NFL chuckleheads

You gotta love Terrell Suggs of the Baltimore Ravens. Or laugh at him. No stranger to personal fouls and other goonish behavior himself over the years, Suggs was asked what it would take for the Ravens to defeat the Pittsburgh Steelers in the Sunday night game.

Stop right there. The Ravens aren't going to beat the Steelers -- especially in Pittsburgh. Forget that. If there's a way to blow the game -- they'll find it against their long time nemesis.

But dear Terrell spoke right up and said, "We have to stop #23."

Just one little problem with that.

There IS no #23 on the Pittsburgh roster. Perhaps he was referring to running back Le'Veon Bell, who wears #26. Hey, if Suggs and his teammates are busy trying to chase a phantom player, no wonder they've historically struggled against the Steelers. It would appear head coach John Harbaugh and his staff have a bit of work to do -- like -- explaining to chuckleheads such as Suggs who's who on opposing teams.

While briefly in a local watering hole, shortly after the Detroit Lions game, a Latino gentleman I never met before, having evidently watched the game there, made a comment to yours truly regarding the Motown puddy-tats. To wit: "Even when they win, they look bad". To which I replied, "Truer words were never spoken, amigo". His drop-dead gorgeous female companion seemed to think that was funny for some reason. Always happy to put a smile on a woman's face, especially a beauty like that one. Wow, lucky man.

Forget the sad-sack Lions taking on the equally woeful Tampa Bay Bucs. I was much more interested in the Philly/LA Ram game. You know, two GOOD teams going at it. And it turned out to be quite the exciting game, not decided until the closing seconds. As you know, the Eagles prevailed and locked up the NFC East division title with three games left to play.

Alas, starting Eagle QB Carson Wentz went out with a knee injury, severity and possible length of absence unknown. If he's officially zapped, so are the Eagles' chances of going far in the post-season. Ask the Green Bay Packers, a  pre-season pick to be a Super Bowl contender, how things have gone since Aaron Rodgers went down with a broken collar bone. They just barely -- BARELY -- got by the Cleveland Browns -- in overtime.

Nonetheless, the always breathless announcers, who never saw a player or coach that wasn't the greatest at something, had Wentz right up there as a possible NFL MVP candidate.

Fast forward to the Baltimore/Pittsburgh game. Now it's wide receiver Antonio Brown who just might be the MVP.

Pick any two teams, even bottom-feeding ones, and the play-by-play guys will figure out a way to make a case for an MVP on at least one of them -- maybe both. Talk about chuckleheads. Have they no shame, or have the "politically correct" gods they all seem to worship these days turned whatever brains they once had into borscht?

Since when is it so wrong to just tell it like it is?

The Cleveland Browns stink, from ownership on down to the lowliest assistant -- players included. Period.

Detroit Lions' fans seem forever doomed to lifetimes of idiocy thinking their team in going to be contenders every year.

The difference between the Browns and the Lions? In Cleveland, the people know and accept the fact their team sucks.

And yes, Colin Kaepernick, whether one considers his "kneeling" cause to be righteous or offensive, committed career suicide by doing so. He may or may not be a capable NFL quarterback -- opinions vary -- but the chances of any team offering him a contract -- especially after he sued the league for "collusion", are virtually nil, nada, ain't gonna happen. Only a chucklehead thinks this guy is going to get another shot. Forget that. With apologies to Mr. Spock of original Star Trek fame, may dear Colin live long and prosper, but the man made his bed, and he's going to have to sleep in it. It's only, ahem, logical. Sorry for the lame play on words.

Interesting how Sports Illustrated came out with their "Sportsperson of the year" issue and featured two co-winners.

J.J. Watt and Jose Altuve, with respective articles singing their praises. Both of which play(ed) for Houston teams, the Texans and Astros respectively. What are the chances of that happening?

It appears even the chuckleheads at SI can't pick a winner and stick to it.

But the chucklehead of the year award should rightfully go to Danica Patrick.

Years ago, the hero-makers anointed her the greatest thing to happen in Indy car racing. Problem was, despite having first class gear, she couldn't win squat.

Never fear, it was on to NASCAR, and even more acclaim. Plopped into another top-flite car, with pit crew to match, Ms. Patrick was nothing more than a wreck waiting to happen every week. Her main sponsor -- Go Daddy -- finally went. It had to get tiresome, not to mention expensive, building her a brand new $400,000 race car almost every week. And that's not even to mention how many other drivers she "took out" along the way. The total carnage was well up into the multi-millions. She never won anything on the NASCAR circuit either.

It seemed her main claim to fame was an occasional foot-stomping hissy fit on pit row.

Now finally, mercifully, dear Danica has decided to retire from that venture. Or she couldn't find anybody else with deep pockets and shallow common sense to keep throwing their money away on an obviously futile enterprise doomed to destruction from the onset.

To all of which, no doubt the other drivers on the NASCAR circuit breathe a sigh of relief. The wrecking machine with an attitude is finally gone. Whew!

No doubt, some will find a way to make Danica a hero, despite being a loser her whole career.

Hard to say which is/are the bigger chucklehead(s). Her, or those folks that will continue to worship her.