Bowl games and the Boss

Recently, yours truly shot his editor an email with my take on the upcoming college football national championship playoffs. I like to think I'm pretty good at keeping up with the sports scene, but this guy is all over it. Maybe that's why he makes the big bucks and I don't. It follows.

I considered using the following as a blog post, and might still yet. But then I thought -- what the hell -- I haven't pestered a certain bacon and cheese omelet scarfing sports editor in a while. So why not? Onward. 

Question: How can a team be ranked #3 going in, win their last game by 52 points, and drop three spots in the polls to fall out of national playoff contention?

My answer: Follow the money. While Condy and her committee can bluster all they want about "bodies of work", tell me they weren't acutely aware (if not influenced) by the almighty network TV executives, trying to get the ultimate bang for ad bucks -- and I'll tell you I don't believe it. Had it been, say, Texas, instead of TCU in the same predicament, I suspect things would have turned out a bit differently. Yes/no?  

Nevertheless, time to weigh in on the games. 

The Sugar Bowl. Though Bama seemed to be vulnerable earlier in the year, methinks they've regained their junkyard dog mentality. Plus, they're loaded with talent and depth across the board. Kudos to OSU for what they've accomplished with a second, and then third string quarterback. The beatdown of MSU was impressive enough, and the absolute 59-0 slaughter of a very good Wisconsin team in the conference championship game was eye-popping. But the Tide will basically have regional home field advantage and I foresee Cardale Jones, in just his second start, having a long and brutal day against the Bama defense. Haven't seen the spread, but I'd think Bama would be favored by a touchdown or so (it's now 10 points). And I think they cover. 

The Rose Bowl. Home field advantage goes to Oregon. The Ducks are definitely a speedy bunch and have a likely Heisman winning QB. In the meantime, FSU is tough to figure out. They're reigning national champs, the only undefeated team in the field, yet somehow dropped from a pre-season #1 to #3. Thing is, outside the Tallahassee area, most people want to see these guys get knocked off. Probably because of the on-going rumblings concerning Jameis Winston's alleged misdeeds of the past. I have no idea whether such allegations are true, but Winston and the 'Noles haven't lost a game since he set foot on campus two years ago. Funny though, how Winston has recently had a hearing in front of university officials regarding student misconduct, but no word yet on their decision. Well, of course not. They'll make sure they "deliberate" for a few weeks. Even if they already think he's guilty, they're not about to bounce/suspend their star QB until the playoffs are over. Who's kidding who? FSU has escaped a few close calls with second half rallies, but I think in Pasadena, their winning streak comes to an end. Instead of the 'Noles wearing somebody else out, I think the Ducks wear THEM out. Again, no idea about the point spread, but I'd guess 3 or 4 in favor of Oregon (the Ducks are currently favored by nine.) 

So yours truly has Alabama and Oregon meeting for the national championship. 

And what say you?

 

Roger Goodell's power play

Recently, the High Lord and Commissioner of the National Football League handed down a new set of rules regarding player misconduct. This was done in conjunction with the unanimous approval of all 32 NFL franchise owners. A boffo victory for the Commish, the teams, and mankind in general has taken another step forward -- right?

Not so fast. Turns out, there's that pesky bunch sometimes referred to as the actual players, and they have a union to represent them. It further turns out that neither the union nor players have any idea what these new rules are. They weren't consulted.

And that's going to be a problem.

Like another certain "chief executive" has learned (or soon will), attempting to rule from on high by fiat, especially when they're "contractually" bound to involve others in the process, is likely to highly incense such others. In other words, there's going to be some serious blowback.

Granted, Goodell's policy on player misconduct has been all over the map. It definitely needed clarifying. Few would doubt that some recent cases of "misconduct", Ray Rice in particular, have heightened awareness amongst the public.

But even that case was botched by Goodell. First it was a 2 game suspension. "Upon further review" (see the infamous elevator video), the suspension became "indefinite". Roger the dodger claims that during all those months, when everybody and their uncle had access to the tape, it was somehow denied to the NFL offices, hence him changing Rice's penalty when he finally saw it. As even more information continues to leak out, particularly emails, it appears the good Commish hasn't been exactly forthcoming. To boot, such an action by Rice, even with video, would normally result in a 6 game suspension, per the Collective Bargaining Agreement. So again, Goodell and his minions were all over the map on this case. It's little wonder a neutral arbitrator finally kicked the league to the curb and reinstated Rice. If management is making up the rules as they go along, does it sound logical, much less fair, they should be allowed to arbitrarily impose them upon the workers, depending on which way the politically correct wind is blowing at the time? I think not, especially when said employees are represented by a union.

Goodell and the owners can "legislate" all the new rules they want, but until the players and their union sign off on them, it's little more than sound bytes and worthless pieces of paper. Certainly not binding. And as mentioned above, the people these new rules apply to have yet to see them, let alone having been consulted with along the way.

The owners likely don't care. For the most part, they're reclusive billionaires that hire a "front office" to tend to the day-to-day operations of their high-priced toy. But Roger Goodell is their collective front man, and he should know better.

When a management/union/contract exists, you can't just start changing things unless they are negotiated with, and agreed to, by the other side. No neutral arbitrator or judge in the land would uphold such heavy-handed shenanigans. Worse yet, by attempting to do so, it poisons the well in future negotiations. People are going to be pissed, and rightfully so.

For supposedly being such a smart guy, Goodell can sure act dumb sometimes. This latest gambit is going to come back to bite him in his blond, blue-eyed posterior.

But maybe this is what happens when a guy makes $11.6 million in 2011, $29.5 million in 2012, north of $44 million in 2013, and nobody knows what his final figure will be for the 2014 season. At that rate, $60 million certainly isn't out of the question. Even if $64 million, do the math. That's two million bucks per owner. Chump change. They pay offensive linemen you've never heard of more than that every year.

Goodell has the poshest of offices, tailored suits, flies on deluxe private jets, stays in 5 star hotels, and has a legion of assistants and lawyers at his disposal. And we're in an uproar about raising the minimum hourly wage a buck or two per hour for people that work their butts off in sweat shops every day catering to our whims? Something is wrong with this picture.

No wonder he thinks he's above it all.

But it's only the opening salvo of the latest round. The union (and players) will weigh in eventually, once they learn what the new rules are supposed to be. And that will likely get ugly.

Wouldn't it have been a lot simpler, not to mention legal, logical, and fair to include them in the process in the first place?

Detroit Tigers. The window is closing

Much was made of the Detroit Tigers last year. They supposedly had the best starting pitching rotation in all of baseball. Former MVP and Triple Crown winner Miguel Cabrera remained an absolute brute with a bat in his hands.

Victor Martinez had a career year with the bat as well, and the Tigers recently resigned him. J.D. Martinez, who was cut by the lowly Houston Astros, showed up in Detroit and had an out-of-his-mind year.

But time to get down to reality. Cabrera can still hit, but contributes little elsewhere. He's slow and has to play first base because he's incapable of playing anywhere else competently. Victor Martinez is a total defensive liability. He can't play ANY position. And he's even slower on the basepathes. Plus he's getting old. Is it realistic to expect the other Martinez to have more years like the last one? Likely not.

After tearing up the league for a few years, the Fastball Flakes man himself, Justin Verlander, turned in a journeyman-esque 2014 performance. Will he roar back in 2015, or is the soon-to-be 32-year-old showing the first signs of fading? Play long enough and it happens to the best of them. Sometimes quite suddenly.

No word lately on the fate of fellow former Cy Younger Max Scherzer. But remember, Mad Max turned down a whopping $140 million long term contract extension offered by the Tigers last year. Though an incredible amount of money, evidently Scherzer thought he could do better. He certainly turned in another sparkling year, but can the Tigers afford to offer him even more? For that matter, would any other team?

David Price will want a big piece of the pie. Anabel Sanchez is under contract for $17M and, if not traded, Rick Porcello is in line for a big raise.

Also bear in mind that while Major League Baseball has no "salary cap", per se, they do have a strange entity known as the "luxury tax". Right now it sits at $189 million for the total team payroll. Any team that exceeds it (the Yankees have been the worst offenders) has to cough up extra bucks that go to a variety of funds. Even billionaire owners in big markets are loathe to fork over millions of other dollars for which they get no possible return on the field. The Tigers themselves got banged a few years back by overspending, and didn't win squat.

So if a team starts forking out $20 million here, and $20 million there to a select few players, they might find themselves in a financial squeeze trying to fill out the rest of their roster with good players, while staying under the luxury tax threshold.

Sure, they won the AL Central Division again -- barely -- but were exposed in the playoffs getting broomed by the Baltimore Orioles. Best team won. And despite their local hype, it's not like the Tigers don't have some serious holes to fill.

The shortstop position remains unsettled, as does third base and left field. The Tigers themselves have admitted they're in the market for a new every day center fielder, because Rajai Davis isn't quite up to snuff. One can only wonder how long their every day catcher, the beleaguered Alex Avila can last. He's pretty good defensively, not much with the bat, but continues to take a beating behind the plate.

Second baseman Ian Kinsler costs them a pile of money, and he's 32. As bell curves go, Mr. K has likely peaked and is now on the downside of his. With PEDs supposedly out of the equation, it's a rare exception when a player actually gets better after turning the ripe old age of 32 or so. It's the classical paradox in most sports. Just when an athlete has finally mastered the game mentally -- their physical attributes start to gradually erode. They know every possible nuance of their profession, but their bodies won't cooperate like they once did to allow them to do what they want to do. Evidently, God built in his own little bell curve when it comes to such things. Tear it up when you're young, but not have a clue. When you finally figure it all out, Father Time will start dragging you down. And he adds weights every year.

In sum, the Tigers have been heavy with starting pitching, have a couple aging sluggers, and a whole bunch of maybes they hope can come through more often than not. Plus, their bullpen has been a collective nail-biter, to say the least. They're far below average defensively and have little team speed. Also, they're likely to lose Scherzer elsewhere.

Prez and GM Dave Dombrowski can wheel and deal all he wants, but for every "get" there has to be a "give". Contrary to the local hype, there's not a whole lot of promising prospects left down on their "farm". They've either already been called up or traded in other deals.

So unless owner Mike Ilitch is willing to blow by the luxury tax threshold, and throw countless millions into the wind while doing so, yours truly would submit the Tigers' window of opportunity to win their first World Series since 1984 is about to start closing.

There's a lot of factors in play, most of which work against the Tigers. Age, money, and other younger clubs with cheaper payrolls that keep getting better.

Look at it this way. If money could buy a championship, the Yankees and Dodgers would meet in the World Series every year. When's the last time that happened?

Sometimes clubs with lesser payrolls and lesser names just come together and play like junkyard dogs when it counts most.

The irony? Players that become famous on such teams often bail for free agency and the guaranteed mega-bucks another team offers them. And while they get filthy rich, they will never sniff another championship again.

Detroit Lions. Playoff bound?

Maybe. The Murphy's Law syndrome that has plagued them for decades seems to have done a U-turn. Everything that could go right, HAS gone right.

Currently at a very respectable 9-4, the Lions are definitely in the hunt for a playoff spot. But make no mistake, a lot of this has to do with two things. A great deal of luck, and a weak schedule.

Remember, earlier in the year, the Lions made three improbable 4th quarter comebacks to win games against New Orleans, Atlanta, and Miami. In the one against the Falcons -- in London -- the game was lost after a last second field try missed. But on a penalty to THEMSELVES, the Lions got another shot. That one was good. How often does THAT happen?

The following week they had to face the high-flying Arizona Cardinals out west. But their starting QB Carson Palmer had gone down with a season-ending injury the game before. A fantastic break for the Lions. Alas, they would still lose that game, but it was as if Lady Luck at least gave them a much better shot.

OK, they then got blistered @ New England. Did anyone really expect otherwise? But while other teams have had to endure brutal schedules, this was the only really tough game for the Lions.

Next up, three patsy games against Chicago, Tampa Bay, and Minnesota -- all at home. The Bears are in free-fall, the Bucs are terrible, and the Vikings not much better, especially still without the services of Adrian Petersen. The Lions have won the first two to pad their record. Then a road game at Soldier Field in a rematch with the Bears. For an entire month, could their schedule possibly have been any easier?

Their regular season finale is against the Packers in Green Bay. While the Lions might well be 11-4 going into that game, chances are Aaron Rodgers and company will take them to the frozen woodshed at Lambeau, switches in hand. Still, 11-5 ain't too shabby, especially considering the Lions could easily have wound up 8-8, far out of the playoff picture, if not for things falling their way this year.

And the luck doesn't stop there. Consider the NFC playoff picture. The Cardinals are likely in, as is Green Bay. The Eagles are looking pretty good in the East. Count them in. In the pitiful south, somebody has to be division champion, which guarantees a playoff berth. That leaves the two wild card spots.

Most think it will come down to Detroit, Seattle, and Dallas. This is where the Lions have caught yet another break. Though the defending Super Bowl champion Seahawks appear to be rounding back into championship form, -- a methodical beatdown of the Eagles in Philly was quite impressive -- the Cowboys (despite currently sporting the same 9-4 record as the Lions) have a problem. Actually three of them.

The first is their next game, in Philly. Just a couple weeks back, the Eagles hammered them in Jerry Jones' palace. Things will likely only get worse in the City of Brotherly Love -- especially coming off the stinging defeat at the hands of the Seahawks.

Then they get Indianapolis, Andrew Luck and company, no slouches, and playoff contenders as well.

Lastly, Tony Romo and the Cowboys have become known for their December swoons in recent years.

So just for fun, let's do a little crystal ball gazing and guessing. The Cardinals in the West, Packers in the North, Atlanta in the South, and Philly in the East all win their divisions. The Cowboys fall out of wild card contention.

That would leave the Lions and the Seahawks.

And if THAT happens, Detroit Lions' fans need to ask themselves an honest question.

Do I really think my beloved Honolulu blue and silver heroes have the remotest shot at knocking off the Seahawks in the intense atmosphere of a playoff game -- especially if it's in Seattle?

But one never knows. Three more games remain to be played and a lot of things can happen.

Yet if this plays out the way it's shaping up right now -- the anti-Murphy, Lady Luck, and a weak schedule will have gone by the wayside for the Lions. Playoff time is playoff time and they better hope things shake out to where their first game isn't in Seattle. Because if it is, the Lions' streak of only winning one playoff game since Super Bowls started back in the 1960s will continue.

Certainly, the Lions have improved a great deal since last year for various reasons. But when looking at the whole landscape of the NFL, from the elite, to bottom-feeders, to all those somewhere in between -- the Lions are amongst the latter.

Better than average, but nowhere near Super Bowl caliber. If they make the playoffs, which seems likely, look for them to make a quick exit as well. Better is good, but they're not ready for prime time yet, and may not be any year soon.

And let's get real. Matthew Stafford can pass for 3 or 4 miles worth of yardage every year, and Calvin Johnson can catch most of them. Their defense can be amongst the stoutest in the league. Stats here, stats there, stats everywhere. But until they can make a deep playoff run against the big boys when it counts most, up to and including the Super Bowl, it just doesn't matter.

And it ain't gonna happen this year either. Again. Good, but not nearly good enough. Who's kidding who?

The case for TCU

But you know what? Though nobody knows for sure what the almighty "committee" will come up with in a few hours, chances are good the Horned Frogs will be left out of the Final Four college football national championship playoff.

And that's not right. Sure, a lot of game action happened earlier and several teams tried to make their cases. Some were impressive. Some not so much.

Already considered a Top 2 team, Oregon avenged their only loss by throttling #7 Arizona 51-13. The Ducks are definitely in. But everybody likes ducks for various reasons. Some people feed them cracked corn at nature centers (me), while others sit out in the rain with shotguns and decoys trying to blast a couple for dinner. And hey, Daffy Duck ran around nude from the waist down for years on TV. Everybody loved Daffy. Alas, nobody's seen him around lately. Maybe the politically correct people finally caught up with him. Or a 12 gauge.

Alabama handled Missouri 42-13, so the Tide is in as well. One way or the other, you just knew Bama was going to be there at the end.

Florida State barely hung on to defeat Georgia Tech 37-35. Hardly a ringing endorsement. But consider: The Seminoles are reigning national champs. They started the season at #1, and still haven't lost a game -- 29 wins in a row. How they've managed to drop to #4 when the teams above them all have a loss on their record is a good question. But dropping them out of the playoff picture would be mind-boggling. Ain't gonna happen. The 'Noles are in.

So now it comes down to the fourth and final spot.

Ohio State made a huge statement by steamrolling a very good Wisconsin team 59-0 in the Big Ten conference championship game. Though now on their third quarterback, the Buckeyes have gotten better instead of worse. They're as good as anybody right now. But way back in Week 2, they got blistered by two touchdowns in their own house by an unranked Virgina Tech team. Isn't that supposed to matter? Evidently not. The early buzz has OSU, which was ranked #5 or 6 before the Wisconsin game, making a last second jump into the playoffs. That means they would have leap-frogged....

TCU. The Horned Frogs were a consensus Top 4 team going into their final regular season game. Yes, it was against lowly Iowa State, but a Big 12 conference opponent, and that's just how the schedule worked out. They walloped the Cyclones 55-3, twenty points over the point spread. The Frogs likely could have put up a couple more touchdowns had they not gone into "taking a knee" mode halfway through the fourth quarter. They showed a bit of mercy, and definitely a touch of class by doing so. Their only loss, in a pretty tough conference, was to Baylor, another Top 10 team, on the road, by 3 points.

But let's gets real. TCU was a doormat team for decades and there are those that still can't wrap their minds around them being a legitimate contender. In other words, they were (and are) looking for a way to leave them out.

And tomorrow, they likely will be. But how can a team that was ranked #3 win their last game by a conservative 52 points and drop two or more spots in the polls? Answer below.

We have heard repeatedly about strength of schedule and total bodies of work being determining factors. As another in a long line of one loss teams, TCU has a fairly complete resume. To boot, the Big 12 is no pansy conference. They feature four teams in the Top 25.

Answer to question. Two reasons. The "committee" and the TV folks. Put another way -- politics and money.

Consider the folks on the committee itself.

Four are athletic directors at various universities. OK, qualified.
A Vice Chancellor. Hmmm.
A former NCAA executive vice-president. Does he know football?
Tom Osborne. He definitely knows college football.
Archie Manning? Hey, if Peyton and Eli can keep making stupid commercials, might as well put the old man on a committee.
A former Commissioner of the Big East. Sounds too political. See Vice Chancellor above.
A former reporter. Why former?
A retired Air Force general? And what, pray tell, does HE know about college football?
Some dude named Tyrone that coached seven different football schools -- and was fired from them all.
And of course, the beloved Condoleezza Rice. We've long heard about how super-smart she is. So why is it she never could seem to get anything right when she was in the limelight of the political world?

This is quite the motley crew. But they all rose to their current positions because they were adept at "playing the game", which has nothing to do with football.

On the other hand is TV. If you were a network executive, who would you rather see in the playoffs? Ohio State or TCU? Which do you think would generate more mega-bucks in ad time? And don't think for a minute the committee isn't acutely aware of such things. According to the commercial, they might be in a sequestered room guarded by some doofus-looking cop, but they're hardly out of touch with other movers and shakers in the real world. In the end, big bucks always seem to have a way of winning out.

So yours truly fully expects TCU, though certainly deserving, to get eased out of the playoffs. Politics, pressure, and money will prevail.

The only upside to this is the head coaches. Three of them have to lose before it's all over. As a new guy, Mark Helfrich at Oregon seems like a nice enough sort since taking over from Chip Kelly. But Urban Meyer at OSU, Nick Saban at Bama, and Jimbo Fisher at FSU are all cocky, smug, holier-than-thou SOBs -- which shows in their players' body language and attitude as well --  that need to be taken down a peg. At least two of them will be in January.

I'm still rooting for ya, TCU, but I don't think you're going to make the cut.

And no, it's not fair. Even if you hadn't shown class by not running up the score anymore against Iowa State, and pounded them 80-3 or whatever, it likely wouldn't have made any difference. The fix was in. Ohio State putting a beatdown on Wisconsin just made it easier to justify what they wanted all along.

Amazing things about Green Bay and their fans

Yours truly has had the pleasure of visiting Green Bay just once, and that was several years ago. It was in the fall -- color change time -- and my ex and I were touring the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. Beautiful country, but they can have all that snow in the winter. Brrr.

At any rate, after spending a couple days in Copper Harbor, we were heading south, not knowing exactly what our next destination was. When travelling by car and already at the tip of the Keweenaw Peninsula, going south is pretty much the only option, unless one wants to sleep with the fishes and boatwrecks in Lake Superior.

Eventually, we saw a road sign that said "go this way to Green Bay", or something like that. A look and nods were exchanged, and the deal was done. In a couple more hours we were in Green Bay. Green Bay isn't exactly Chicago, LA, San Fran, or NYC when it comes to things going on. So of course we wanted to check out Lambeau Field, home of the Packers.

Two tourists wandering around the outside of the stadium with a camcorder. And here came a security guard on a scooter. Uh-oh, we're busted. But quite the opposite happened. After explaining, the guard told us to hop on his scooter and gave a guided tour all around the stadium, pointing out all kind of interesting stuff. He couldn't let us inside because the Packers were practicing at the time. This was when Brett Favre was still their QB. But he glanced at his watch and informed us practice would be breaking up shortly, and took us to the gate where the players would come out. He said they were really good about associating with fans, signing autographs, and the like. And sure enough, right on cue, out they came. Though we weren't much into autographs, many of the players were definitely willing to briefly chat before they headed out to their vehicles and drove away. All in all, a very cool day. I'll never forget the hospitality that security guard showed a couple dumb-ass tourists from Michigan. However, it wasn't until later that something dawned on me. Why were we the only two people greeting the players as they exited the stadium? Never have figured that out.

After all, no town is more football crazy per capita than Green Bay. Though far and away the NFLs smallest market, those people were, and remain absolutely bonkers over their Packers. And good for them. Who are these people? Let's look a little closer.

Green Bay has a population of roughly 105,000.
49% male, 51% female.
Somewhat surprisingly, the average age is around 34 years old.
Not so surprising is the average household income. Around $40,000.
Per capita, the average is $24,000. Lots of working couples in Green Bay.
Average value of a house or condo is around $140,000.
There's nothing particularly eye-opening about any of the above. It just sounds about average.

But when it comes to getting season tickets to the Packers is where things get crazy.

As mentioned above, though the smallest market, after recent additions, Lambeau Field has the third highest seating capacity in the NFL, barely trailing only those of the Redskins in Maryland and the NY Giants/Jets in New Jersey. All are above 80,000.

So if Lambeau can accommodate 80,000 and the whole town is only 105,000, one might think there's plenty of tickets to go around. One couldn't be more wrong.

The waiting list for season tickets at Lambeau Field has over 111,000 names on it. When Cheeser babies first pop out of the womb, their parents typically put them on the list. Why? Because the average waiting time to get season tickets is over 30 years. Incredible.

Recently, a Packers fan finally got his tickets. He'd been on the list for 37 years. That goes back to when Jimmy Carter was President. The Shah was still in charge in Iran. Larry Bird and Magic Johnson hadn't even played against each other in college yet. Before home computers, let alone laptops and iPads. Homes had rotary phones. There was no cable TV or dishes. If you were watching the boobtube, you had an antenna on your roof. Happy Days was the #1 rated TV show. How long ago does that seem?

And after 37 years, his tickets didn't exactly come cheap. He had to pay $4200 for the "right" to buy them. Then $2380 per season for two tickets to seven games. Or $170 bucks a pop for two seats in Row 41 of the endzone. Yes, NFL teams play eight "home" games, but the Packers always play one in Milwaukee. That's a whole different "get in line" deal.

Nevertheless, this raises an interesting question. If after waiting 37 years, this poor devil could only get seats in Row 41, then who are all those young folks in the front row catching players when they do the "Lambeau leap"?

Hmm. Maybe this explains why the average age in Green Bay is 34. They're getting rid of all the old folks so they can inherit their season tickets. Even the Packers front office has acknowledged that rightfully earning front row season tickets the old-fashioned way -- by gradually moving up over time -- would require someone to live to be over 950 years old. That's some seriously aged cheese.

You'll remember they called the movie Soylent Green. Not blue, red, yellow or purple. Green. And that came out just before the 37 year man first signed up for tickets. Heck, the name "Packers" itself originated with a canned meat company. Food for thought. Ahem.

Maybe I'll make it back to Green Bay someday -- or maybe not. But I'll always remember two things.

The security guard, bless his heart wherever he is, and Lambeau wasn't the only stop. Green Bay actually had a Harley dealership. If memory serves me correctly, I believe it was called McCoy's. So being a long time rider, I had to get a shirt. Haven't seen it in a while either, but it's gotta be in a drawer or closet around here somewhere with all the rest of them.

So enough with this nonsense. I now have a mission. Find the Green Bay shirt and wear it tomorrow.

They're not the only ones with a passion......

Tiger Woods. The latest

Sound the trumpets, bring on the dancing girls, and stay glued to twitter feeds. His Highness Eldrick Tont Woods is back. Again. Fittingly enough, in the Hero World Challenge.

Tiger is sporting a new swing, new clubs, new trainer, supposedly new attitude, and has anybody seen Lindsey Vonn lately? Maybe he's a got a new one of those too.

After a somewhat brutal 2014 season that saw him tumble in the world rankings, Woods has finally emerged to ply his trade stalking the links once again. And what better place to come out of seclusion and show up at than the Hero World Challenge? For over 20 years Eldrick has been put on a pedestal by his throngs of admirers/fans/groupies, and most certainly the sports media. They could never get enough of this guy. The TV folks would show highlights of past performances by Tiger even during tournaments he wasn't playing in, while ignoring the live action.

Perhaps it was because Woods was a black man that was dominating a predominantly white man's sport. And he certainly did for about a decade. Once upon a time, there was little doubt that Tiger would surpass Jack Nicklaus' all-time record of "major" victories. He was winning seemingly everything. Oddsmakers would take him over the entire field in any given tournament.

But then came his personal problems and injuries. Tiger crashed, and he hasn't been nearly the same ever since. He last won a major in 2008 -- his 14th. When the spring of 2015 and the Masters tournament rolls around, it will have been seven years since Woods won anything of note. In order to catch Jack, he would have to be the first player in golfing history to win 4 majors after reaching the ripe old age of 39.

And that's not likely. In recent years, the question has been more whether Woods would make a cut and, if so, would he self-destruct on the weekend?

When Tiger was a young gun, he was definitely feared by veteran players on tour. Now Woods is just another old guy and the current young guns (that have popped up from around the globe and will most likely continue to do so in the future) know they can not only stare him down -- but beat him. Times have changed. Turns out the new kids on the block have every bit as much game and poise under pressure as Woods once had.

Time will tell (and 2015 will be especially telling) whether Woods still has some of the old magic left in him and can return to being a force in the world of professional golf at its highest levels. Besides the young guns that keep on coming, he's battling Father Time as well at this stage of his career.

Nevertheless, Tiger's first foray back onto the world stage, after months of preparation, was a resounding thud. In the opening round of the Hero Challenge, he hit a drive into a neighboring back yard, duffer-chumped 4 chip shots, didn't putt well, shot a 77, and wound up dead last out of a field of 18. A full eleven strokes behind the leader -- after ONE round.

Maybe Eldrick eventually gets his game back together, and maybe he doesn't. And perhaps it's unfair to judge him after only one round. But this initial performance was hardly that of a hero. More like an over-the-hill has-been showing up for a paycheck.

But never fear, the media, internet, and TV folks were all over it. Evidently, even Tiger stinking it up -- again -- remains fascinating in their world. Amazing.

How bad does this guy have to get before the hero worship stops?