After a 4 year hiatus, the Indy cars finally returned to the Detroit area. It was embarrassing.
Once upon a time, the Formula 1 series, far and away the most technologically advanced racing cars on the planet, came to the Motor City. They didn't tolerate it for very long. Low attendance, bad neighborhood, bad track, poor exposure, and other things drove them away. Think what you will of them, but greener pastures are greener pastures.
Then the Indy cars tried to fill the void. They suffered the same maladies, and eventually bailed too.
Likely due to Roger Penske, with Detroit roots, a Midas touch when it comes to all things business, and a titan in the world of Indy car racing, the Indy boys and girls were back racing on Belle Isle again. Penske had invested some $7 million of his money to spruce everything up on that island. Others had contributed fair sums of money as well.
The owners and drivers all said the right things before the race. They were overjoyed at going back to Detroit, the "birthplace" of the automobile, and let's not forget Chevrolet recently jumped back into the series providing racing engines that are every bit as powerful and reliable, if not more so, than the Honda motors which had dominated the series in recent years.
What could be better than Penske, Indy cars, and Chevrolet coming together again in Detroit for a glorious race?
Many years ago, the event took place on the streets of downtown Detroit, which would paralyze civilian traffic for several days. It was a logistical nightmare. Then somebody came up with bright idea to move it to Belle Isle. Great plan.
Even on Belle Isle, the course was less than optimal. It was (and is) narrow, making it extremely difficult for cars to pass each other, and also bumpy. Again, the drivers were politically correct about it, and said they looked forward to a "challenging" track.
Yet they all seemed to overlook the obvious. Welcome to Michigan, racing boys and girls -- the undisputed KING of potholes. Michigan has more potholes than it does trees. Maybe even blades of grass in some urban areas. Just because people poured millions into beautifying Belle Isle prior to the race -- it should have came as no great surprise that the racetrack would develop potholes. And did it ever. Big ones. The long, gaping, ditch variety you've likely seen in your neighborhood. The race had to be halted for a couple hours while repair crews attempted to fix the damage. Hard to say what the owners and drivers were thinking about during that time, but chances are they weren't exactly positive thoughts as to coming back to race in the Detroit area again.
At that, they tried to "patch" the raceway with some sort of quick-drying concrete mix. Clean out the old rubble, pour the new stuff in, smooth it out, and hope for the best.
There was a better way. After all, the race marshall was none other than Ndahmukong Suh, of the Detroit Lions. How he gets these gigs, given his reputation, is beyond me, but it's Detroit -- so anything's possible.
Most of us have seen city or county crews trying to fix potholes here or there. A big truck comes along and stops, a guy jumps off the back and shovels some of the asphalt stuff into the holes, and the truck moves on. They count on the cars and trucks running over it to pack it down. A couple weeks later it's like it never happened. It's a joke and a waste of time and taxpayers money. If you're going to do it -- at least do it right -- right?
That's where Suh could have came in handy. Forget the concrete and the guys out their with their trowels smoothing it out. Asphalt's a lot cheaper and quicker. All they needed to do was spread some of that same stuff our local boys in the orange trucks do on our roads, and get Suh back into his stomping mode. If he jumped up and down on it a couple times -- it would be as packed as it's ever going to get. Let's go racing.
But no matter how embarrassing that may have been on the Belle Isle racecourse, it still has it's advantages over the former course in the streets of downtown Detroit. These days, they might be lucky if they made it through the race without a few bullet holes in their vehicles, or even being car-jacked somewhere along the way.
Dress it up however you want, but Motown ain't what it used to be. More like Hotown, Godown, and as you're travelling through, don't Slowdown.
Monday, June 4, 2012
Saturday, June 2, 2012
Politically incorrect about ladies' softball
Though it doesn't get anywhere near the national attention and publicity of certain other sports in America, ladies' fast-pitch softball is pretty cool to watch. Their version of the college "World Series" in going on right now, and is being televised by an ESPN station. To steal a line from Michael Jordan, who was talking about an ill-fated venture into another sport at the time -- "These guys are good".
Indeed they are. All these girls are highly proficient at fielding and throwing the ball. When it comes to speed on the base paths, they zoom around like the "road-runner" from cartoons of yore. They're FAST.
Sure, most fast pitch softball games aren't exactly "slug-fests", because elite pitchers in that game dominate much more so than their counterparts in regular (mens') baseball. Yet like baseball, at the highest levels, the hitters are really good too. Sometimes a lot of runs will get scored.
Yes, a softball is a considerably larger target than a baseball to hit, but let's not forget the distance from the pitcher's mound to home plate is a lot closer, and softball hurlers have a variety of pitches and speeds that can rival most baseball pitchers. It's been said that a softball thrown at 70 MPH from 43 feet away (the college distance) is like trying to hit a major league fastball in the high 90's. From what I've seen, I think that's underestimated. The hitters in the girls' game have to be even quicker with their reflexes and bats. Check it out and decide for yourself.
So here's to the ladies' college World Series of softball. You are all incredibly talented and deserve much more praise and attention than you get. The end.
Well, not quite. This is where I turn off the main drag and venture down a seldom used, and potentially scary path. Yea, though I walk through the valley of political incorrectness, I shall fear no evil -- because sometimes it just is what it is.
Despite all the aforementioned skills -- I have a problem watching these games. To be blunt -- they just won't shut up.
Throughout the entire game, all the girls on both teams, particularly in the dugouts, act like it's a combination between a pep rally and cheerleader tryouts. On and on they'll go. The chatter never stops. Nuclear powered vocal cords. They'll chant and sing songs normally associated with 8 year olds at a sleep-over, camp-out, or maybe little league teams. These girls can vote, drive a car, serve in the military, and even bear children. So when they're playing softball at the highest collegiate level -- why do they revert back to acting like they're in the 3rd grade again? What's up with THAT?
Make it mandatory that they chew gum or tobacco like baseball players. Or spit sunflower seeds. Better yet, put a little "pinch" of snuff between their cheeks and gums, and this problem would be solved. Let them spit THAT in the dugouts or on the field. If all else fails, muzzle them. Tase them. Do something -- anything -- to keep them from flapping their gums while just spewing childish nonsense.
It's a fascinating game played by highly skilled athletes.
I just wish they'd act their age.
Indeed they are. All these girls are highly proficient at fielding and throwing the ball. When it comes to speed on the base paths, they zoom around like the "road-runner" from cartoons of yore. They're FAST.
Sure, most fast pitch softball games aren't exactly "slug-fests", because elite pitchers in that game dominate much more so than their counterparts in regular (mens') baseball. Yet like baseball, at the highest levels, the hitters are really good too. Sometimes a lot of runs will get scored.
Yes, a softball is a considerably larger target than a baseball to hit, but let's not forget the distance from the pitcher's mound to home plate is a lot closer, and softball hurlers have a variety of pitches and speeds that can rival most baseball pitchers. It's been said that a softball thrown at 70 MPH from 43 feet away (the college distance) is like trying to hit a major league fastball in the high 90's. From what I've seen, I think that's underestimated. The hitters in the girls' game have to be even quicker with their reflexes and bats. Check it out and decide for yourself.
So here's to the ladies' college World Series of softball. You are all incredibly talented and deserve much more praise and attention than you get. The end.
Well, not quite. This is where I turn off the main drag and venture down a seldom used, and potentially scary path. Yea, though I walk through the valley of political incorrectness, I shall fear no evil -- because sometimes it just is what it is.
Despite all the aforementioned skills -- I have a problem watching these games. To be blunt -- they just won't shut up.
Throughout the entire game, all the girls on both teams, particularly in the dugouts, act like it's a combination between a pep rally and cheerleader tryouts. On and on they'll go. The chatter never stops. Nuclear powered vocal cords. They'll chant and sing songs normally associated with 8 year olds at a sleep-over, camp-out, or maybe little league teams. These girls can vote, drive a car, serve in the military, and even bear children. So when they're playing softball at the highest collegiate level -- why do they revert back to acting like they're in the 3rd grade again? What's up with THAT?
Make it mandatory that they chew gum or tobacco like baseball players. Or spit sunflower seeds. Better yet, put a little "pinch" of snuff between their cheeks and gums, and this problem would be solved. Let them spit THAT in the dugouts or on the field. If all else fails, muzzle them. Tase them. Do something -- anything -- to keep them from flapping their gums while just spewing childish nonsense.
It's a fascinating game played by highly skilled athletes.
I just wish they'd act their age.
Friday, June 1, 2012
Roger Clemens -- with a twist
As most sports fans know, Roger Clemens has been on trial -- again. The trial is going on 2 months, some jurors have been dismissed for falling asleep, and no end appears to be in sight any time soon.
It's not about whether he took steroids, human growth hormone, or other "performance enhancing drugs", but rather whether he lied to Congress about this some 8 years ago. This is old news. Being charged with lying to Congress, who many think have historically been a pack of liars themselves, likely seems ludicrous to some. Yet they plow away with their prosecutors, spending untold millions of our tax dollars in the process. You'd likely agree that Congress wasting our hard earned money on some ridiculous projects is most definitely old news. But it is what it is.
When you get right down to it, the whole case is pretty simple. Brian McNamee, the "witness for the prosecution" and Clemens' former "trainer", has testified under oath that he injected Clemens a few times with PEDs. These alleged occasions happened either during Clinton's presidency, or George Jr.'s first term -- in other words -- quite a while back.
Clemens testified in front of Congress in 2004 that it never happened. Obviously, our legislators, in their infinite wisdom, think he lied -- hence the current charges and trial.
That's it.
All the other junk that's gone on in that courtroom is nothing but fluff -- distractions that are irrelevant.
So it all boils down to two things the jurors have to consider.
First, who do they want to believe? McNamee or Clemens?
And second, even if they believe McNamee, which would mean Clemens "used", do they really want to convict him for lying to other liars about it? Almost a decade later, does it really matter? Is it worth all this time and expense, or will the jurors feel insulted for having been dragged through this ordeal?
Hard to say, but here's a twist nobody else has mentioned yet.
Obviously, either Clemens, under oath before Congress way back when, or McNamee, recently under oath in federal court -- lied. One of them is guilty of perjury.
If Clemens is found guilty, the judge will sentence him to what the court deems appropriate. McNamee will carry on doing whatever he does these days.
But what if Clemens is acquitted on all charges? That would mean the jury deemed him to be truthful. Simple logic would dictate that makes McNamee guilty of perjury. Like flipping a coin, there has to be a winner and also a loser. It can't be both ways.
If Clemens wins, shouldn't McNamee be immediately arrested and tried for perjury himself? It would certainly be fodder for the reporters for the next several months, and the feds could blow another few million bucks of our tax money on silliness.
On second thought......
Nevermind, and please don't forward this to your local congressperson.
They might get together and actually do it.
It's not about whether he took steroids, human growth hormone, or other "performance enhancing drugs", but rather whether he lied to Congress about this some 8 years ago. This is old news. Being charged with lying to Congress, who many think have historically been a pack of liars themselves, likely seems ludicrous to some. Yet they plow away with their prosecutors, spending untold millions of our tax dollars in the process. You'd likely agree that Congress wasting our hard earned money on some ridiculous projects is most definitely old news. But it is what it is.
When you get right down to it, the whole case is pretty simple. Brian McNamee, the "witness for the prosecution" and Clemens' former "trainer", has testified under oath that he injected Clemens a few times with PEDs. These alleged occasions happened either during Clinton's presidency, or George Jr.'s first term -- in other words -- quite a while back.
Clemens testified in front of Congress in 2004 that it never happened. Obviously, our legislators, in their infinite wisdom, think he lied -- hence the current charges and trial.
That's it.
All the other junk that's gone on in that courtroom is nothing but fluff -- distractions that are irrelevant.
So it all boils down to two things the jurors have to consider.
First, who do they want to believe? McNamee or Clemens?
And second, even if they believe McNamee, which would mean Clemens "used", do they really want to convict him for lying to other liars about it? Almost a decade later, does it really matter? Is it worth all this time and expense, or will the jurors feel insulted for having been dragged through this ordeal?
Hard to say, but here's a twist nobody else has mentioned yet.
Obviously, either Clemens, under oath before Congress way back when, or McNamee, recently under oath in federal court -- lied. One of them is guilty of perjury.
If Clemens is found guilty, the judge will sentence him to what the court deems appropriate. McNamee will carry on doing whatever he does these days.
But what if Clemens is acquitted on all charges? That would mean the jury deemed him to be truthful. Simple logic would dictate that makes McNamee guilty of perjury. Like flipping a coin, there has to be a winner and also a loser. It can't be both ways.
If Clemens wins, shouldn't McNamee be immediately arrested and tried for perjury himself? It would certainly be fodder for the reporters for the next several months, and the feds could blow another few million bucks of our tax money on silliness.
On second thought......
Nevermind, and please don't forward this to your local congressperson.
They might get together and actually do it.
The Scripps National Spelling Bee
Before you say I'm out of bounds on this topic because it has nothing to do with sports, I will merely state the Finals were televised by ESPN's flagship station. Obviously the network executives think it qualifies as such, and probably countless millions the world over watched the contest. So there. Onward.
To likely no one's great surprise, a 14 year old girl named Snigdha Nandipati, of Indian (the Asian variety) heritage, came out on top. I'm not so good at spelling and it will be a minor miracle if I get through this article without screwing something up. Hope I got her name right.
Can Indian kids spell? Are you kidding? Can Kenyans run marathons? Can the Chinese play ping-pong? Is Usain Bolt fast? Does Charles Barkley have a classic golf swing? Hmmm. Nah, forget that last one.
At any rate, this is the 10 time in the last 14 years a kid of Indian heritage has won the spelling bee. It would seem that while American children are busy texting, tweeting, face-booking, playing video games, and dreaming of being the next superstar in various sports -- the Indian children are studying. Kids devoting hours everyday to their passion to learn. Imagine that.
Snigdha speaks fluent Teluga, which is a language in southeastern India, and aspires to someday possibly become a neurosurgeon. As smart as that little girl is, she'll likely get a full ride scholarship through college and maybe even med school, right here in the USA. I wonder if when she's finely ready to wield the scalpel on people's heads and make the big bucks, if she'll pull a Lebron and "take her talents" elsewhere, like in back to India. Could happen.
Snigdha's winning word was "guetapens", which is some sort of snare or trap, maybe like what the Nashville Predators did to the Detroit Red Wings in the playoffs. The runner-up lost out by misspelling the word "schwarmerei", which is unbridled enthusiasm -- kinda like some sports beat reporters when it comes to the team they're covering. Betcha any of them could have spelled "Kool-Aid".
Yet this spelling bee has gotten out of control. Every contestant on every word drags it on way too long. The person presenting the words clearly enunciates it, gives a definition, and says the word again. That should be good enough. But no, the kids want to know whether it's a noun, verb, adjective, adverb, etc. Then they ask from which language the word was derived. Then they want to hear the whole thing again. Even Snigdha said she already knew how to spell the winning word when it was first presented, but asked all the questions anyway. If I was a judge I'd put an end to this nonsense. Here's what I'd say: "I just clearly pronounced the word, gave you a definition, and pronounced it again. Now S-P-E-L-L the damn thing. Don't make me come up there on stage and cuff you up the side of your nerdy egghead. Let's GO".
That might spice it up a tad. And why not throw a little controversy into the whole thing? Every other sport seems to have it in one way or the other. When it gets down to the end where the kids are having to spell ridiculously hard words that most of us have never even heard of -- why not throw in a random blooper? After a word like "schwarmerei", ask the next kid to spell "cat", a domestic feline animal that purrs and goes potty in a litter box. Sure it would be unfair, but it would also be hilarious. The crowd in attendance would gasp, millions the world over would think the "fix" was in, scribes and talking heads would go berserk, and whoever put the word "cat" into the contest might wind up testifying before a few Senators on Capitol Hill.
Maybe it could even be arranged to have a few kids and/or their families get into the "octagon" for some cage grudge matches. A round-robin tournament with millions of cha-chings at $49.95 on pay-per-view. The possibilities are endless. After all, it's the American way.
Or maybe someday a lot of bright kids will stop pressing buttons, or thinking they're going to be the next Lebron James or Tom Brady. For 99.99999% of them, it ain't gonna happen. So many of them fall into the "guetapens" -- the trap. A dream future that has no chance of ever becoming reality.
They might even consider studying as hard as the contestants on the Scripps Spelling Bee do. Imagine that.
Chances are all those kids will go far in their various fields of endeavor.
To likely no one's great surprise, a 14 year old girl named Snigdha Nandipati, of Indian (the Asian variety) heritage, came out on top. I'm not so good at spelling and it will be a minor miracle if I get through this article without screwing something up. Hope I got her name right.
Can Indian kids spell? Are you kidding? Can Kenyans run marathons? Can the Chinese play ping-pong? Is Usain Bolt fast? Does Charles Barkley have a classic golf swing? Hmmm. Nah, forget that last one.
At any rate, this is the 10 time in the last 14 years a kid of Indian heritage has won the spelling bee. It would seem that while American children are busy texting, tweeting, face-booking, playing video games, and dreaming of being the next superstar in various sports -- the Indian children are studying. Kids devoting hours everyday to their passion to learn. Imagine that.
Snigdha speaks fluent Teluga, which is a language in southeastern India, and aspires to someday possibly become a neurosurgeon. As smart as that little girl is, she'll likely get a full ride scholarship through college and maybe even med school, right here in the USA. I wonder if when she's finely ready to wield the scalpel on people's heads and make the big bucks, if she'll pull a Lebron and "take her talents" elsewhere, like in back to India. Could happen.
Snigdha's winning word was "guetapens", which is some sort of snare or trap, maybe like what the Nashville Predators did to the Detroit Red Wings in the playoffs. The runner-up lost out by misspelling the word "schwarmerei", which is unbridled enthusiasm -- kinda like some sports beat reporters when it comes to the team they're covering. Betcha any of them could have spelled "Kool-Aid".
Yet this spelling bee has gotten out of control. Every contestant on every word drags it on way too long. The person presenting the words clearly enunciates it, gives a definition, and says the word again. That should be good enough. But no, the kids want to know whether it's a noun, verb, adjective, adverb, etc. Then they ask from which language the word was derived. Then they want to hear the whole thing again. Even Snigdha said she already knew how to spell the winning word when it was first presented, but asked all the questions anyway. If I was a judge I'd put an end to this nonsense. Here's what I'd say: "I just clearly pronounced the word, gave you a definition, and pronounced it again. Now S-P-E-L-L the damn thing. Don't make me come up there on stage and cuff you up the side of your nerdy egghead. Let's GO".
That might spice it up a tad. And why not throw a little controversy into the whole thing? Every other sport seems to have it in one way or the other. When it gets down to the end where the kids are having to spell ridiculously hard words that most of us have never even heard of -- why not throw in a random blooper? After a word like "schwarmerei", ask the next kid to spell "cat", a domestic feline animal that purrs and goes potty in a litter box. Sure it would be unfair, but it would also be hilarious. The crowd in attendance would gasp, millions the world over would think the "fix" was in, scribes and talking heads would go berserk, and whoever put the word "cat" into the contest might wind up testifying before a few Senators on Capitol Hill.
Maybe it could even be arranged to have a few kids and/or their families get into the "octagon" for some cage grudge matches. A round-robin tournament with millions of cha-chings at $49.95 on pay-per-view. The possibilities are endless. After all, it's the American way.
Or maybe someday a lot of bright kids will stop pressing buttons, or thinking they're going to be the next Lebron James or Tom Brady. For 99.99999% of them, it ain't gonna happen. So many of them fall into the "guetapens" -- the trap. A dream future that has no chance of ever becoming reality.
They might even consider studying as hard as the contestants on the Scripps Spelling Bee do. Imagine that.
Chances are all those kids will go far in their various fields of endeavor.
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Amazing things
I see the KKK is back and has reared their pretty heads again. No, not THOSE guys, but the Kardashians. One of them (Kerplunk?) said she wanted out of the limelight. This while appearing on Jay Leno's show with her sisters (Kaput and Kindapregnant?) and hyping their next TV project. Amazing.
But this is supposed to be about sports. Right.
In the NHL, the LA Kings just knocked off the Devils in New Jersey in Game 1 of the Stanley Cup Finals. The Kings have now won 9 games on the "road" in the playoffs. To get to the Finals, any team has to have won 12 games and this is LA's 13th win. So the Kings have won 9 road games and only 4 at home to get where they are? Can that be right? If so -- amazing.
A couple weeks have gone by and nary a mention of Tiger Woods. Very amazing.
Serena Williams, after compiling a 46-0 record in the opening rounds of major tennis tournaments, got whupped by the 111th ranked player in the world in the first round of the French Open. Amazing. Further, she didn't resort to her usual multitude of excuses which might be anything from bad calls, to a tummy ache, to a sore "pick a body part", to maybe a solar eclipse that could be viewed if one happened to be standing on the planet Jupiter. She came up with some beauties over the years, but this time she admitted she didn't play well. Truly amazing.
Upon Niklaus Lidstrom of the Detroit Red Wings announcing his retirement after a long and glorious career, some local pundits can hardly wait to call him the all-time best player the Wings ever had. Forget about Gordie Howe, Stever Yzerman and others. These are the same people that are already referring to Justin Verlander of the Detroit Tigers as the best all-time pitcher the Tigers ever had. Nevermind he only needs another 140 wins or so to equal Jack Morris, or a measly 1600 more strikeouts to equal Mickey Lolich, to mention just a couple. JV has been a Detroit Tiger for 8 years, five of them good, and three not so good. But he won the American League Cy Young and MVP last year, has his own "fathead" and breakfast cereal, so he must be the best. Methinks such pundits have been swigging the home town Koolaid again. Maybe not so amazing.
To my knowledge, no member of the Detroit Lions has been arrested in the past week. Somewhat amazing. Head coach Jim Schwartz certainly knows pro-football, but he leaves an objective person to wonder what kind of control he has over his team. Given the infamous "Suh Stomp", players slugging each other in practice, and a few other incidents, either on or off the field, perhaps Schwartz has given the term "game warden" a whole new meaning. Amazing. Lions' owner William Clay Ford still apparently doesn't have a clue as to what's going on. Not so amazing.
Blake Griffin of the Los Angeles Clippers is an incredibly talented player. He's got a 4-year contract worth $42 million dollars. No matter how you slice it or dice it -- that's an amazing amount of money to the average working stiff. Yet athletes never seem to have enough. They want endorsements that will pay them even more. Someone in Griffin's position likely has many choices as to what product(s) to endorse. So why does an American pro basketball player seem so smug while hyping cars (KIA) built in South Korea? Hasn't he ever heard of GM, Ford, and Chrysler? Bentleys, Beemers, and maybe a Porcshe or Fiat I can believe, but does anybody really think he tools around town in a KIA, or even has one parked in his garage somewhere? If so, they're amazingly gullible.
Considering a lot of other things going on in sports, maybe the KKK isn't so bad after all.
Amazing.
But this is supposed to be about sports. Right.
In the NHL, the LA Kings just knocked off the Devils in New Jersey in Game 1 of the Stanley Cup Finals. The Kings have now won 9 games on the "road" in the playoffs. To get to the Finals, any team has to have won 12 games and this is LA's 13th win. So the Kings have won 9 road games and only 4 at home to get where they are? Can that be right? If so -- amazing.
A couple weeks have gone by and nary a mention of Tiger Woods. Very amazing.
Serena Williams, after compiling a 46-0 record in the opening rounds of major tennis tournaments, got whupped by the 111th ranked player in the world in the first round of the French Open. Amazing. Further, she didn't resort to her usual multitude of excuses which might be anything from bad calls, to a tummy ache, to a sore "pick a body part", to maybe a solar eclipse that could be viewed if one happened to be standing on the planet Jupiter. She came up with some beauties over the years, but this time she admitted she didn't play well. Truly amazing.
Upon Niklaus Lidstrom of the Detroit Red Wings announcing his retirement after a long and glorious career, some local pundits can hardly wait to call him the all-time best player the Wings ever had. Forget about Gordie Howe, Stever Yzerman and others. These are the same people that are already referring to Justin Verlander of the Detroit Tigers as the best all-time pitcher the Tigers ever had. Nevermind he only needs another 140 wins or so to equal Jack Morris, or a measly 1600 more strikeouts to equal Mickey Lolich, to mention just a couple. JV has been a Detroit Tiger for 8 years, five of them good, and three not so good. But he won the American League Cy Young and MVP last year, has his own "fathead" and breakfast cereal, so he must be the best. Methinks such pundits have been swigging the home town Koolaid again. Maybe not so amazing.
To my knowledge, no member of the Detroit Lions has been arrested in the past week. Somewhat amazing. Head coach Jim Schwartz certainly knows pro-football, but he leaves an objective person to wonder what kind of control he has over his team. Given the infamous "Suh Stomp", players slugging each other in practice, and a few other incidents, either on or off the field, perhaps Schwartz has given the term "game warden" a whole new meaning. Amazing. Lions' owner William Clay Ford still apparently doesn't have a clue as to what's going on. Not so amazing.
Blake Griffin of the Los Angeles Clippers is an incredibly talented player. He's got a 4-year contract worth $42 million dollars. No matter how you slice it or dice it -- that's an amazing amount of money to the average working stiff. Yet athletes never seem to have enough. They want endorsements that will pay them even more. Someone in Griffin's position likely has many choices as to what product(s) to endorse. So why does an American pro basketball player seem so smug while hyping cars (KIA) built in South Korea? Hasn't he ever heard of GM, Ford, and Chrysler? Bentleys, Beemers, and maybe a Porcshe or Fiat I can believe, but does anybody really think he tools around town in a KIA, or even has one parked in his garage somewhere? If so, they're amazingly gullible.
Considering a lot of other things going on in sports, maybe the KKK isn't so bad after all.
Amazing.
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
The dumbest rule in sports
There's some really dumb rules in sports. Please jump in with your own suggestions if you please, but here's a few that I offer.
In hockey, whacking a guy in the face with a stick, as long as it doesn't draw blood, will result in the same degree of penalty as flipping the puck into the crowd. High sticking and delay of game are both 2 minute minors. That doesn't seem right.
In some car races, yellow caution flags are predetermined before the contest even starts. Maybe that has to do with checking out the track. But if they were worried about that, than they shouldn't be racing on it in the first place. Dumb.
In golf, one will get a 2 stroke penalty for not replacing the ball in exactly the same place on the green after it's been "marked". Yet one will only incur a 1 stroke penalty for hitting the same ball into the middle of a lake or deep into the woods. Evidently, missing by a couple inches is twice as important as missing by 40-50 yards. Dumb.
Tennis has a weird scoring system. Zero is love. 1 is 15. 2 is 30. 3 is 40. Who came up with this nonsense anyway? Dumb.
Across the spectrum of sports, head coaches and managers can be seen in a variety of clothing as they attend games. Everything from suits and ties to hoodies. Some major league baseball managers wear a uniform with a number on the back, and some don't. Jim Leyland, of the Detroit Tigers, appears to prefer wearing his team pajamas while on the field. You'd think the various commissioners of these sports would lay out a dress code for the guys running teams much like they do for the players, but I guess not. Seems dumb.
Yet I would maintain that nowhere is there a dumber rule than in major league baseball.
It has to do with yellow lines. Some major league ball parks have them -- and some don't. I'm referring to the yellow lines sometimes found at the top of outfield walls. If a batted ball goes over the wall in "fair" territory, then it's a home run. Most would think that if the same batted ball hits the wall, then it's up to the outfielder(s) to play it the best they can, while the batter perhaps gets a double, a triple, and in rare cases, if the ball caroms away from the fielders and the batter is speedy enough, maybe even an "inside-the-park" home run. If the ball hits the wall and bounces back, it's in play, right? Not so fast.
For some reason that appears to be known only to God and baseball commissioner Bud Selig, there are yellow lines at the top of some ball park outfield walls. If the ball hits the yellow line and bounces back -- it's a home run. How dumb is that? Granted, every major league baseball park has it's own unique parameters when it comes to the "fences", but c'mon. What's the point in the yellow lines? If they want that ball to be a home run, lower the walls a foot. Or bring the fences in. The Detroit Tigers did just that at Comerica Park in left field. When the stadium was brand new, it took quite a "poke" to hit a homer to left field. What would normally be a "round-tripper" in most other stadiums was just a long out in Detroit. To their credit, the Tigers organization realized the initial design blunder, reconfigured the bullpens, and brought the fence in by over 20 feet. But even the Tigers organization, as bumbling as they can be at times, ever had a "yellow line" on an outfield wall, to my knowledge.
I never noticed it until earlier today, but the dumbest rule of them all has to be at Fenway Park, home of the Boston Red Sox. Most everybody knows that Fenway features the "green monster" wall in left field. It stands a little over 37 feet tall. I suggest anybody reading this to Google "dimensions of Fenway Park", and after looking at an overview, wondering what the architect, James McLaughlin, could possibly have been thinking way back in 1911. The whole lay-out, at least these days, seems kind of dumb, but hey, such places as Fenway, and Wrigley Field in Chicago, forever the home of the Cubs, ivy-covered walls and all, should merit a great deal of respect.
Nevertheless, Fenway Park should get the gold for a dumb rule. They seem to have trumped the yellow lines at the top of walls in other parks. On the very edge of the "green monster" towards "centerfield" is a yellow line. And it's VERTICAL. A ball hit an inch to the left of the yellow line bounces off the same 37 foot wall and is in play. A ball hit an inch to the right of that line will drop into the centerfield stands amongst the fans, where the wall in only maybe 15 feet high. But if the ball hits the magic yellow line -- it's a home run. How incredibly stupid is that?
I don't know, but the above mentioned Jim Leyland somehow saw fit to walk onto the field in his PJ's and challenge a ball hit by one of his players that bounced back, but maybe, just MAYBE, it hit the yellow line, for a home run.
Nevermind the 30,000+ fans in attendance, that paid mega-bucks to be there. Let them twiddle their thumbs, or maybe go buy another $8 draft beer that's probably worth about a quarter. The entire crew of umpires stopped everything, and disappeared through a dugout to their hallowed " men in black" room, where presumably video techs were busy showing all four of these guys several different replays of whether a baseball hit an arbitrary yellow line or not in the field of play.
That goes way beyond dumb.
That's just stupid.
In hockey, whacking a guy in the face with a stick, as long as it doesn't draw blood, will result in the same degree of penalty as flipping the puck into the crowd. High sticking and delay of game are both 2 minute minors. That doesn't seem right.
In some car races, yellow caution flags are predetermined before the contest even starts. Maybe that has to do with checking out the track. But if they were worried about that, than they shouldn't be racing on it in the first place. Dumb.
In golf, one will get a 2 stroke penalty for not replacing the ball in exactly the same place on the green after it's been "marked". Yet one will only incur a 1 stroke penalty for hitting the same ball into the middle of a lake or deep into the woods. Evidently, missing by a couple inches is twice as important as missing by 40-50 yards. Dumb.
Tennis has a weird scoring system. Zero is love. 1 is 15. 2 is 30. 3 is 40. Who came up with this nonsense anyway? Dumb.
Across the spectrum of sports, head coaches and managers can be seen in a variety of clothing as they attend games. Everything from suits and ties to hoodies. Some major league baseball managers wear a uniform with a number on the back, and some don't. Jim Leyland, of the Detroit Tigers, appears to prefer wearing his team pajamas while on the field. You'd think the various commissioners of these sports would lay out a dress code for the guys running teams much like they do for the players, but I guess not. Seems dumb.
Yet I would maintain that nowhere is there a dumber rule than in major league baseball.
It has to do with yellow lines. Some major league ball parks have them -- and some don't. I'm referring to the yellow lines sometimes found at the top of outfield walls. If a batted ball goes over the wall in "fair" territory, then it's a home run. Most would think that if the same batted ball hits the wall, then it's up to the outfielder(s) to play it the best they can, while the batter perhaps gets a double, a triple, and in rare cases, if the ball caroms away from the fielders and the batter is speedy enough, maybe even an "inside-the-park" home run. If the ball hits the wall and bounces back, it's in play, right? Not so fast.
For some reason that appears to be known only to God and baseball commissioner Bud Selig, there are yellow lines at the top of some ball park outfield walls. If the ball hits the yellow line and bounces back -- it's a home run. How dumb is that? Granted, every major league baseball park has it's own unique parameters when it comes to the "fences", but c'mon. What's the point in the yellow lines? If they want that ball to be a home run, lower the walls a foot. Or bring the fences in. The Detroit Tigers did just that at Comerica Park in left field. When the stadium was brand new, it took quite a "poke" to hit a homer to left field. What would normally be a "round-tripper" in most other stadiums was just a long out in Detroit. To their credit, the Tigers organization realized the initial design blunder, reconfigured the bullpens, and brought the fence in by over 20 feet. But even the Tigers organization, as bumbling as they can be at times, ever had a "yellow line" on an outfield wall, to my knowledge.
I never noticed it until earlier today, but the dumbest rule of them all has to be at Fenway Park, home of the Boston Red Sox. Most everybody knows that Fenway features the "green monster" wall in left field. It stands a little over 37 feet tall. I suggest anybody reading this to Google "dimensions of Fenway Park", and after looking at an overview, wondering what the architect, James McLaughlin, could possibly have been thinking way back in 1911. The whole lay-out, at least these days, seems kind of dumb, but hey, such places as Fenway, and Wrigley Field in Chicago, forever the home of the Cubs, ivy-covered walls and all, should merit a great deal of respect.
Nevertheless, Fenway Park should get the gold for a dumb rule. They seem to have trumped the yellow lines at the top of walls in other parks. On the very edge of the "green monster" towards "centerfield" is a yellow line. And it's VERTICAL. A ball hit an inch to the left of the yellow line bounces off the same 37 foot wall and is in play. A ball hit an inch to the right of that line will drop into the centerfield stands amongst the fans, where the wall in only maybe 15 feet high. But if the ball hits the magic yellow line -- it's a home run. How incredibly stupid is that?
I don't know, but the above mentioned Jim Leyland somehow saw fit to walk onto the field in his PJ's and challenge a ball hit by one of his players that bounced back, but maybe, just MAYBE, it hit the yellow line, for a home run.
Nevermind the 30,000+ fans in attendance, that paid mega-bucks to be there. Let them twiddle their thumbs, or maybe go buy another $8 draft beer that's probably worth about a quarter. The entire crew of umpires stopped everything, and disappeared through a dugout to their hallowed " men in black" room, where presumably video techs were busy showing all four of these guys several different replays of whether a baseball hit an arbitrary yellow line or not in the field of play.
That goes way beyond dumb.
That's just stupid.
Saturday, May 26, 2012
Pole dancing
Believe it or not, a movement is underway to make pole dancing an Olympic sport in 2016.
Most American males, including myself, and probably a lot of ladies, have seen those girls in action sometime in their life. Up and down the pole they'll go, twisting, turning, right side up, upside down, and contorting themselves into some very provocative poses, all while scantily dressed. The crowd cheers and normally tips them generously when their routine is done. That's all well and good if one is into that sort of entertainment.
But I never thought I'd see the day that it could become an Olympic sport. Let's look at where this might go.....
First, would this be a woman only sport? I certainly hope so. The thought of guys doing this sort of thing -- well -- not only do I support Title IX, but think an exclusionary clause should be added on. Men should NOT be allowed to participate in some sports.
If pole dancing becomes an Olympic event, it would have repercussions the world over. Think about it. Most countries would be sending a pole dancing team to the Olympics. You might say, "You're crazy, Leach, nobody would go for that". To that I would respond, "Oh yeah, then how do you explain a country like Jamaica, with no snow or ice -- ever -- sending a bobsled team, that, by the way, beat the Americans?"
A few of the more "conservative" countries when it comes to women, such as some in the Middle East, might not know exactly what to do about this. Would they insist on their lady contestants keeping their faces veiled? Fine by me. Veils have always been sultry. Bring it on. Besides, nobody looks at their faces anyway.
What would be the minimum age to participate, and would some countries try to cheat by sending girls "under the limit" that could better contort themselves? None of that matters. There should only be one rule. The participants must have cleavage. That would eliminate the 11 and 12 year olds. You might further say, "Wait a minute, some adult women never develop that". True, but tough. Let them play soccer, volleyball, or any number of other sports -- but they should not, repeat NOT, be allowed on the pole. When male viewers the world over tune in, they would want to be entertained watching this sport. Cleavage entertains. Stick girls do not.
And get rid of the blood and urine tests for this sport only. If there was ever a place for performance enhancing drugs -- this would be it.
This sport could get a whole lot more interesting, especially to the men, than synchronized swimming ever was. All we get to see there is girls upside down in the water twirling around and moving their legs in unison. Nobody even knows what they look like. As highly conditioned athletes, perhaps they could become multi-dimensional and enter another event. Get out of the pool and jump on the pole. That raises yet another question. Could there be synchronized team pole dancing? The possibilities are endless.
Some might argue that many "garden-variety" pole dancers have been "digging" for the "gold" for years.
This would give them a chance to actually GO for it.
And why not? It would be a heck of a lot more entertaining than, say, the biathlon. But that's held in the Winter Olympics and pole dancing would be in the Summer Olympics? Says who?
Put them outside in the cold and snow while they're competing on the poles.
That would likely raise yet another couple interesting "points".
I'm beginning to like this idea.
Most American males, including myself, and probably a lot of ladies, have seen those girls in action sometime in their life. Up and down the pole they'll go, twisting, turning, right side up, upside down, and contorting themselves into some very provocative poses, all while scantily dressed. The crowd cheers and normally tips them generously when their routine is done. That's all well and good if one is into that sort of entertainment.
But I never thought I'd see the day that it could become an Olympic sport. Let's look at where this might go.....
First, would this be a woman only sport? I certainly hope so. The thought of guys doing this sort of thing -- well -- not only do I support Title IX, but think an exclusionary clause should be added on. Men should NOT be allowed to participate in some sports.
If pole dancing becomes an Olympic event, it would have repercussions the world over. Think about it. Most countries would be sending a pole dancing team to the Olympics. You might say, "You're crazy, Leach, nobody would go for that". To that I would respond, "Oh yeah, then how do you explain a country like Jamaica, with no snow or ice -- ever -- sending a bobsled team, that, by the way, beat the Americans?"
A few of the more "conservative" countries when it comes to women, such as some in the Middle East, might not know exactly what to do about this. Would they insist on their lady contestants keeping their faces veiled? Fine by me. Veils have always been sultry. Bring it on. Besides, nobody looks at their faces anyway.
What would be the minimum age to participate, and would some countries try to cheat by sending girls "under the limit" that could better contort themselves? None of that matters. There should only be one rule. The participants must have cleavage. That would eliminate the 11 and 12 year olds. You might further say, "Wait a minute, some adult women never develop that". True, but tough. Let them play soccer, volleyball, or any number of other sports -- but they should not, repeat NOT, be allowed on the pole. When male viewers the world over tune in, they would want to be entertained watching this sport. Cleavage entertains. Stick girls do not.
And get rid of the blood and urine tests for this sport only. If there was ever a place for performance enhancing drugs -- this would be it.
This sport could get a whole lot more interesting, especially to the men, than synchronized swimming ever was. All we get to see there is girls upside down in the water twirling around and moving their legs in unison. Nobody even knows what they look like. As highly conditioned athletes, perhaps they could become multi-dimensional and enter another event. Get out of the pool and jump on the pole. That raises yet another question. Could there be synchronized team pole dancing? The possibilities are endless.
Some might argue that many "garden-variety" pole dancers have been "digging" for the "gold" for years.
This would give them a chance to actually GO for it.
And why not? It would be a heck of a lot more entertaining than, say, the biathlon. But that's held in the Winter Olympics and pole dancing would be in the Summer Olympics? Says who?
Put them outside in the cold and snow while they're competing on the poles.
That would likely raise yet another couple interesting "points".
I'm beginning to like this idea.
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