-second after the ball arrives? Unknown.
Becoming a defensive back is a possibility, but that requires an entirely different skill set too. During his college days, Robinson could run and the other guys would have to react. As a cornerback, the tables would be turned. Not only are most pro receivers every bit as fast as Robinson, if not faster, they know where they're going on their routes, and Denard would have to become the reactor. One split second of indecision might well result in the wide receiver trotting into the end zone for a touchdown. Even All-Pro corners get burned once in a while. Could Robinson step in and be competitive at a brand new position to him going up against the finest in the world on the other side? Nobody knows for sure.
Robinson could likely play on "special teams", either as a kamikaze covering kicks, or better yet as a punt and kickoff returner himself. Yet with the very nature of the high speed contact that goes along with those positions, players get "blown up" all the time. The other guys are playing for keeps too, remember?
Denard Robinson will definitely get drafted by a pro team. Which one is a total crap shoot, but I'll take a wild guess and say he'll go in the 2nd round. Despite his all-around athleticism, right now, he's not good enough at any particular skill position to be a 1st rounder, because 1st rounders are supposed to immediately step in and be difference makers.
Regardless, here's wishing him the best, wherever he lands. Can't be any worse than Sir Charles' golf swing, or Michael Jordan trying to hit a curve ball -- right?
Notre Dame/Bama. An ass-whuppin'
Though Notre Dame and Alabama most certainly have their faithful followings, would anyone really dispute they're also #1 and #2, not necessarily in that order, the most disliked college football teams in America nationwide?
Nevertheless, if you watched the game, how else can you put it? A mismatch. Men against boys. Worms against robins. Kitty cats against pit bulls. Barney Fifes against Rambos. What the Crimson Tide did to the Fighting Irish was a flat-out beatdown.
Notre Dame's vaunted defense, which was statistically amongst the best in the nation regarding allowing points scored, rushing, passing, and total yards against -- was shredded. Bama had not one, but two running backs that gained over 100 yards. When Notre Dame tried to stuff the run, Alabama's sure-handed wide receivers made catches for big chunks of yardage. They not only dominated every facet of the game, including both sides of the line of scrimmage, but even had veteran announcer Brent Musberger throw out the comment -- "If this were a boxing match, they'd call it off". And that was only towards the end of the FIRST HALF, when Alabama was cruising along to the tune of 28-0.
To start the 3rd quarter, after intercepting a Notre Dame pass, Alabama stuffed a 97-yard touchdown drive down the throats of the leprechauns to make it 35-0. By then, the fat lady was into her encores. The late Dandy Don Meredith had turned out the lights. Even Yogi Berra likely would have said it was over.
Then it appeared Bama lost a bit of their intensity. That was understandable. It's tough to stay geeked when you already know you can swat your opponent down like a pesky mosquito anytime you feel like it. Though the Crimson Tide faithful were no doubt rooting for a shut-out, and complete humiliation, the boys from South Bend finally scored a touchdown. Alabama would match it with yet another of their own -- just to remind them that while they were kicking back a bit, they could still light them up whenever they felt like it. Towards the end Notre Dame scored a meaningless touchdown in "garbage time". Final score 42-14, and it wasn't even that close.
A couple interesting things happened, though. Alabama still had some fight left in them. They'd become bored with Notre Dame, so their QB A.J. McCarron got into an altercation with Barrett Jones, his own center, of all people. Evidently, Jones didn't snap the ball when A.J. wanted him to so the QB got up into his face. Most times an offensive lineman would take such abuse, but not Jones. He shoved his own QB away on national TV, and who knows what he said.... but I'd guess it was something like -- get outta my face boy. Probably good advice, given that Jones outweighed him by about 100 lbs, and is likely a first round NFL draft pick, while A.J. doesn't seem to have the pro scouts aflutter just yet.
Of course, there's the ever-lovable Alabama head coach Nick Saban, that seems to have made a career out of displaying the loyalty of a vulture. Many times Saban will allow himself to be interviewed in what looks a lot like Butler's Cabin at the famed Augusta National golf course, home of the Masters Tournament. A nice quiet setting, the fireplace softly burning in the background, Nick comfortably clad in casual attire, replete with leisure shoes and no socks, and fielding "softball" questions that are offered up to him by the suck-ass reporter of the day. Perhaps the only thing that would be better is if the good Mr. Saban would be quoting Gandhi or Mother Teresa while thoughtfully smoking a pipe between his eloquent responses. Aah. How peaceful.
But then see him on the sidelines of a football field, where he can turn into a neck-vein-bulging, spit-spraying, name your cuss word raving lunatic while berating officials over a call he didn't particularly care for. Oh my. It appears the little mercenary has his dark side indeed.
Regardless, congrats to Alabama after trashing Notre Dame and becoming national champions once again. Three times in 4 years is truly impressive.
But if I was one of those officials on the sidelines that was suffering the wrath of Saban, here's what I'd do -- For his first infraction, give him a warning that I'm only doing my job and back off. The second time around -- throw a penalty flag. A 15 yard penalty would be asssessed for unsportsmanlike conduct. Third time? Another 15 yard unsportsmanlike and immediate ejection from the game. Like many high profile head coaches, Saban seems to think he can abuse whoever he feels like at the time and get away with it.
Like his team put Notre Dame in their place, so should the officials step up and put people like Nick Saban in their place when they get start getting out of control and start thinking they're above reproach.
Do I hear any nay votes?
Nevertheless, if you watched the game, how else can you put it? A mismatch. Men against boys. Worms against robins. Kitty cats against pit bulls. Barney Fifes against Rambos. What the Crimson Tide did to the Fighting Irish was a flat-out beatdown.
Notre Dame's vaunted defense, which was statistically amongst the best in the nation regarding allowing points scored, rushing, passing, and total yards against -- was shredded. Bama had not one, but two running backs that gained over 100 yards. When Notre Dame tried to stuff the run, Alabama's sure-handed wide receivers made catches for big chunks of yardage. They not only dominated every facet of the game, including both sides of the line of scrimmage, but even had veteran announcer Brent Musberger throw out the comment -- "If this were a boxing match, they'd call it off". And that was only towards the end of the FIRST HALF, when Alabama was cruising along to the tune of 28-0.
To start the 3rd quarter, after intercepting a Notre Dame pass, Alabama stuffed a 97-yard touchdown drive down the throats of the leprechauns to make it 35-0. By then, the fat lady was into her encores. The late Dandy Don Meredith had turned out the lights. Even Yogi Berra likely would have said it was over.
Then it appeared Bama lost a bit of their intensity. That was understandable. It's tough to stay geeked when you already know you can swat your opponent down like a pesky mosquito anytime you feel like it. Though the Crimson Tide faithful were no doubt rooting for a shut-out, and complete humiliation, the boys from South Bend finally scored a touchdown. Alabama would match it with yet another of their own -- just to remind them that while they were kicking back a bit, they could still light them up whenever they felt like it. Towards the end Notre Dame scored a meaningless touchdown in "garbage time". Final score 42-14, and it wasn't even that close.
A couple interesting things happened, though. Alabama still had some fight left in them. They'd become bored with Notre Dame, so their QB A.J. McCarron got into an altercation with Barrett Jones, his own center, of all people. Evidently, Jones didn't snap the ball when A.J. wanted him to so the QB got up into his face. Most times an offensive lineman would take such abuse, but not Jones. He shoved his own QB away on national TV, and who knows what he said.... but I'd guess it was something like -- get outta my face boy. Probably good advice, given that Jones outweighed him by about 100 lbs, and is likely a first round NFL draft pick, while A.J. doesn't seem to have the pro scouts aflutter just yet.
Of course, there's the ever-lovable Alabama head coach Nick Saban, that seems to have made a career out of displaying the loyalty of a vulture. Many times Saban will allow himself to be interviewed in what looks a lot like Butler's Cabin at the famed Augusta National golf course, home of the Masters Tournament. A nice quiet setting, the fireplace softly burning in the background, Nick comfortably clad in casual attire, replete with leisure shoes and no socks, and fielding "softball" questions that are offered up to him by the suck-ass reporter of the day. Perhaps the only thing that would be better is if the good Mr. Saban would be quoting Gandhi or Mother Teresa while thoughtfully smoking a pipe between his eloquent responses. Aah. How peaceful.
But then see him on the sidelines of a football field, where he can turn into a neck-vein-bulging, spit-spraying, name your cuss word raving lunatic while berating officials over a call he didn't particularly care for. Oh my. It appears the little mercenary has his dark side indeed.
Regardless, congrats to Alabama after trashing Notre Dame and becoming national champions once again. Three times in 4 years is truly impressive.
But if I was one of those officials on the sidelines that was suffering the wrath of Saban, here's what I'd do -- For his first infraction, give him a warning that I'm only doing my job and back off. The second time around -- throw a penalty flag. A 15 yard penalty would be asssessed for unsportsmanlike conduct. Third time? Another 15 yard unsportsmanlike and immediate ejection from the game. Like many high profile head coaches, Saban seems to think he can abuse whoever he feels like at the time and get away with it.
Like his team put Notre Dame in their place, so should the officials step up and put people like Nick Saban in their place when they get start getting out of control and start thinking they're above reproach.
Do I hear any nay votes?
Sunday, January 6, 2013
The NFL playoffs
It's time to start sorting out the men from the boys -- or at least take a few wild guesses.
The Cincinnati Bengals were ousted by the Houston Texans. Did anybody really think the Bengals had a Libertarian Presidential candidate's chance of getting to the oval office, ahem, Super Bowl? Nah.
Yet the Texans seem to have faded a bit over the last half of the season.
Nobody thought the Minnesota Vikings would make much noise this year, but they did. Still, even with Adrian Peterson, the best running back in the league, and regardless of whether starting QB Christian Ponder was available (he wasn't), it's probably a fair statement to say they weren't legitimate Lombardi trophy contenders either. They overachieved this year, and good for them, but they got dumped by....
The Green Bay Packers. For the first time in what seems like forever, the Cheesers had everybody healthy. That not only included cornerback Charles Woodson and tasmanian devil linebacker Clay Matthews, but their full complement of receivers. Besides having Aaron Rodgers, the reigning MVP, throwing the ball, when a guy like Donald Driver sits about 6th or 7th on the depth chart, that's one helluva corps of receivers.
Both highly touted rookie QBs Andrew Luck of the Indianapolis Colts and Robert Griffin III are gone. In Griffin's case, he was playing on a bad leg to start with. Then the Redskins' rode him and rode him some more until his knee finally gave out. Playoffs or not -- that's what back-up QBs are for. To boot, former Michigan State QB Kirk Cousins had already proven he was more than capable of directing that team when RG III was hurt earlier in the season. There is no excuse for this. Shame on 'Skins head coach Mike Shanahan, and may the media roast him alive if it turns out Griffin's knee is in need of major surgical repair.
Ironically, the other rookie QB which flew under the radar, Russell Wilson and his Seattle Seahawks, move on. The Seahawks seem to be getting stronger and stronger as the season progresses. Head coach Pete Carroll has done a great job with that club. Yes, the same Pete Carroll that got fired by the NY Jets and then bailed from the USC Trojans leaving that team saddled with sanctions for things that happened under his watch. Yours truly is of the opinion that Pete Carroll has a little bit of snake oil salesman/mercenary in his DNA, but to each their own. The Seahawks next go to....
Atlanta, where the Falcons have quietly earned the #1 seed in the NFC, and will have home field advantage throughout the playoffs. The Falcons are certainly a solid team, and will be tough to beat at home, but am I the only one that just can't envision them getting to the Super Bowl?
Ray Lewis, of the Baltimore Ravens, says this will be his last year. Next, the Ravens have to go to...
Denver, where the ageless Peyton Manning seems to have the Broncos on cruise control. Plus a pretty stout defense, along with being a #1 seed themselves. All roads to the AFC championship go through Denver. Want to bet against Peyton at home? Not me.
The San Fran 49ers will host the Packers next week. Like Houston, SF seems to have lost some of their ferocity in recent weeks and Green Bay's on a roll. Should be a brutal game, and a tough one to call.
Houston goes to New England in the next round, the same place they got blown out 42-14 just a few weeks ago. Want to bet against Tom Brady, Bill Bellichick and Co., at home again in the rematch? Good luck.
It's a shame that all but 2 of the remaining teams in the hunt have to lose before the Super Bowl comes about. Some REALLY good ones have to go down. That's just the way it works.
Who will get to the Super Bowl? Beats the hell out of me. Not a clue, but it makes for some mighty interesting games in the next couple weeks.
Here's what I do know. Next year, the Detroit Lions will still have the same owner, William Clay Ford. They'll also have the same general manager, Martin Mayhew, who recently said he's not going to change his draft philosophy, even though the players he has drafted either can't stay healthy or are walking time bombs regarding both on, and off the field incidents. Could it be that the owner has been tutoring the GM on the side in his ivory tower? Night classes of Clueless 101?
Throw in the same loose cannon head coach, Jim Schwartz, who seems to know just about enough rules of the game to make a mockery of it. He would have been summarily fired by any self-respecting franchise after how his team performed this year. In Lionesque fashion, besides giving a career loser a mind-boggling 3-year contract extension before he'd even won a single playoff game, and who proceeded to proudly lead his current team straight to the dumpster, add most of the same gang of misfit players likely returning next year, and what will you have?
A few new gags and different props here and there, but still a clown act. The difference between the 3 Stooges and the Lions? Larry, Moe, and Curly made people laugh. William, Martin, and Jim make Lions' fans cry. The players themselves are like the extras in a Stooges clip throwing the pies and cream puffs around. Once one learns to see the Lions for what they've really been for the last half century, they become equally hilarious, with one minor difference. We've all seen the Stooges' routines enough times to KNOW what's going to happen next -- but somehow it's still funny. The Lions keep adding new material. One never knows what zany antics they'll come up with next, but it will be comical, if one can kick back and appreciate it for what it is.
But this is not the time for Bud and Lou's "who's on first, what's on second" routine, like the Lions.
It's NFL pare down time amongst good teams facing other good teams. Serious business.
I love this time of year.....
The Cincinnati Bengals were ousted by the Houston Texans. Did anybody really think the Bengals had a Libertarian Presidential candidate's chance of getting to the oval office, ahem, Super Bowl? Nah.
Yet the Texans seem to have faded a bit over the last half of the season.
Nobody thought the Minnesota Vikings would make much noise this year, but they did. Still, even with Adrian Peterson, the best running back in the league, and regardless of whether starting QB Christian Ponder was available (he wasn't), it's probably a fair statement to say they weren't legitimate Lombardi trophy contenders either. They overachieved this year, and good for them, but they got dumped by....
The Green Bay Packers. For the first time in what seems like forever, the Cheesers had everybody healthy. That not only included cornerback Charles Woodson and tasmanian devil linebacker Clay Matthews, but their full complement of receivers. Besides having Aaron Rodgers, the reigning MVP, throwing the ball, when a guy like Donald Driver sits about 6th or 7th on the depth chart, that's one helluva corps of receivers.
Both highly touted rookie QBs Andrew Luck of the Indianapolis Colts and Robert Griffin III are gone. In Griffin's case, he was playing on a bad leg to start with. Then the Redskins' rode him and rode him some more until his knee finally gave out. Playoffs or not -- that's what back-up QBs are for. To boot, former Michigan State QB Kirk Cousins had already proven he was more than capable of directing that team when RG III was hurt earlier in the season. There is no excuse for this. Shame on 'Skins head coach Mike Shanahan, and may the media roast him alive if it turns out Griffin's knee is in need of major surgical repair.
Ironically, the other rookie QB which flew under the radar, Russell Wilson and his Seattle Seahawks, move on. The Seahawks seem to be getting stronger and stronger as the season progresses. Head coach Pete Carroll has done a great job with that club. Yes, the same Pete Carroll that got fired by the NY Jets and then bailed from the USC Trojans leaving that team saddled with sanctions for things that happened under his watch. Yours truly is of the opinion that Pete Carroll has a little bit of snake oil salesman/mercenary in his DNA, but to each their own. The Seahawks next go to....
Atlanta, where the Falcons have quietly earned the #1 seed in the NFC, and will have home field advantage throughout the playoffs. The Falcons are certainly a solid team, and will be tough to beat at home, but am I the only one that just can't envision them getting to the Super Bowl?
Ray Lewis, of the Baltimore Ravens, says this will be his last year. Next, the Ravens have to go to...
Denver, where the ageless Peyton Manning seems to have the Broncos on cruise control. Plus a pretty stout defense, along with being a #1 seed themselves. All roads to the AFC championship go through Denver. Want to bet against Peyton at home? Not me.
The San Fran 49ers will host the Packers next week. Like Houston, SF seems to have lost some of their ferocity in recent weeks and Green Bay's on a roll. Should be a brutal game, and a tough one to call.
Houston goes to New England in the next round, the same place they got blown out 42-14 just a few weeks ago. Want to bet against Tom Brady, Bill Bellichick and Co., at home again in the rematch? Good luck.
It's a shame that all but 2 of the remaining teams in the hunt have to lose before the Super Bowl comes about. Some REALLY good ones have to go down. That's just the way it works.
Who will get to the Super Bowl? Beats the hell out of me. Not a clue, but it makes for some mighty interesting games in the next couple weeks.
Here's what I do know. Next year, the Detroit Lions will still have the same owner, William Clay Ford. They'll also have the same general manager, Martin Mayhew, who recently said he's not going to change his draft philosophy, even though the players he has drafted either can't stay healthy or are walking time bombs regarding both on, and off the field incidents. Could it be that the owner has been tutoring the GM on the side in his ivory tower? Night classes of Clueless 101?
Throw in the same loose cannon head coach, Jim Schwartz, who seems to know just about enough rules of the game to make a mockery of it. He would have been summarily fired by any self-respecting franchise after how his team performed this year. In Lionesque fashion, besides giving a career loser a mind-boggling 3-year contract extension before he'd even won a single playoff game, and who proceeded to proudly lead his current team straight to the dumpster, add most of the same gang of misfit players likely returning next year, and what will you have?
A few new gags and different props here and there, but still a clown act. The difference between the 3 Stooges and the Lions? Larry, Moe, and Curly made people laugh. William, Martin, and Jim make Lions' fans cry. The players themselves are like the extras in a Stooges clip throwing the pies and cream puffs around. Once one learns to see the Lions for what they've really been for the last half century, they become equally hilarious, with one minor difference. We've all seen the Stooges' routines enough times to KNOW what's going to happen next -- but somehow it's still funny. The Lions keep adding new material. One never knows what zany antics they'll come up with next, but it will be comical, if one can kick back and appreciate it for what it is.
But this is not the time for Bud and Lou's "who's on first, what's on second" routine, like the Lions.
It's NFL pare down time amongst good teams facing other good teams. Serious business.
I love this time of year.....
Saturday, January 5, 2013
LA Clippers/Lakers
The Clippers just beat the Lakers -- again. Despite the purple and gold crew having shelled out Pentagon type money to acquire a couple free agents, the Lakers can't seem to find their way to the .500 mark, and now find themselves over 10 games behind those same Clips, who are cruising along with the beat record in the league. Who would have thought it possible -- just a couple years ago?
The Lakers have always been about "showtime". Whether it was the actual premier players that seemed to come in a never-ending supply to LA-LA Land, to the glitterati that were in attendance at the games -- the Lakers were a must see. Their list of superstars and championships is long. Even owner Jerry Buss has been known to sit in on high-stakes poker games with some of the best professional card sharks in the world.
Conversely, the LA Clippers have been known as sad-sacks of the league since forever. Not long ago, they remained the punch line of many a joke for comedians. Their owner Donald Tokowitz, the son of Jewish immigrants (he legally added the name "Sterling" later) was known for being a cheapskate. The "other" Donald seemed to be in a never-ending penny-ante game of "go fish".
Watching a Clippers/Lakers game is chock full of irony. After all, they share the same arena, the Staples Center in LA. Technically, one of them has to be the home team, and the other the visitor. They both have their own "home" locker rooms, so nothing changes there. Whether it's true or not, yours truly knoweth not, but I was once told the Staples Center has 11, count em, 11 locker rooms. If so, good grief, who can they all be for? Sure, a true visiting team from another city would warrant their own, but what about the other 8? Well OK, the refs probably get a little one. Does Jack Nicholson have his own? The cheerleaders? Magic or Kareem when they're in town? Maybe Kobe has 2 or 3 for his entourage. When free agents like Dwight Howard, Pao Gasol and Steve Nash signed on, was their own locker room included as part of their contracts? Beats me, but 11 sounds like WAY too many.
What's even weirder is the court itself. When the Lakers and Clippers play against each other, how the hardwood is decorated all depends on which team is the "home" team. If it's Kobe and Co., the middle of the court will feature a giant decal that says "Lakers", and the "paint" from the free throw line to the basket will be painted yellow. If Blake Griffin and the Clips are the "home" team, the giant decal will say "Clippers", and the same "lanes" will be blue. If they play back-to-back games, "home and home", if you will, even though nobody's gone anywhere, somebody's busy changing all that stuff. How dumb is that?
It's the same damn court, with the same teams occupying the same locker rooms they have for years. Why not just put a giant "Los Angeles" decal in the middle of the court and be done with it? The free throw lanes? What do you get when you mix yellow and blue? Paint them green and be done with that too. Or paint them pink, or black, or chartreuse, or whatever. Who cares what color they are anyway? HELLO?
Hard telling how the season will play out, let alone what will happen in the playoffs. But right now, with the Clips tearing it up and the Lakers limping along, that little corner of the sports world has been turned upside down. This is not supposed to happen. The Lakers have historically been a marquis team that draws sell-out crowds wherever they go. Nobody went out of their way to see the
Clippers come to town to face their home team.
Though they won't come out and say so -- the media wants to see the Lakers win. Countless deep-pocketed sponsors want the Lakers to win. Celebrities and politicians galore want the Lakers to win. And trust me, TV network executives want the Lakers to win. The ratings thing. All is right in the world when the Lakers win.
Yet now, despite the recent typical "blockbuster" free agent signings, the lights seem to be dimming rapidly on "showtime". Not only are they getting beat by teams they would have crushed in the past, they've become the "little brother" in their own building.
Who would have thunk it?
But it's real. The Clips are not only good, but they're young and will likely get better. Besides a couple superstars of their own, they've got that magical thing called chemistry -- and a great coach -- Vinny del Negro -- that doesn't care about the limelight. He just quietly goes about his game strategy and gets it done. The Lakers seem to have a bunch of divas that are all talented in their own way, but can't seem to come together and function as a unit. By most accounts, their new coach, Mark D-Antoni is a funny guy. The players love him, but he quickly took a back seat to the ever-present super-sized egos on his team, and they don't appear to have a clue what's coming next -- other than Kobe taking 40 or 50 shots a game, while clueless himself when it comes to playing any sort of defense. The Lakers seem to miss the Zen Master, Phil Jackson. He was a high-profile guy himself, who loved the limelight, but improbably, somehow it worked.
Bottom line? They need to decide how the court at Staples Center is going to look, and stick to it. And if they have that many locker rooms, they should donate a few to worthy causes. Like the Boy/Girl scouts, or the Humane Society. Lord knows there's plenty of dogs running around LA. Why not put them up in nice digs? How about the Campfire Girls? Who's going to notice one more fire in LA anyway? Perhaps the Rotary Club? No, that's for fired head coaches going to another team. They'll be getting a new locker room anyway. Bad idea. Forget that. The Lions' Club? Don't even get me started on that one. Still, it seems like there ought to be a better way to make use of all those facilities.
In the meantime, excuse me for being a wrong-thinker -- but I love it when Blake dunks on Kobe.
The Lakers have always been about "showtime". Whether it was the actual premier players that seemed to come in a never-ending supply to LA-LA Land, to the glitterati that were in attendance at the games -- the Lakers were a must see. Their list of superstars and championships is long. Even owner Jerry Buss has been known to sit in on high-stakes poker games with some of the best professional card sharks in the world.
Conversely, the LA Clippers have been known as sad-sacks of the league since forever. Not long ago, they remained the punch line of many a joke for comedians. Their owner Donald Tokowitz, the son of Jewish immigrants (he legally added the name "Sterling" later) was known for being a cheapskate. The "other" Donald seemed to be in a never-ending penny-ante game of "go fish".
Watching a Clippers/Lakers game is chock full of irony. After all, they share the same arena, the Staples Center in LA. Technically, one of them has to be the home team, and the other the visitor. They both have their own "home" locker rooms, so nothing changes there. Whether it's true or not, yours truly knoweth not, but I was once told the Staples Center has 11, count em, 11 locker rooms. If so, good grief, who can they all be for? Sure, a true visiting team from another city would warrant their own, but what about the other 8? Well OK, the refs probably get a little one. Does Jack Nicholson have his own? The cheerleaders? Magic or Kareem when they're in town? Maybe Kobe has 2 or 3 for his entourage. When free agents like Dwight Howard, Pao Gasol and Steve Nash signed on, was their own locker room included as part of their contracts? Beats me, but 11 sounds like WAY too many.
What's even weirder is the court itself. When the Lakers and Clippers play against each other, how the hardwood is decorated all depends on which team is the "home" team. If it's Kobe and Co., the middle of the court will feature a giant decal that says "Lakers", and the "paint" from the free throw line to the basket will be painted yellow. If Blake Griffin and the Clips are the "home" team, the giant decal will say "Clippers", and the same "lanes" will be blue. If they play back-to-back games, "home and home", if you will, even though nobody's gone anywhere, somebody's busy changing all that stuff. How dumb is that?
It's the same damn court, with the same teams occupying the same locker rooms they have for years. Why not just put a giant "Los Angeles" decal in the middle of the court and be done with it? The free throw lanes? What do you get when you mix yellow and blue? Paint them green and be done with that too. Or paint them pink, or black, or chartreuse, or whatever. Who cares what color they are anyway? HELLO?
Hard telling how the season will play out, let alone what will happen in the playoffs. But right now, with the Clips tearing it up and the Lakers limping along, that little corner of the sports world has been turned upside down. This is not supposed to happen. The Lakers have historically been a marquis team that draws sell-out crowds wherever they go. Nobody went out of their way to see the
Clippers come to town to face their home team.
Though they won't come out and say so -- the media wants to see the Lakers win. Countless deep-pocketed sponsors want the Lakers to win. Celebrities and politicians galore want the Lakers to win. And trust me, TV network executives want the Lakers to win. The ratings thing. All is right in the world when the Lakers win.
Yet now, despite the recent typical "blockbuster" free agent signings, the lights seem to be dimming rapidly on "showtime". Not only are they getting beat by teams they would have crushed in the past, they've become the "little brother" in their own building.
Who would have thunk it?
But it's real. The Clips are not only good, but they're young and will likely get better. Besides a couple superstars of their own, they've got that magical thing called chemistry -- and a great coach -- Vinny del Negro -- that doesn't care about the limelight. He just quietly goes about his game strategy and gets it done. The Lakers seem to have a bunch of divas that are all talented in their own way, but can't seem to come together and function as a unit. By most accounts, their new coach, Mark D-Antoni is a funny guy. The players love him, but he quickly took a back seat to the ever-present super-sized egos on his team, and they don't appear to have a clue what's coming next -- other than Kobe taking 40 or 50 shots a game, while clueless himself when it comes to playing any sort of defense. The Lakers seem to miss the Zen Master, Phil Jackson. He was a high-profile guy himself, who loved the limelight, but improbably, somehow it worked.
Bottom line? They need to decide how the court at Staples Center is going to look, and stick to it. And if they have that many locker rooms, they should donate a few to worthy causes. Like the Boy/Girl scouts, or the Humane Society. Lord knows there's plenty of dogs running around LA. Why not put them up in nice digs? How about the Campfire Girls? Who's going to notice one more fire in LA anyway? Perhaps the Rotary Club? No, that's for fired head coaches going to another team. They'll be getting a new locker room anyway. Bad idea. Forget that. The Lions' Club? Don't even get me started on that one. Still, it seems like there ought to be a better way to make use of all those facilities.
In the meantime, excuse me for being a wrong-thinker -- but I love it when Blake dunks on Kobe.
Friday, January 4, 2013
Jim Schwartz and jewelry
Detroit Lions' head coach Jim Schwartz is making a few extra bucks on the side these days. Now he's on TV commercials pitching the wares of a jewelry store.
Jewelry stores have lots of fancy stuff. There's blue stones and green stones, and red stones, and purple stones. You name the color, and they've got pricey stones available. Lots of gold and silver too -- to mount them on in an infinite variety of ways. Rings, bracelets, necklaces, anklets, earrings, even piercings. They've pretty well got something for everybody. If you've got the dough, they'll get you good to go. They even have black pearls and white gold. That doesn't make much sense. Do they paint that stuff or is it fake? Beats me. Besides, why would anybody want such things? Would you pay big bucks for a green labrador retriever or a shiny new fluorescent orange toilet?
Of course, they always have a bazillion or so diamonds. Sometimes I wonder where all these diamonds keep coming from. Most experts will tell you it takes at least tens of thousands of years under extreme pressure from deep in the earth for small pieces of carbon to become diamonds. It's not like they're a renewable resource. Then again, if one was to dig a hole about 100 miles deep in their backyard, plant some pieces of carbon, cover them up, and live to be maybe 50,000 years old, then one could have their very own diamond mine. Personally, I have enough trouble planting, and hoping those Yukon Gold spuds will grow in the garden, but I've only been waiting for 175 years, so perhaps I'm rushing things a bit. Did I forget to say my pic on this blog makes me look much younger than I really am? That Grover Cleveland was a hoot, I tell ya. The stories I could tell you about him when he used to stop by, but I digress.
Where was I? Oh yeah. Jim Schwartz in the jewelry store. Right.
That would seem to be an appropriate place for him. Perhaps he's looking for a couple more "diamonds in the rough". Lord knows he's had to deal with enough of them on the Lions over the last few years. Consider stomping, neck-wringing, and dope smoking. Then throw in car crashes, law suits, sucker-punching a teammate, and intentionally lining up in the wrong spot on the field. Add a heaping spoonful of a yappy veteran center that hasn't won anything since high school, and yells obscenities at his home town fans. Season to taste with the clown act of the week, with everything from special teams giving up multiple touchdowns, to a QB that said he wasn't trying to force the ball to a particular wide receiver, even though the guy had 5 defenders around him at the time.
Jimbo has had plenty of diamonds in the rough going on -- including himself. He once went berserk over a post-game handshake with the opposing coach, then later cost his team a touchdown, and likely a win, by throwing the red challenge flag at the wrong time. Afterwards he said he knew about that rule, but did it anyway. Confidence is a good thing. Belligerent ignorance is not. Cockiness, sometimes, but only if you're a winner. Career losers like Schwartz aren't supposed to be cocky, else they run the risk of being perceived as a buffoon. A very rich one, to be sure, but still an arrogant buffoon.
So besides the cha-ching Schwartz got from being a pitchman for that particular jewelry store, here's hoping they showed him what some highly polished finished products really look like.
Couldn't hurt.
The Lions? Owner William Clay Ford doesn't need diamond mines. He's got assembly lines passed down from his granddaddy Henry to keep him rolling in the dough. He married Martha Firestone, the daughter of Harvey, so they likely won't run out of tires anytime soon either.
But as far as a professional football team is concerned, William Clay might as well have planted those same Yukon Gold tater spuds I did.
He's been waiting for almost 50 years. I check in at about 175, as I mentioned before. Millions of years can pass, but it doesn't matter.
Neither will ever turn into diamonds. There's miracles and then there's miracles, but some things just ain't meant to be.....
Jewelry stores have lots of fancy stuff. There's blue stones and green stones, and red stones, and purple stones. You name the color, and they've got pricey stones available. Lots of gold and silver too -- to mount them on in an infinite variety of ways. Rings, bracelets, necklaces, anklets, earrings, even piercings. They've pretty well got something for everybody. If you've got the dough, they'll get you good to go. They even have black pearls and white gold. That doesn't make much sense. Do they paint that stuff or is it fake? Beats me. Besides, why would anybody want such things? Would you pay big bucks for a green labrador retriever or a shiny new fluorescent orange toilet?
Of course, they always have a bazillion or so diamonds. Sometimes I wonder where all these diamonds keep coming from. Most experts will tell you it takes at least tens of thousands of years under extreme pressure from deep in the earth for small pieces of carbon to become diamonds. It's not like they're a renewable resource. Then again, if one was to dig a hole about 100 miles deep in their backyard, plant some pieces of carbon, cover them up, and live to be maybe 50,000 years old, then one could have their very own diamond mine. Personally, I have enough trouble planting, and hoping those Yukon Gold spuds will grow in the garden, but I've only been waiting for 175 years, so perhaps I'm rushing things a bit. Did I forget to say my pic on this blog makes me look much younger than I really am? That Grover Cleveland was a hoot, I tell ya. The stories I could tell you about him when he used to stop by, but I digress.
Where was I? Oh yeah. Jim Schwartz in the jewelry store. Right.
That would seem to be an appropriate place for him. Perhaps he's looking for a couple more "diamonds in the rough". Lord knows he's had to deal with enough of them on the Lions over the last few years. Consider stomping, neck-wringing, and dope smoking. Then throw in car crashes, law suits, sucker-punching a teammate, and intentionally lining up in the wrong spot on the field. Add a heaping spoonful of a yappy veteran center that hasn't won anything since high school, and yells obscenities at his home town fans. Season to taste with the clown act of the week, with everything from special teams giving up multiple touchdowns, to a QB that said he wasn't trying to force the ball to a particular wide receiver, even though the guy had 5 defenders around him at the time.
Jimbo has had plenty of diamonds in the rough going on -- including himself. He once went berserk over a post-game handshake with the opposing coach, then later cost his team a touchdown, and likely a win, by throwing the red challenge flag at the wrong time. Afterwards he said he knew about that rule, but did it anyway. Confidence is a good thing. Belligerent ignorance is not. Cockiness, sometimes, but only if you're a winner. Career losers like Schwartz aren't supposed to be cocky, else they run the risk of being perceived as a buffoon. A very rich one, to be sure, but still an arrogant buffoon.
So besides the cha-ching Schwartz got from being a pitchman for that particular jewelry store, here's hoping they showed him what some highly polished finished products really look like.
Couldn't hurt.
The Lions? Owner William Clay Ford doesn't need diamond mines. He's got assembly lines passed down from his granddaddy Henry to keep him rolling in the dough. He married Martha Firestone, the daughter of Harvey, so they likely won't run out of tires anytime soon either.
But as far as a professional football team is concerned, William Clay might as well have planted those same Yukon Gold tater spuds I did.
He's been waiting for almost 50 years. I check in at about 175, as I mentioned before. Millions of years can pass, but it doesn't matter.
Neither will ever turn into diamonds. There's miracles and then there's miracles, but some things just ain't meant to be.....
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