Monday, December 31, 2018

Detroit Lions and another pitiful year

To the surprise of many, including yours truly, the Detroit Lions finished up the 2018 season with an impressive win, throttling Green Bay, in Green Bay, to the tune of 31-0. But was it really that impressive? I'll get back to that.

Problem was, and almost always is, the season had long been a lost cause for the Honolulu blue and silver puddy-tats.

It quickly became apparent in Week One, when they were throttled at home by the lowly New York Jets. 48-17 is a beat-down, no matter how you slice it or dice it.

Getting whupped by the equally bad San Fran 49ers the following week was an exclamation point to the phrase, "you ain't no good, again".

Then something very strange happened, the sort of thing that always drives the bookies crazy when it comes to the Lions. In Week Three, they handily dispatched Tom Brady and the New England Patriots. How the HELL did THAT happen? A confounding enigma for the ages.

Once again, the Detroit sappies had the ever-elusive "hope". Suckers.

As the season went on, the Lions would, no surprise, lose more than they won. A final record of 6-10 doesn't lie.

And one of those wins was of the miracle variety against the above-mentioned Packers. Green Bay's long-time and ever-reliable place-kicker Mason Crosby apparently went temporarily brain dead or spastic against the Lions. How else to explain him missing three "chip-shot" field goals and an extra point? That's ten points the Packers should have had. The Lions won by eight. Thing is, Lions fans always take the good breaks in stride, like they were supposed to happen. But they'll scream bloody murder when the shoe is on the other foot and something goes against them. NOT FAIR!!!  Hmm. Sound familiar from a certain politician? Ahem.

Hey, you can't lose to gawd-awful teams like the Jets, 49ers, and later on the Buffalo Bills, unless you're pretty bad yourself.

Getting back to the Packers, that proud franchise appears to be in free-fall. More chaos than what's going on in DC.

First of all, what could they POSSIBLY have been thinking when they let long-time star receiver Jordy Nelson go back in March? No trade, just released him. Bang, you're outta here. For one thing, he was only 33 years old. Not exactly a young pup any more but hardly a geezer either. Plus, he'd been quarterback Aaron Rodgers' favorite target during his ten years with the Packers, putting up impressive numbers every year. Steady as they come.

Rodgers himself appears to be in decline, but the team around him, both offensively and defensively, has hugely regressed as well.

And to cap it all off, they fired long-time head coach Mike McCarthy in the middle of the season, only to bring in another retread with a different system? It was a recipe for disaster, and that's exactly what happened.

So maybe the Lions victory in Lambeau wasn't so impressive after all. Neither team had anything to play for at that point, but the Packers had already been coming apart at the seams all year long. They were just going through the proverbial motions, and in a dysfunctional way at that.

Yet it's just like the Lions to do this to their ever-gullible fans.

They won't remember how horrible the team was for the majority of the 2018 season.

Nosirree. They're back on their own special version of "cloud nine" savoring the 31-0 thumping they gave the Packers.

And they'll be chomping at the bit to get behind their heroes when the 2019 campaign kicks off next summer/fall. No matter who or what the Lions take in the NFL draft, the team will claim it a huge success, every one of those bodies is a can't-miss stud, they got everybody they wanted to -- and the fans will buy it hook, line, and stinker again. Did I mention suckers?

But guess what? It was hardly a surprise the Lions stunk it up in 2018. And they won't be any good next year either. Or the year after that. Repeat, repeat, repeat. Like Calvin Megatron Johnson, who played a full decade and never tasted a single playoff victory, then got out of the madness of Detroit with his mind and body intact, and plenty of dough in the bank, it's quite likely quarterback Matthew Stafford will never win a playoff game either. And BTW, is there a more ridiculously overpaid athlete on the planet than Detroit's Georgia Peach? The dude's making $30 million a year, has a career record of about ten games UNDER .500, and has never won a playoff game? What kind of insanity is this?

The answer, of course, is it's insanity, Detroit/Ford ownership style. Has been for over a half century.

It is worth noting that when the late William Clay Ford closed the deal on buying the team, it was on the exact same day John F. Kennedy took quite a fateful ride in Dallas.

That right there should have been an omen, a very bad one. But of course nobody noticed some auto company heir purchasing an NFL team with all the mayhem following those gunshots in Big D.

In sum, it's just another year for the Lions. 6-10? Business as usual.

And yes, they are, and remain the.....same.....old.....Lions.

Would any sane person expect anything else of them?

Yawn.












Saturday, December 29, 2018

College football playoffs

To nobody's great surprise, except maybe the usual punch-drunky leprechauns of Notre Dame, Clemson blistered them in a national semi-final game. The Tigers are the real deal. The Fighting Irish were WAY over their heads tangling with those guys.

But this is what happens when so many pundits always have Notre Dame as some sort of sentimental favorite. Win one for the Gipper, Rudy, and all that nonsense. ND stubbornly refuses to join a conference, and why should they? They have their own mega cha-ching TV deal, and get to pick who they want to play. Notice on the rare occasions they play a "ranked" team, it's always at home. And during any season, they'll load up on patsies along the way. But when it comes time to tee it up against the "big boys", as in Clemson, they're typically get embarrassed. Getting beat by 30 points (and it could and should have been much worse) on national television at a neutral site is what they had coming.

As noted in this space before, what's with the name Fighting Irish anyway? The real Notre Dame is a cathedral in Paris. Well OK, the Fighting French wouldn't have the same ring to it, but can't they even get their countries right?

On the other side of the equation was the Oklahoma/Alabama semi-final. The #1 ranked Crimson Tide were a two touchdown favorite going in. The only surprise was that they didn't "cover". After jumping out to a 28-0 nothing lead, maybe they just got bored.

As good as Alabama is though, the thing about that game was Oklahoma showed the Tide was vulnerable, particularly on defense, as the game wore on. While Bama remains a scoring machine, they also give up a lot of big plays to an offense that knows how to exploit their weaknesses.

And the above-mentioned Clemson plays fast, has depth, and a ton of offensive weapons they'll no doubt have ready to go in the national championship game next week.

After the two semi-final games, few would dispute the best two teams in the country will be duking it out for all the marbles.

It should be the proverbial dandy. Pretty sure Bama will be favored, but not by much. The same two teams have flip-flopped national titles the last three years.

Bring it on.

Wednesday, December 26, 2018

The Golden State Warriors' problem

Of late, many talking heads and other pundits, in their never-ending zeal to create a story if a real one isn't available, have been asking --- what's wrong with the Golden State Warriors?

Of course, this intensified when they were blown out on their own court by Lebron James and the LA Lakers on Christmas. I'll get back to that.

But what's really ailing the Dubs?

Two things. The most obvious is their best player, one Steph Curry, has been rehabbing an injury lately. Take Tom Brady away from the Patriots and how good do you think they'd be?

Yet the other is much more subtle.

I would submit they're just bored, merely going through the motions, for now.

They're fresh off another world championship, had their parade, got their rings, etc. After a few months of R & R, what's to look forward to?

Just another long season. Eighty two games worth, with all the practices, meetings, film sessions, and a bazillion miles of air travel along the way to stay in hotels far away from home and play in front of hostile crowds. It's gotta get old, regardless of how much money they make -- which is ridiculous -- but that's a story for another day.

But wait a second. What do they mean they're "underachieving"?

Aren't they comfortably leading their division almost half way through the 2018 season? And BTW, last time I looked they had the best record in the entire Western Conference of the NBA.

Some have claimed that a team can't have a magical "switch" to turn on and off whenever they feel like it, making the difference between stellar play and just mediocre.

Yours truly would disagree, and so did Warrior Draymond Green in a recent Sports Illustrated article. They indeed appear to possess that switch.

Let's not forget that last year, in the semi-finals of the playoffs, going up against the Houston Rockets for the Western Conference conference title and another trip to the Finals, the Dubs found themselves down 3-1 in that series. With two of the remaining three games to be played in Houston. We all know what happened They flipped the switch at the last second, came roaring back to eliminate the Rockets and blistered the above mentioned James and the Cleveland Cavaliers in the Finals. Skunked them.

So basically, the Dubs have nothing to prove, especially during the regular season. Lose games they likely could have won? No big deal. No sane person would doubt they're going to make the playoffs again. They could do that almost blindfolded. So why should they go the proverbial "balls to the wall" with their hair on fire until the games really matter?

Relax, scribes and yappy heads. These guys will be just fine when the heat gets turned up again in another four months or so. They KNOW they can do it. Been there, done that.

Conversely, as mentioned above, James and the Lakers have something to prove, every game. That they can be competitive. So they're playing their tails off, night in and night out. That would easily explain how they dominated the Warriors in a game most (especially the Warriors) will forget about in a few days, if they haven't forgotten already.

Yet will the Lakers be gassed when the playoffs roll around, if they continue to play all-out the entire regular season? Maybe. We'll see. But even if they make the playoffs, no given despite their current pretty good record, no way in hell would they compete with the Dubs in a playoff series, when the switch has officially been turned to the "on" position again.

Bottom line, methinks the Dubs are just bored, for now.

But barring a slew of injuries, look out when June rolls around. It's still the same cast of characters.










Sunday, December 23, 2018

More dumb things. Grrr

Spouted by one Tony Dunge in the prelude to Sunday night's game between the KC Chiefs and Seattle Seahawks. While reviewing the league, he had the utter gall, and yes stupidity, to say, "Without question, the Philadelphia Eagles are Carson Wentz's team".

Really? I've got a lot of questions about that. Isn't Wentz the same guy that's been stinking it up all year as the losses mounted for the defending Super Bowl champions?

And hasn't he proven he can't stay healthy for an entire season? He's out again, just like last year.

And oh, BTW, wasn't it Nick Foles that led those same Eagles to the Super Bowl less than a year ago, won it, and was MVP of same?

Foles just threw for 471 yards against the Houston Texans, leading "his" team to a comeback win against the Houston Texans. All-time single-game franchise record -- while your boy Carson was still out rehabbing somewhere.

So I would ask the questions -- where do these networks get clueless clowns like Tony Dunge as on-air personalities? Is that the best they can do?

Speaking of the Seahawks, head coach Pete Carroll makes me wince every time I see him on TV. Here's a tip. Never trust a dude with little bitty teeth that's constantly chewing gum on fast-forward and talks a non-stop line of sh*t. It's like the proverbial shyster used-car salesman. He'd con his own mother and/or kids if he thought there was something good in it for him. Isn't this the same guy that ran a crooked program at Southern Cal, got caught, but flew the coop north to Seattle for mega-bucks, leaving USC on the hook for years of various NCAA sanctions and penalties?

And of course, there's always the sad-sack Detroit Lions. To absolutely no one's surprise, they just got blistered, at home, by the Minnesota Vikings. Another year down the toilet with no apparent help in sight.

Next week, the Detroit puddy-tats will limp into Green Bay to finish off the regular season. And you know what? It would be just like them to defeat the Packers. Never mind, Aaron Rodgers and Co. have stumbling badly this year as well. Badly enough to get long-time head coach Mike McCarthy fired mid-season. Unlike Detroit, they won't put up with a bad team for very long. Somebody's gotta go.

But if the Lions won, it would give their long-time sappies the same old thing they've trumpeted for decades. The ever-elusive "hope". Hey didya see that win at Green Bay? Wait until next year.

Right. How many times did Lucy have to pull the football away at the last minute before Charley Brown caught on that he was being duped?

He never did, you say?

Well then. I give you your average hard-core Detroit Lions' fan. Pretty much the same thing.

Alas. As dumb and obvious as some things are, there will always be those that fall for them.

P.T. Barnum was absolutely right. There's one born every minute.

Sigh.



Friday, December 21, 2018

Josh Gordon. Going, going.....

And we know what the unsaid last word in the title of this post usually is. Such would seem to be the case with one Josh Gordon, a wonderfully gifted receiver that appears unable to overcome those pesky "substances" the NFL says thou shalt not use.

Full disclosure. Has yours truly ever smoked weed? Sure. I went to college for four years and I'd wager less than 5% of the students didn't try it at one time or another. Thing is, I never much liked how it made me feel. So I don't partake now, and haven't for several decades. That's just me. To each their own.

Do I think it should be legalized across the board? Absolutely. And it will be eventually. One by one, the states are bowing to the will of the people, and even the feds will have to give the ridiculous "war" trying to stop it in time. Hey, it's everywhere, and has been for a long time. I don't have any serious connections", but I also have no doubt I could walk out my door any day of the week and score a bag within 30 minutes. Who's kidding who?

Thing is, when your employer says "don't do it", because we don't approve and we'll be testing for it, you have a choice. Either give it up, or keep on and start looking for a new job. Because, legal or not, you're going to get busted -- it's just a matter of time.

Josh Gordon, of course, knew this. And I, for one, aren't buying any of this "came from a rough childhood" nonsense. It's totally irrelevant, even insulting to semi-intelligent people. Gordon's a walking, talking, adult human being with a mind that appears quite functional.

[Idle thought. I just saw a few minutes of "The Wizard Of Oz" again for the umpteenth time. Nobody doubts this movie was one of the all-time classics. But a question. How did the Tin Man get all rusted up in the first place when tin doesn't corrode/oxidize? Maybe they should have called him the Iron Man instead. Oh wait. Back in those days (1939), Lou Gehrig already had that title. Never mind.]

Back to Gordon. Even JG himself has admitted he used a lot of stuff over the years. Not just pot, but coke and a few others as well. No problem here. Do what ya gotta do and whatever turns ya on. But if you keep getting zapped by your employer, (and the NFL, in tandem with the Players' Union has a lot more lenient policy towards such things than many employers), with suspensions and the like, you just might want to rethink your priorities. Is continuing to get high really worth forfeiting millions of bucks?

Gordon has also copped to having consumer alcohol or smoked pot before most every game in his entire career. No doubt that statement reverberated in a lot of places. And not in a good way.

Nevertheless, Josh Gordon is still only 27 years old. He should be in the prime of his NFL career, instead of on indefinite suspension again, with his chances of ever getting another "shot" dismal at best.

It seems such a waste.

But who knows? Maybe he's saved up enough dough from prior years to let him live the life of semi-luxury while enjoying the "smoke" he evidently enjoys so much.

If so, more power to him. As Mr. Spock of Star Trek fame was famous for saying -- live long and prosper.

Yet somehow, yours truly thinks this is going to end badly, one way or the other.

I wouldn't be a bit surprised if he never sees 40. Maybe even less.

All that talent, fame, and money -- poof --  down the tubes. Gone.

And that would be so very sad.

Alas.








Wednesday, December 19, 2018

Darius Slay, Pro-Bowler LOL

Fortunately, or more probably not, the NFL has a rule whereby all teams must be represented at the Pro Bowl.

Some of the really good teams -- see KC Chiefs, LA Chargers, etc. -- might have half a dozen players worthy of such an honor.

Conversely, some of the really bad teams -- see Detroit Lions -- don't have a single player on their roster that remotely qualifies as a "star". They're...just...that...bad.

That includes quarterback Matthew Stafford. Here's a guy that's been in the league ten years, has a career record of ten games UNDER .500, and hasn't won a single playoff game. And the Lions are paying THAT $30 million a year? Really? Only in Detroit could such lunacy happen.

Nonetheless, the "voters" had to choose somebody on the Lions for the post-season honor. So they likely held their noses and came up with ----

Cornerback Darius Slay. LOL 

DS proudly refers to himself as "big play Slay".

That he is, in a perverse sort of way. The problem being, he gives up a lot of big plays to the opponents rather than preventing them.

In any typical Lions game, you can pretty well count on Slay getting torched by an opposing receiver for a long gainer at least once.

And he seems to have this nasty penchant for holding as well, which often times enables the other team to keep a drive going. On any given pass play, watching Slay closely reveals he's holding a receiver one way or the other. As often as he gets flagged for it, it's a miracle there aren't even MORE yellow hankies thrown in his direction.

It could certainly be argued that Slay is an overall negative, not a positive, for his team

And now THIS guy will be celebrated at season's end playing basically an exhibition game with the best of the best around the NFL, with a big cha-ching bonus for having made the Pro-Bowl as well?

It's insanity.

All the while, because Slay made the team due to some retarded league-mandated quota, some other worthy player elsewhere doesn't make the cut?

Darius Slay. Pro-Bowler.

LOL




Sunday, December 16, 2018

The Nick Foles magic. Again?

Sure, many would scoff at the notion of Nick Foles being any sort of great quarterback. Hes knocked around the league for several years now and can't seem to even hold down a starting position.

But this is the same guy that stepped in for the Philadelphia Eagles last year and wound up leading them to a Super Bowl championship. The MVP of same, no less.

He probably never would have seen the field of play had not Eagles starter Carson Wentz gone down with a blown out knee last year. So ya gotta give credit where it's due. Foles stepped in, the Eagles took off and, presto, Lombardi trophy when it was all said and done.

This year, be it a Super Bowl hangover or whatever, the Eagles, with Wentz back, have floundered. They were a not-so-good 6 -7 heading into the Sunday night match-up against the LA Rams. Their playoff chances were iffy, at best.

Yet like last year, Wentz is out again. This time with a small fracture in his back. Will he be back this year? Nobody knows for sure.

A look around the NFC East, the division the Eagles belong to, doesn't exactly show a murderer's row.

The Washington Redskins, not that good to start with, were down to their third-string quarterback at last look, pretty much out of the picture.

The NY Giants are just gawd-awful.

The Dallas Cowboys had been showing a little life of late, then WHAM, they just got skunked by the Indianapolis Colts 23-0.

Enter NIck Foles again. He just led the Eagles to a victory over the (sorta) high-flying Rams -- in LA, no less.

So the Eagles are now 7-7, usually considered mundane, but also very much in the playoff picture.

Next week they go home to the "City of Brotherly Love", the ultimate misnomer, to take on the sometimes really good, sometimes not-so-good Houston Texans.

And then off to DC to face the Skins in the regular season finale.

Both games are definitely winnable.

If the Eagles can pull that off and wind up 9-7, even if the Cowboys sew up the division, they could sneak into the playoffs as a wild card.

And then -- who knows? Wild cards have gone on to win the Super Bowl before.

Could Foles and the Eagles -- gasp -- pull THAT off?

Probably not. After all, even if they make the post-season, their playoff road would involve going into Chicago against a resurgent and very good Bears team (especially defensively), down to the Big Easy to face Drew Brees and the high-flying Saints, maybe right back in LA for another go-round against those same Rams, or some combination of the above. And that WOULD be a murderer's row.

That's not even to mention who will survive the blood-bath in the AFC playoffs. The KC Chiefs, Brady and the Pats, under the radar but outstanding LA Chargers? And don't sleep on the Pittsburgh Steelers. Ya never know about those guys.

But wouldn't it be something if Nick Foles could pull off the "impossible" again?

Hey, nobody thought he and the Eagles could beat the Patriots in last year's Super Bowl either.

How did that turn out?

Carson who? 


Thursday, December 13, 2018

The almost KC Chiefs story

So there I was, all set to write another brilliant -- OK, maybe stupid -- post about the Kansas City Chiefs rolling into the playoffs with home-field advantage throughout after knocking off the LA Chargers.

I mean, c'mon. They jumped out to a 14-0 lead, and led 28-14 with under four minutes to go. At home. What could go wrong?

Turns out, plenty. Philip Rivers and Co. roared back for two late touchdowns, including having the cajones to go for a two-point game-winning conversion as time was expiring -- and made it.

Final score -- LA Chargers 29, KC Chiefs 28.

Yep, yours truly was ready to point out that KC had only lost two games so far this season, both on the road, against really good teams. A 43-40 nail-biter at New England way back on Oct. 14, and "whoever gets the ball last" 54-51 shoot-out loss at the LA Rams. The latter team is considered by many to be the best in the league. No shame in either of these losses.

For sure, KC was going to win over the Chargers and go to 12-2 on the season. True, they have a tough game in Seattle next week against a Seahawk team that lately thinks of themselves as contenders, then a mercy killing back home to finish off the regular season against the gawd-awful Oakland Raiders.

Arguably, Arrowhead Stadium, home of the Chiefs, is the toughest venue for any visiting team to play in. It's crazy loud.

Losing @ New England and @ the LA Rams was one thing, but who was going to knock off the Chiefs at home once the playoffs started?

What's that? They've lost 11 of their last 12 playoff games, including the last 6 in a row at home?

Hah. Ignore it. A mere anomaly. This year is different. Fake news! Witch hunt! No collusion! Oops, those are somebody else's lines. Ahem..

Shoo-in Rookie of the Year and leading MVP candidate Patrick Mahomes will quarterback these guys to greatness this year. Already has and it's going to get even better. You just wait and see.

Yessirree, I was on the KC bandwagon and would root them on to the Super Bowl.

And then they blew that late 14 point lead, at home, which pretty much totally torpedoed my original idea.

Hmmm.

Never mind.


Monday, December 10, 2018

Stupid QB contracts

Somebody please enlighten yours truly as to why one Kirk Cousins, currently the starting quarterback for the Minnesota Vikings, was given such an outrageous, see stupid, contract? The dude's been merely "average" for his whole career. This would include his college days at Michigan State, where he was WAY overhyped.

In the NFL, after being the same "average" for the Washington Redskins, the Vikings, normally a prudent team, signed this clown to a multi-year deal that will pay him $26,000,000 this year, $28,000,000 in 2019, and a whopping $30,000,000 in 2020?

This for a guy with a career record of 32-36? Oops, the Vikes just went down in Seattle on Monday Night Football. Make that 32-37.

What kind of insanity in going on here?

Not to be outdone, the Detroit Lions (granted, widely perceived as being somewhat of a retarded franchise over the decades -- and rightfully so), recently lost whatever little mind they ever had and gave QB Matthew Stafford a long-term deal?

One that will pay him, wait for it, $26,000,000, $29,000,000, $31,000,000, $30,000,000, and $23,0000,000 for the next five years?

This, for a guy that's been playing for a decade and never won a single playoff game? And has a history of choking at critical moments? His local press stooges have dubbed him "Captain Comeback" for sometimes pulling off improbable wins late in games. OK, but if he hadn't played so terribly for the first three quarters of said games, hence the Lions so often falling behind, this wouldn't be an issue.

All those mega-million lottery winner numbers for a guy who's record is 65-76?

Say what?

Sure, Mattie S, his lovely wife, and twin young-uns are happy. They'll have a bazillion dollars guaranteed coming in for the next several years.

But what could the Lions' "brain trust" -- and I use that term in the loosest way possible -- have possibly been thinking? They painted themselves into a salary cap financial corner just to lock this loser up until he's too old to play anymore? Huh?

Though now in his "prime", Stafford seems to be regressing. He's getting worse instead of better.

Even if the Lions' front office emerged from their collective coma, they couldn't trade him. No other team is going to touch that mega-contract for a career C- quarterback. So they're stuck with him. As are the Motown gridiron fans. A local scribe recently wrote Stafford could throw several interceptions every game, including a few "pick-sixes", lose them all -- and he'd STILL start for the Lions. That speaks volumes for them not having a young guy in the wings, supposedly learning, that can take over, which will have to happen eventually anyway.

It's not only short-sighted, but yes, incredibly stupid on the team's part.

Finally, there's the stupidity of some football pundits. They're already talking about Russell Wilson, currently the QB of the Seattle Seahawks, as a "lock" for the Hall of Fame?

Shut up. He's been pretty good, is mobile, and has a halfway decent arm. And yep, he's even won a Super Bowl.

But he also choked another Super Bowl win away in the waning seconds by attempting an incredibly bone-headed pass giving Tom Brady and the New England Patriots a(nother) gift Vince Lombardi trophy. The Pats didn't win that game. Wilson and the S-Hawks snatched defeat out of the jaws of victory.

True, a QB can't win a Super Bowl, or any other game, single-handedly. But Wilson has always had a lot of help. An unheralded but really good offensive line to protect him. A feature running back or two. Excellent receivers to throw to. And let's not forget about the "Legion of Boom" on the Seattle defense that so limited opponents. At least until recently, when it broke up for various reasons.

Let's have the Russell Wilson with a bust in Canton conversation maybe five years from now, depending on how he plays during that time. If he even stays healthy -- never a given.

But he's nowhere near Hall-worthy just yet.

So there you have Kirk, Matthew, and Russell. Not exactly on a par with Abraham, Martin, and John (at least one of which was a great American hero, the other two -- maybe not so much as things have turned out), as once famously crooned by Dion -- but the former are making a whole lot more money via.....

Refer to title above.






Sunday, December 9, 2018

Detroit Lions and Arizona Cards. zzzzzz

I have an alternate theory as to why Rip Van Winkle slept for twenty years. Back in the day, he happened to catch the Lions and Cardinals playing each other. Watching those two teams play is about enough to put anybody into a deep sleep..

How boring are they? They could cause the sun to wink out.

One is left to wonder -- how in the world does either one of these teams ever beat anybody else?

Could it be that such other teams, upon taking the field with the Lions or Cards, and seeing the action, or more properly lack of same, become so bored as to lapse into comas?

Quick, drug check the announcers for this game. The only way they could find things to refer to as "exciting" would be if they were seriously high on something. Then again, folks of their ilk would likely rant and rave watching grass grow, paint dry, blue haired old women playing canasta -- well -- you get my drift.

The NFL says it's always striving for parity. Well then. Maybe the best thing they could do is pare sorry teams like the Lions and Cardinals right out of the league. Or at least not televise them. What's that? Even the Lions and Cardinals draw decent on-air ratings? That's probably because once people at home tune in, they're sound asleep after a few minutes, and hence can't grab the clicker and change the channel. Poor devils are put under faster than a submarine with a screen door.

And now a word from our sponsors.

You've probably seen that truck commercial. I think it's for GM products. The young man just surprised his significant other by buying his and her new pick-ups. A black one for him and a red one for her. Whatta guy.

So what does she do? Runs to the black one (his) and says, "I love it". By the time he tries to feebly protest she's already inside it saying, "I love it" again. Grabby little thing.

Any REAL man would say the following -- "Love it? Great, but guess what? You can't have it. That's one's mine. The red one is yours. And if that's not good enough for ya, I'll send it back and get you a used Yugo or Pinto instead. And you'll be happy. So either you get your butt out of MY truck or I'm heading back inside to nix the deal.":

Women. I'm telling ya.

Not as boring as a Lions/Cards game to be sure, but there's something about that "maintenance" thing that goes horribly wrong at times.

Or -- I could just be kidding.

About the fairer sex, of course.

I'll stand on my Lions/Cards take.

Whatta snooze-a-thon.

Who won the game? Beats me. Who cares? Somehow I'd managed to stumble outside for some fresh air to wake up before the sandman swept me under. When I got back in, I immediately clicked it good-bye.

Sunday, December 2, 2018

Around the NFL -- and Eldrick Tont

Long tenured head coach Mike McCarthy got canned in Green Bay. It's also long been rumored he was at odds with one Aaron Rodgers. Of course the latter has been somewhat of a bust himself lately. For a so-called super-star, #12 has sure been stinking it up on the field recently.

But maybe this is what happens when a former great player starts shacking up with one Danica Patrick. Nothing exemplifies loser more so than dear Danica. All those years in NASCAR with nary a win. Many more in the Indy car circuit before that, with one obscure victory in Japan at a race most of the top drivers and teams didn't even show up for. And along the way, she likely wrecked more cars - hers and others -- than one would see in 15-20 demolition derbies. Maybe her losing ways are contagious. Alas, what a waste of sheet metal, millions of dollars, and a once really good quarterback.

Nonetheless, the Packers had been underwhelming this year to say the least. Losing at home to the lowly Arizona Cardinals likely sealed McCarthy's fate. The Cheesers, loyal at they normally are to their own, had likely seen enough. This guy's gotta go.

[Idle thought. If the fans indeed "own" the Packers, then who makes the decisions as to appointing the front office personnel, that hence has the hiring and firing power over head coaches? Do they have a caucus or something?

Worse, it appears fans can invest in the Packers -- buy "shares", but they aren't allowed to sell them. Sort of like the Eagles' oldie Hotel California. You can come, but you can never leave. What kind of fool would invest in a stock that they can't sell when it begins to tank? That's not only stupid, but probably illegal in the financial world.]

But MM gone. Ah, he's got enough dough to last several lifetimes. He'll be just fine.

I've long had a soft spot for the Chicago Bears. Though probably not Super Bowl contenders, it was nice to see them leading the NFC North Division. Then they went on the road to play the woeful NY Giants. Should have been a piece of cake win. But not so.

They needed a semi-miracle just to force overtime. And then something even stupider happened. After the Giants managed a field goal, the Bears got the ball. Match the field goal and the game goes on. Score a touchdown and they win.

On their ensuing possession, quarterback Chase Daniel managed to fumble three --count em -- THREE times. In the shotgun formation, one snap went between his legs. Beat him cleanly in the five hole. Another went through his hands and bounced off his face mask. So of course they lost. It put the "Duh" into Duh Bears.

Interesting how running back Todd Gurley of the LA Rams refused to score with his team already ahead by a touchdown over the Detroit Lions and time running low. He could have walked into the end zone, but chose to be put down at the 2 yard line. The announcers praised his "game management". By doing this, the Rams forced the Lions to burn the rest of their time-outs. And it worked out, cuz the Rams would go on to score a TD and secure the win anyway.

But what if -- they would have fumbled ala Daniel mentioned above? Instead of taking the easy 7 points and stretching their lead to 14 with under a minute remaining, the Lions would have gotten the ball only trailing by 7. Weirder things have happened than a team marching the length of the field in the last minute to score a touchdown. Had THAT occurred, and the Lions went on to somehow pull out another miracle win, Gurley would have been righteously roasted as an idiot. Hey, give me the seven points any time.

Eldrick Dept.

See the "Hero Challenge" played in the Bahamas. See eighteen of the world's best golfers get together to duke it out on a course that looked hard, but was yielding birdies -- and eagles -- like the average home-owner dishes out candy on Halloween.

See Spaniard Jon Rahm shoot 20 under par and claim the win.

See Eldrick Tont Woods -- sometimes known as Tiger -- flail away and finish one under par. A colossal 19 strokes behind. One stroke out of dead last place. Only Japan's Hidecki Matsuyama had a worse score, by one stroke.

See the TV folks continue in their Tiger, ahem, hero worship. Tiger this. Tiger that. They even had the gall to interview him when the match was over. The as usual shameless Woods gladly put his mug in front of the cameras again, and started yapping away.

Eldrick Tont said he didn't play "clean enough"

That's one way of putting it.

Another would be he stunk it up for 72 holes. You don't finish a whopping 19 strokes behind unless you're doing just about everything wrong. In any normal tournament, he would have, mercifully, been cut before the final two rounds of the weekend. But no, Woods got to play, and even collect a check, for his pitiful performance.

And since when do bottom-feeders get interviews on TV? Shouldn't those be reserved for the players that either won, or at least came close?

Did I mention shameless?

Yes, I get it. Like a certain President, Eldrick has his blind followers, who will remain loyal to him no matter how gawd-awful his results. They want him to win. They NEED him to win.

But guess what?

He ain't gonna win. Stick a fork in him. He had his decade of dominance, but it's been over and done with for another decade.

There's way too many hot shot younger golfers out there these days -- and new ones are popping up like weeds in a garden every year -- for Eldrick to make any sort of "comeback". Though they won't publicly say so, does anybody really think the young guns on tour these days consider Woods any sort of threat?

They just tolerate him, because they have to. But also likely dread being partnered with him in any given tournament because of the media circus and the throngs of idiots that continue to follow him around.

I, for one, can't wait until Eldrick Tont Woods shuffles off to the Geezer Circuit, sometimes known as the Champions Tour.

Pity, unlike McCarthy, there's not a way to fire Tiger too.

Wednesday, November 28, 2018

The disappearing and lunacy of boxing

Since maybe the time of WWI, up until maybe the 1980s, boxing was a big deal in America. Over the years people gathered around their radios, black and white TVs, and later on even big screens set up at movie theaters or other venues to watch the action between two notables slugging it out.

The early days were "for free". Then somebody figured out a lot of money could be made by charging people to watch it. And they came, for years. Cha-ching. Your truly included.

All along, there was a lot of back-room wheeling and dealing, shady characters, and even shadier shenanigans afoot that most people knew little, if anything, about going on.

Without a doubt many pugilists became very famous for their skills and prowess in the ring. 

Jack Dempsy, Gene Tierney. Joe Louis. Ray Robinson. Jake LaMotta. Cassius Clay/Mohammed Ali. Joe Frazier. George Foreman. Ray Leonard. Marvin Hagler. Tommy Hearns. Roberto Duran. And Mike Tyson, to name a few.

And then the "sweet science" seemed to quickly lose favor, at least in the public eye. People don't pay near as much attention to boxing as they once did. 

Perhaps it had something to do with the lunacy of pro "wrestling". Sure, we all knew it was pre-choreographed, aka "fake", but the characters in these productions became fan favorites -- or enemies. Good guys and bad guys. A very old theme that has always worked on the idiots. Throw in a lavish production, replete with outrageous costumes, nicknames even comic books of old would have been ashamed of, a few pretty girls prancing around, and -- presto -- next thing ya know you've got a hit on your hands. Plenty of dough too. Oh lord, did the money roll in. 

Nowadays "mixed martial arts" has taken center stage. Unlike wrestling, this is the real deal. People really do get hurt in the octagon. About the only thing that's illegal is biting, or punches/kicks/strikes to the groin area. 

In boxing, when a contestant gets knocked down, the opponent is instructed to go to a neutral corner while the referee checks on the fallen, and begins giving him a "count". Even if he pops right back up, he has to take a "standing eight". 

Not so in MMA. When somebody goes down, the opponent will try to further beat him to death until the referee stops it, lest he might actually kill they guy. Did I mention "real deal"? 

Sometimes it's ludicrous. Like when Floyd Mayweather took on Conor McGregor. Some called it a "fight". But it was no such thing. It was pitty-pat boxing, hands only, Mayweather style. Had this taken place in an octagon with the aforementioned "no holds barred" rules, Mayweather would have been beaten into submission within a minute, not emerge victorious after another of his bore-a-thon performances. 

True, they both made a ton of money off those willing to pony up the ridiculous pay-per-view price. Did I mention idiots?

Fast forward to the present. Does anybody even know who the boxing heavyweight (or any other weight class) champion of the world is these days? Oh wait, that's right. It depends. There's so many different sanctioning bodies around nobody can keep up with them all. Did I mention shady characters and shenanigans?

Turns out, a couple guys named Deonte Wilder and Tyson Fury will be duking it out for some kind of title(s) on December 1. Unless it's called off, of course, due to a last minute injury, another one of those pesky drug results testing positive at the eleventh hour, or somebody's grandma taking deathly ill -- the same one that supposedly died a few years back. 

Nonetheless, these two brutes have impressive records indeed. Wilder is 40-0, with 39 KOs. Fury is 27-0 with 19 KOs.

Something's gotta give.

Time out. How perfect are the names Wilder and Fury for a couple of behemoths set to try and beat each other's brains out in a boxing ring? Yet is appears those are their actual birth names. Go figure.

Thing is, like boxing across the rest of its spectrum, few even know who these guys are. And most could probably couldn't care less.

So why, tell me WHY, are the powers that be going to charge potential viewers $75 to watch the, ahem, fight, on TV? Did I mention lunacy?

Sure, I get it, at least by their twisted reasoning. Because these guys are the best of the best, both undefeated, and it's a, double ahem, classic showdown. Did I mention SUCKERS?

Yet in reality, most people wouldn't tune in if it was shown for free on network television, unless it was in prime time and nothing else decent was on. Who's kidding who?

Worse, even if one was still one of the few boxing fans around, if they couldn't afford the $75, they probably wouldn't even find out who won the dang thing unless they went on-line and did a search a couple days afterwards. TV, radio, and the papers will likely make no mention of it.

It's sad boxing has come to this. Oh how I miss the heady days of Iron Mike biting Evander's ear off.

Or Ali being too chicken to give buy my grill (I did, love it) George a rematch. That rope-a-dope thing was only going to work once. Wasn't this the same Ali that called himself "the greatest"? And he got beat up by Leon Spinks -- LEON SPINKS -- in his prime?

Ah well, It is what it has become.

But once upon a time, it (boxing) was a big deal.

Alas, no more.













Saturday, November 24, 2018

Michigan needs to shut up

The University of Michigan is a first-rate school in many aspects. Academically and athletically. Undergrad and post-grad. Countless numbers of their graduates have gone on to achieve great things in the various aspects of life. My own dentist went to their dental school, and he's the best one I've ever had. They've even got their own world-class hospital.

But it would seem they have an ongoing problem. Arrogance. They just don't know when to shut up, especially the jocks.

Running back Mike Hart became instantly (in)famous for his "little brother" comment towards cross-state rival Michigan State back in 2007. The Spartans would own the Wolverines on the gridiron for the next decade.

Back in the early 90's, it's basketball team featured the Fab Five -- all freshmen. Oh lord, could they talk trash. But in two years together, they would always come up short in the end.

And it would seem they're constantly over-rated. Even this year, it's football team was talking smack. It was all about the "revenge tour". Last year they had suffered losses at the hands of Michigan State, Penn State, and Wisconsin. So they were out to "get" them this time around. Sure enough, they knocked them all off. Thing is, none of those teams were nearly as good this year as last. For various reasons (graduations, pro draft, etc) they had collectively regressed.

Nonetheless, UM had improbably risen to #4 in the national rankings. Talk, and there was a lot of it, was about getting into the national championship playoff. All they had to do was complete their revenge tour and knock off those pesky Buckeyes of Ohio State, which has owned them as well for over a decade. And c'mon, OSU had got clobbered by lowly Purdue to the tune of 30 points worth, PURDUE!!! So how tough could they be?

After that it was off to the Big Ten Conference championship game for a rematch with Northwestern, whom they had already beaten on the road this year. Glory was within reach.

Yet as to how tough could the Buckeyes be? Turns out -- plenty.

The Wolverines were absolutely hammered, embarrassed, humiliated, on the losing end of a 62-39 beat down. Wasn't this the same UM that was supposed to have one of the best defenses in the country? And they gave up 63 points? The Buckeyes were going through them like water through a screen door on a submarine.

UM was roughly a 4 point favorite going in -- and got blistered by 23? As in over three touchdowns worth?

So much for completing the revenge tour.

And that Big Ten title that seemed almost automatic? Gone. They won't be playing in that game. That honor was transferred to Ohio State, also a one conference loss team. But by virtue of their head-to-head victory over UM, that "tie" is obviously broke.

Poof went any national championship aspirations. After being lit up like that on national TV, forget about that #4 ranking as well. The Wolverines could easily tumble out of the top ten, and deservedly so.

So yes, once again, off they'll go to some bowl game that will mean absolutely nothing except a cha-ching for the schools and a chance for the marching bands to strut their stuff in a faraway place. No doubt, it will be hyped to the max like most things Michigan, but in the end a win or a loss will be of little consequence.

Maybe it wouldn't have made any difference if UM showed a little humbleness for a change. As in play and win first. Talk trash if you just have to -- after it's over. Not before.

You'd think they'd learn, but they never do.

And they wonder why so many people around the country consider them arrogant, pompous, blue-blooded gasbags that can never seem to back up their words with actions.

Well duh. For supposedly turning out so many great minds, UM can sure be dense sometimes.

Especially the jocks. 

Thursday, November 22, 2018

Watch Phil and Tiger? Barf

Granted, with all the thousand of TV channels and streamings, a whole lot is available in the world of sports to watch. You name it and it's probably being shown somewhere. Croquet in the Yukon? Cornhole in Zanzibar? It's gotta be on somewhere. Plus there's the dreaded pay-per-view outlets. Which brings me to....

The Phil and Tiger show. Also a question. Who in their right mind would pony up $19.95 to watch a couple of over-the-hill linksters play for nine million bucks? And who's dumb enough to put up all that dough? Make that two questions.

I wouldn't watch this farce if they gave ME $19.95. 

In the red corner we have Philip Alfred Mickelson, now 48 years old and ranked #27 in the world.

In the blue corner we have Eldrick Tont Woods, soon to be 43, and generously ranked #13. Very generously.

Out of all the hot shot golfers on the planet, they came up with these two? Really?

This is trash sports at its finest/worst. A money grabbing scam designed to play upon dim-witted people desperate to watch any sort of competition.

I might consider watching curling in the Congo, or maybe even the ever-popular marathon for those over 100 years old (though it does seem to drag on for quite a while).

But not this.

ANYTHING but this.

And they have the unmitigated gall to actually charge people for it?

Puh-leeze. 

Detroit Lions and Forest Gump

Maybe it's something in the air. Maybe it's an incurable disease the Detroit Lions have had for a long time and passed down through the generations. That might explain the over half-century of futility and, at times, Keystone Koppish ways of the franchise from ownership on down through the front office, to the parade of clown coaches, to the players over the years.

Over fifty Super Bowls played and the Lions have never even appeared in one, let alone win it? A grand total of one -- count it -- ONE playoff victory in all that time? Something must be going on here.

And it appears to have become contagious. How else to explain the recent Forest Gumpish behavior of some of their opponents?

In a game against Green Bay a few weeks ago, the Packers' long reliable place kicker, one Mason Crosby, missed three field goals from inside forty yards -- and an extra point to boot. That's ten points the Packers would normally have had almost automatically. The Lions won that game by 8. Poor Crosby evidently caught the brain-freeze virus from the Lions and it cost his team a game.

Fast forward to the Carolina Panthers game. Its place kicker, Graham Gano, hadn't missed a kick ALL YEAR. Until the Panthers faced the Lions. Then GG wigged out and not only missed a 33 yard field goal attempt, a chip shot, but an extra point as well. The Panthers would lose that game by a single point.

Worse, the retardation apparently set in with Panthers head coach Ron Riveira. In the waning seconds of the game, after a touchdown brought his team within a single point of the Motown Puddytats, incredibly, he went for the two point conversion. What the HELL was he thinking? Or was he capable of it at all?

It failed, of course, and the Lions got yet another improbable win they didn't deserve. Hey, in that situation you take the tie every time and go into overtime, especially when you're clearly the superior team.

In the Thanksgiving day game played earlier, at Detroit, the Chicago Bears went into mental shutdown as well. Only in the first half, Da Bears had scored a touchdown to take a 9-7 lead. Then they became Duh Bears. Instead of kicking the extra point to make it a three point (field goal) margin, they -- you've gotta be kidding me -- went for the two point conversion. And naturally failed. What in the name of Forest Gump were you guys doing? Any five-year-old knows better than that.

I just knew that one point would come back to haunt them.

And as the game went on, it appeared that might indeed come to pass.

Were the Lions about to get yet another win in a game they should have lost, because the other team developed a severe case of special teams stark raving madness?

As it turned out, not.

Enter Lions' quarterback Matthew Stafford, who's been around for almost a decade, has a career losing record, and is yet to win a playoff game, though his salary is among the highest in the entire league. See front office non compos mentis, mentioned above.

Somewhat fittingly, he handed the game right back to the Bears. As the Lions were driving for what could have been the deciding score, their version of the Georgia Peach pulled a bone-head and threw a pick-six. An easy one. A short out pattern a Chicago safety saw coming all the way, swooped in and, presto, touchdown Bears. Piece of cake, when the other guy starts playing as dumb as they cause opponents to get.

So now the Lions are 4-7, bringing up the rear in their division. Even with the "dumb" luck factor on their side, it anybody really surprised?

On to the good news/bad news. The good news is the Lions, having played on Thursday, get 10 whole days off before their next game.

The bad news is two-fold. 1). Their next opponent is the LA Rams, arguably the best team in the league, and 2) they had a bye week this week. Having played on Monday night against the KC Chiefs, the Rams will get 13 days off.

The chances of the Lions beating the high-flying Rams? Logically, probably zero. It should be a blow-out. A romp.

But ya never know when the Lions will give the dreaded instant brick or potted plant syndrome to an opponent again.

Thankfully, after being afflicted, other teams seem to defeat the insidious disease after they get away from the source -- the Lions.

But the Motowners appear stuck with it for life.

Well over fifty years and counting speaks for itself.....

Wednesday, November 21, 2018

REALLY dumb things

Overheard on the Sunday night game between the Chicago Bears and Minnesota Vikings: "When you've got defensive linemen coming free around the ends, and tackles rushing unblocked up the middle -- that's a problem for the quarterback".

Well dang, Cris Collinsworth, you're a GENIUS!!. Give that man a raise, or at least a gold star on his forehead. We'd have NEVER figured that out.

Next thing ya know, CC will be telling us a tornado setting down in the middle of a trailer park doesn't always produce the optimum results for the residents there. A regular Einstein in the making, that one.

A local sports columnist, himself a grad of Michigan State, penning a Sunday article about how Michigan didn't look so good while defeating Indiana by only 11 points, but totally ignoring his alma mater getting unceremoniously dumped at lowly Nebraska. Ah yes, he can deny it all he wants but that green blood still courses through his veins.

And I know he reads this blog, because all too often in the past, the gists of my posts seem to magically appear under his byline a day or two later, tweaked ever so slightly. Can you hear me now CP? Once or twice I can pass off as coincidence. Perhaps even "great minds, ahem -- lol -- think alike".  But after 10, 15, 20 times, I began to smell a rat. Didn't they teach you anything about crediting your sources in journalism school? Bet I don't see this one showing up in your column any day soon.

So OK, Lebron James made the big leap to LA-LA land. No doubt, he'll get paid another bazillion dollars, hang out with movie stars, and probably get a few roles of his own.

But if he thinks he can whip that rag-tag bunch into any sort of NBA title contenders, he's dumber than the whole premise of this post.

Speaking of Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum, consider Hue Jackson and Marvin Lewis. The former has been a loser his entire life, starting way back when he was player at Pacific. After bouncing around losing organizations in the NFL, we know him from his infamous reign as head coach of the Cleveland Browns. In three years, he compiled a record of 3-36-1, by FAR the losingest percentage in the history of the league. Finally, mercifully, for their fans at least, the Browns finally gave him the boot. No matter who they brought in next, he couldn't possibly be worse than THAT guy.

So what happened? Enter Marvin Lewis, long-time head coach of the Cincinnati Bengals. Dear Marv's been there fifteen -- count-em -- FIFTEEN years -- and hasn't won a playoff game. Even the sad-sack Detroit Lions don't put up with incompetence for that long. (Though they'll just hire the NEXT incompetent, bound for the trash heap in a few years).

Lewis then -- incredibly -- took Jackson in as a "special assistant" to himself. How in the world hiring a lifetime loser can possibly help another long-time underachieving coach and team would seem to be a very good question.

Or maybe it's just plain dumb.

REALLY dumb.

And I think that's where I came in, so.....

I'm out.




Monday, November 19, 2018

Rams and Chiefs. Insanity

Last I looked the over/under on the Monday night game pitting the LA Rams against the KC Chiefs was around 63. That's a whole lot of points in an NFL game.

But anybody that watched it saw a final score 54-51, with Rams prevailing. Even my feeble brain can do that math. 105 points?

It's rare when ANY NFL team scores fifty. But BOTH of them? Insanity.

They blew by the "over" after three quarters of play.

Which would seem to beg the question ---

Can either one of these teams play a lick of defense?

Sure, we've seen a bunch of rule changes that have given offenses greater advantages. Nobody seems to know how to tackle a quarterback any more without getting penalized. Can't hit him high. Can't hit him low. Can't fall on him. Breathe on a receiver running his route and the defender will be called for holding or pass interference.

Yes, it's fun to watch a shoot-out like this one, though it probably gives defensive coordinators nightmares. And it could well be this game was a Super Bowl preview. Both LA and KC are among the best in their conferences, but ya never know come playoff time. Those pesky Patriots will be there. (Has there ever been a division as pitiful as the rest of the AFC East -- Buffalo, Miami, and the NYJ, for so long?). As will the ageless Drew Brees and the newly rekindled New Orleans express. Never count the Steelers out.

And injuries to key players are always a crap shoot. Again, ya never know when disaster might strike.

A lot of stuff can happen between now and mid-January -- and probably will.

But for now, dang. 54-51?

Bet we won't see another spectacle like that for a while. If ever.

But the fans had to love it.

It surely beats a 6-3 snooze fest in a blizzard.




Saturday, November 17, 2018

A sucker bet and -- SAY WHAT??

The people that set the wagering "lines" for sports games should have known better. Any idiot could see they got it horribly wrong.

That would be Indiana getting a whopping 28 1/2 points in the recently concluded game against Michigan. When yours truly saw that particular line, it jumped out at me and said -- here's some easy money.

Now, I'm not much of a wagering man any more, though I used to be. Won a few, lost a few. Goes with the territory. But this was too good to pass up. Michigan beating Indiana by over 4 touchdowns? Not a chance.

Let me list the reasons why.

1). Michigan, playing at home against a blah team, was likely taking this game as a lay-up, and already looking forward to their big showdown with Ohio State next Saturday. An underwhelming performance could almost be expected.

2). Sure, UM is ranked #4 in the country and has a shot at the national playoffs if they stay clean their next two games. But Indiana's not that bad.

3). In recent times, the Hoosiers have a history of playing the Wolverines tough. True, UM always seems to win the games, but they've been close, typically within the 6-8 point range. A far cry from 28 1/2. That's a whole lot of points.

So I jumped on it. Gimme Indiana and the points. Easiest C-note I've made in a long time.

Elsewhere, massive stupidity was on full display.

In the Michigan State/Nebraska game, the Huskers had beaten the Sparties in a snowstorm in Lincoln. All that remained was for their quarterback to "take a knee" as the remaining seconds wound down off the clock.

So why -- tell me WHY -- was the Nebraska QB taking snaps in the shotgun formation instead of under center? Say what? The latter is a failsafe play, but the former has risk involved. And sure enough, it almost happened. See the center's snap go way high. The QB had to leap for it to snag it down. If they fumble there, and MSU recovers, they get another shot at pulling out the game.

What kind of idiot coaching was this on the part of Nebraska? Didn't their QB know how to take a snap under center?  The most basic of quarterbacking basics? No wonder the Huskers stink at football any more.

Speaking of Michigan looking forward to their big showdown next week -- the Buckeyes almost got caught napping as well.

We all remember not long ago Ohio State got absolutely trashed at lowly Purdue. Good-bye any national championship aspirations.

But there they were at lowly Maryland, another Big 10 bottom feeder. And they almost got beat. Probably SHOULD have got beat.

It took the Buckeyes going into overtime to finally overcome the Terrapins. And their defense was shredded throughout. It seems as if ever since Nick Bosa, younger brother of Joey, walked away mid-season -- heretofore unheard of -- to prepare for the NFL draft -- the wheel have come off the once mighty Buckeyes. Can one defensive lineman really have that much of an impact? Or have they been over-rated all along?

Beats me. But if they've still "got game", you can bet it will all come out against Michigan when they show up in the Horseshoe next Saturday.

Should be a dandy.

Huh. Wonder what the spread will be on that game?

But I think that's where I came in. And no, I won't be placing a wager on that one. I'll take my Franklin this week and be happy.

Like the Outlaw Josey Wales once famously said -- A man's got to know his limitations.




Saturday, November 10, 2018

Detroit Lions. Season on the brink

Though they all count the same, it seems some games are more important than others. Such would be the case with the upcoming Detroit Lions/Chicago Bears showdown this Sunday.

If the Lions lose that game, and they're roughly a touchdown underdog, they can pretty well kiss the 2018 season good-bye. Not that this will be anything new, far from it, given their sorry history, but there were those that thought maybe, just maybe, they'd find a way to get into the playoffs this year.

However, if they go down in flames in Chicago, the Lions would find themselves at 3-6 and a full three games behind the Bears in the NFC North with only seven games left to play.

The following week paints an even more grim scenario when the Carolina Panthers come to Detroit. Cam Newton and Co. had been rolling right along at 6-2, in the thick of the playoff hunt. And then they went to Pittsburgh -- where they were absolutely thrashed 52-21 by the Steelers.

Needless to say, Carolina is likely a little pissed off right about now and will be wanting to take it out on somebody. And let's face it, they're a better team than the Lions anyway.

On top of that, the Panthers, having just played on Thursday night, will get an extra three days rest (and game planning) before they lock horns with the Motown Puddy Tats.

If the Lions were to lose that one, entirely possible, if not probable, they'd be 3-7 and even the most koolaided Honolulu blue and silver folks would find it difficult to see any salvation in sight.

True, later down the road they have a couple "patsy" games against the likes of the Buffalo Bills and Arizona Cardinals. Both those teams stink.

But they also have to play the LA Rams, whom many think are the best team in the entire league. Chances of winning that one? Mighty slim. Plus a rematch with the Minnesota Vikings, another superior team, and a trip to Green Bay, always an ordeal, especially in the dead of winter (Dec. 30) when it will likely be absolutely frigid. The Lions being an indoor team doesn't help them any in such environs.

So yes, the coming game with the Bears would appear to be the brink for the Lions. If they win, they're still technically "alive". But lose, and things start looking mighty ugly.

No pressure.

Then again, they ARE still the Lions, right?

So who in their right mind would expect much of them?

History, over a half century of it, says otherwise. A grand total of one measly playoff victory since Super Bowls started way back in 1967. When Lyndon Johnson was still President. The Vietnamese "Tet Offensive" hadn't happened yet. Martin Luther King and Bobby Kennedy were still alive. How long ago was that?

One of only four teams to have never even reached the Super Bowl, let alone won it. And the other three are/were "expansion" teams.

So yeah, in that respect, it's just another year for the ever sad sack Lions.

Yawn.


Thursday, November 8, 2018

More idle thoughts

He prattles on about them enough. I wish somebody would give Scott Van Pelt a "bad beat". Or at least make him tap out on the air. Just once. Old peanut head is WAY overdue for a serious go-round in the woodshed.

There's that stupid commercial again hawking a certain brand of cars. "These are real people, not actors", it claims. What a bunch of hooey. By reading from a script written by others, that MAKES them actors. And they're "real people" as opposed to what? Klingons? Cocker spaniels? Potted plants? Please.

Is Bryce Harper nuts? How else to explain anybody turning down a 10-year deal worth $300,000,000? Guaranteed money at that. The only thing yours truly can figure is he must want out of Washington D.C. -- BAD. Could he get even more from another team? Maybe. Maybe not. Still, the dude hit .250 this last season. Since when is that worth mega-bucks?

Or maybe it's the Nationals that have gone plum loco. Harper's now 26  years old. The next 4-5 seasons should theoretically be his "peak" years. But who's to say he won't get seriously hurt, perhaps as early as next year? He could blow out a knee, get beaned at the plate, any number of things, and never be the same. Ya never know. Yet the Nats are betting big bucks he'll still be a super-star all the way through age 35. And he's not even that status now. Just a good looking dude that hits maybe 20 homers and drives in 75 runs a year. Good, but hardly great. .250? What are they thinking?

Don't look now but Dez Bryant, formerly of the Dallas Cowboys, just fell into a proverbial rose garden, without the thorns. After Big D cast the former receiver supreme into purgatory (and this has Jerry Jones written all over it), Dez woke up in New Orleans with the Saints. And now will have Drew Brees (arguably the best passing QB ever ) throwing to him. If he fits in, and Sean Payton is a no-nonsense type of head coach, the Saints just went from very good to formidable. Definitely Super Bowl contenders.

Didn't they just knock off the LA Rams, who many think are the class of the NFC? Although one is left to wonder just how, pray tell, they managed to lose their opener, at home no less, to the lowly Tampa Bay Bucs. But look out for these guys now if everybody stays healthy.

Cam Newton. This guy's quite the piece of work. He can be sensational on the field. Or stink it up to hog heaven. But at this writing the Carolina Panthers are sailing right along at 6-2.

The thing about Cam is --- his wardrobe. Many say he's quite the dapper dresser. A regular fashion plate.

Yet others could easily claim some of those outfits he's been seen wearing evince a totally different persona. We've all heard of Playboy and Playgirl magazines. Is there one out there called Playpimp? If so, Cam would fit right in as a cover boy for such a rag. GQ? If it stands for Gangstas Quarterly, Mr. Newton is their guy when it comes to off the field attire. Some of that stuff is blinding.

I keep seeing this internet article about what to do if your dog eats grass. That's one thing. But it's REALLY time to worry if you catch the pooch smoking it.

Uh oh. The Panthers/Steelers game is on. Two good teams. Gotta go.....






Monday, November 5, 2018

Detroit Lions and the usual delusions

Though I used to be one -- long suffering at that -- I quit cold turkey on being a Detroit Lions fan roughly 20 years ago. I honestly can't remember how many of their games I went to at the now demolished Silverdome, but it was a lot. Maybe 40 over the years? And yeah, I was there when they trounced the Dallas Cowboys back in 91 or 92, I forget, for the only playoff win in their sorry history.

But when Barry Sanders had seen enough of the incompetence and losing ways, and took a hike while leaving countless millions of dollars on the table -- not to mention the all-time NFL rushing record well within his grasp -- that was good enough for me. I walked with him and haven't looked back. If anything, I root against them these days. Mostly just chuckle at their on-going ineptitude. And oh my, I've save countless thousands of dollars by doing so. No regrets.

Yes, I used to be one of the sappies that thought every year was going to be THE year. But it never was, of course. Like a mirage in the desert or the end of a rainbow. Easy to believe in, but always staying out of reach.

So it comes as no great surprise to yours truly that the Motown Puddy Tats currently find themselves with a 3-5 record with yet another season poised to go on the ever-growing scrap heap.

First they got absolutely torched -- at home -- by the lowly NY Jets. Then off to San Fran, where the not-so-good 49ers handed them another L.

I'm still flabbergasted that they somehow, incredibly, managed to defeat the New England Patriots in Week 3. Were Brady/Bellichick and Co. under the influence of mind altering drugs? How in the hell did THAT happen?

Then down to Big D, where another so-so at best Cowboy team beat them.

That should have been just about enough.

But no. The Green Bay Packers and, in particular, their place kicker, were going to hand the Lions a miracle win the following week.

Mason Crosby, one of the longest tenured kickers in the league, and arguably one of the most reliable, somehow managed to miss three easily makeable field goals, and an extra point try to boot, no pun intended. Did he get into whatever it was that made the Pats go goofy in Detroit?

That's 10 points the Packers would normally have had. The Lions would win that game by 8.

After a win against a still, and seemingly always lousy Miami team, Lions fans had hope -- again. Sigh. Suckers.

Until the Seattle Seahawks smacked them down the following week. Again at home.

The recently concluded Minnesota Viking game showed just how terrible the Lions remain.

Vaunted QB Matthew Stafford couldn't even manage a single touchdown?

And he got sacked ten -- count-em -- TEN times? In ONE game?

Dang.

The Viking defensive front is OK, maybe even pretty good. But it's not like they're the Steel Curtain Pittsburgh once had, the Doomsday D featured by Dallas long ago, the Killer Bees of the Dolphins, Da Bears awesome 46 defense of 1985, or even the Purple People Eaters the same Vikings had way back in the 70s.

Ten sacks? Who or what were those guys in the three-point stance in front of Stafford on every play? Professional offensive linemen, or cardboard cut-outs of same?

Ten sacks? The next guy to be sacked ought to be the O-line coach.

But you just know what's going to happen.

The Lions will win a couple more games, just enough to give the sappies another shot at "hope".

They've still got home and away games against the Bears, though the Chitown brutes seem to be showing a bit of spunk this year.

And a couple of truly awful teams in the Buffalo Bills and Arizona Cardinals later on.

But c'mon. Get real. They're still "the same old Lions".

They made a General Manager out of Bob Quinn that was never more than a scout for New England. It's showed.

They hired a President that was -- wait for it -- a handler of estates. You know, wills, inheritances, trust funds and the like. And put him in charge of the whole operation, though he freely admitted he didn't know squat about the workings of an NFL team. This has also showed.

Just about the time George W. Bush was coming into the presidency, another disaster waiting to happen -- it did -- the Lions had their golden chance to turn their sorry ways around. A man named Bill Parcells was out there, and available. They should have offered him whatever he wanted. Complete control, name his salary, and sign him to a long term contract. Give him 10, 20 million a year. Who cares? It's not like the owning Ford family couldn't afford it. And there's no salary cap on coaches or front office personnel. Parcells knew NFL football through and through.

But no. They went out and got Matt Millen. And stuck with him for eight years. He didn't know anything, just talked a mean game. And the sappies bought it. It was the equivalent of throwing a depression on top of a recession. Down the tubes they went -- even further -- again.

Receiver supreme Calvin Johnson played a decade for the sad sack Lions and never knew what it felt like to win a playoff game. Poor dude arrived just in time for an historic 0-16 season. Welcome to Detroit Megatron. Are you having fun yet? He finally took a hint from Barry and walked in his prime as well, with enough dough in the bank and his body still healthy. Smart guy.

Matthew Stafford, for all the gaudy passing stats he's racked up over the years -- still hasn't won a playoff game. And his career record is well under .500. In fact, at 63-73, and about to turn 31 years old, it's doubtful he'll ever get above that mark. Especially with the sorry state the team, in all respects, remains.

Their local media peddling the usual snake oil/koolaid aside, the Lions are not a good team.

Not even close.

But it's just another year. After over a half-century of bumbling in every way conceivable, does it really even matter?













Saturday, November 3, 2018

Michigan football. In the playoffs -- for now

You could almost see the proverbial handwriting on the wall. Michigan, ranked #5, was going to move into the magical top four when the day was over.

Dispatching (and avenging last year's loss) Penn State in their Big House by the tune of 42-7 was quite an impressive show. Sort of. The Nittany Lions were obviously over-matched and UM still runs the same boring offensive plays, blows time-outs for no good reason, takes way too many stupid penalties, and lacks a decent place kicker. Just the usual for the Wolverines.

But their defense is pretty good. So far, against the teams they've faced to date, none of which has been particularly stalwart. Save the opener against Notre Dame -- which they lost.

Yet other things fell in place for them. Predictably, #1 Alabama not only defeated Louisiana State -- but thrashed them 29-0 -- on the road no less. The former #3 Tigers will certainly fall in the rankings, especially with this being their second loss.

Yep, #2 Clemson absolutely pummeled a hapless Louisville team 77-16. SEVENTY SEVEN POINTS? Wow. Yours truly can't remember ANY team scoring more than that. Needless to say, their #2 ranking remains safe.

#4 Notre Dame managed to get by an unranked and pretty much blah Northwestern team 31-21. But it's Notre Dame. Any excuse to keep them alive for the playoffs will do, and after all, it was a win.

So add it all up and what do you have?

Michigan is now in the top four -- or at least should be.

Next, they face lowly Rutgers on the road, then back home for always patsy Indiana. If the Wolverines can keep away from their sometimes nasty habit of dropping a game they should otherwise win handily, it will set up the biggie.

Ohio State on the road, Nov. 24.

True, the Buckeyes themselves have already blown their playoff chances. Once mega-stud defensive lineman Joey Bosa took a midseason hike to prepare for the draft (has anybody ever done that before?) the wheels seemed to come off. How else to explain the beat-down they took at Purdue? Four touchdowns worth? To the Boilermakers? Ouch, Urban Meyer. That had to smart.

And the Buckeyes had their hands full with mediocre at best Nebraska, before finally escaping with a ho-hum 31-21 win. Didn't matter. After the Purdue fiasco, OSU is a non-factor, except for...

The Michigan game. No matter what else has happened, you just know the Buckeyes will be sky high and geeked when the Wolverines come to town.

And Jim Harbaugh has never beaten Urban Meyer and the Buckeyes.

If the Maize/Blue crowd wants a shot at the big dance, this is the game they absolutely have to win. Their big chance at potential glory -- or at least a spot in the national semi-finals. The odds of them knocking off either Bama or Clemson at that point would appear to be mighty slim, at best. But first things first.

It will be a tall order in Columbus.

When it rolls around in three weeks, we shall see.

Tuesday, October 30, 2018

Central Florida and the raw deal

Through no fault of their own, the football Knights of Central Florida look like they're going to get jobbed again this year. The powers that be won't let them within sniffing distance of a shot at greatness -- in other words -- the four team playoff for the national championship.

Currently UCF sits at #12 in the rankings, far out of contention. Yet they're one of few teams that remain undefeated this year. A perfect 7-0 so far.

They want us to believe that the Gators from Florida deserve a higher ranking, even though they already been beaten twice this year? How does that work?

Ditto for Ohio State. They got absolutely slaughtered at unranked Purdue, as in four touchdowns worth, but the Buckeyes are supposedly better than the Knights?  Get outta here.

Yeah, I get the argument. UCF plays in a "lesser" conference, so they shouldn't be taken as seriously as those schools in"power" conferences.

But how do we know how good they are unless they're given a chance?

Last season they went a perfect 13-0, including beating a top ten Auburn team in the Peach Bowl. Isn't Auburn in the "mighty" SEC? That game in itself showed the Knights can hang with the "big boys".

Though they would finish ranked #6 last year, which is also a statement validating they're football worthiness, they're going to get a raw deal this year too. Even if they go undefeated -- again.

There's a reason UCF won't be allowed anywhere near the top five. Because if they were, and a team ranked ahead of them lost in the last game of the regular season, or a conference championship game, it would be nigh impossible to keep the Knights out of the Big Dance.

Let's get real. The folks behind the scenes (see TV executives) would much rather see high profile teams like Notre Dame, Alabama, Clemson, Michigan, and the like. They would claim their beloved "ratings" would be higher, hence enabling them to charge more for advertising -- see cha-ching.

But is that really true?

If UCF were to get a shot at the four team playoff, might not millions of fans tune in to see how a Cinderella team would fare against traditional behemoths? And wouldn't they be an overwhelming sentimental favorite as well?

True, the Knights might get blown out of the stadium 100-0, and the I-told-you-soers would be screaming from the rooftops. But what if -----  the Knights just happened to pull off a victory?

Only one way to find out. BTW, wasn't it "conventional wisdom" that the mighty Baltimore Colts with Johnny Unitas and Co. were going to annihilate the upstart NY Jets of Joe Willy Namath -- to the tune of 270-0? How did that work out in Super Bowl III?

If they run the table this year, I will never understand why a team that's been undefeated two years running can't seem to get any respect.

Give them a shot, especially if a couple of the teams making the Final Four have a loss on their record.

It's only righteous.




Monday, October 29, 2018

The post-2000 Boston dominance

Everybody knows the Boston Red Sox just got done winning the World Series by knocking off the LA Dodgers. But the bigger picture shows just how dominating the sports teams from Beantown have been in recent times.

This is the 4th World Series triumph for the Bosox since they finally broke the "curse" of the Bambino in 2004.

The New England Patriots have won 5 Super Bowls in the Brady/Belichick era.

The Boston Celtics won the NBA crown in 2008.

And the Boston Bruins chipped in with a Stanley cup in 2011.

Now if my extraordinary Jethro Bodine ciphering talents haven't escaped me -- that adds up to eleven world titles since the millennial.

No other city is even close to matching that. Some don't even have a single title. Others can claim maybe one, and a few less than a handful.

The city of champions indeed. And the Celtics are definitely trending upwards. GM Danny Ainge has done a masterful job of building their roster for the long term. If Kevin Durant of the Golden State Warriors opts out after this year, as many think he will, the Celtics may well become the beasts of the NBA -- again.

Can that be right? Tom Brady has won more games AGAINST the Buffalo Bills than all but three quarterbacks have won while playing FOR them? Dang, talk about owning somebody.

#12 had 28 Ws against the BBs since he entered the league about the same time the 9/11 disaster struck. Oops, he and the Pats just knocked them off again on Monday Night Football. Make that 29.

True, they may talk a bit funny in Beantown, at least to a mid-westerner such as myself, but there can be no doubt about their winning ways.

No matter how one slices or dices it, eleven titles in eighteen years, spread across all four major sports, is mighty impressive stuff.









Sunday, October 28, 2018

Boston Red Sox. World Champions

Well, sort of. At least they beat the best the United States and Toronto had to offer. Could they defeat the best Cuba, the Dominican Republic, or Japan could come up with? We'll never know.

Nevertheless, all hail the baseball team from Beantown. They were obviously the class of the Major Leagues this season, and it wasn't even a close call.

And good-bye, dare I say good riddance to those pain in the butt LA Dodgers. See ya Manny Machado, dirty player that you are. Adios Yasiel Puig, the Cuban hot dog. Hey Clayton (Kershaw). How did it feel getting smacked around by that line-up? Turns out, you ain't all that after all.

And go away, Magic Johnson. You've milked your small ownership stake in the Dodgers for all it was worth. Take a hike Irvin. And don't forget your HIV meds. Or maybe do. Your schtick got old a long time ago.

It is good to see a gritty team knock off a bunch of mega-hyped prima donnas from la-la land. It only adds to the satisfaction a working stiff felt when they took down the NY Yankees a while back.

Well done indeed.

Yours truly is going book a flight to Logan. Love that town.

Let the parade in Boston begin.


Friday, October 26, 2018

Michigan in the playoffs?

Maybe. Depends. Do they "control their own destiny"? Not necessarily.

The season opening loss @ Notre Dame wasn't an absolute deal-breaker, because one-loss teams are no strangers to the college football playoffs. See Alabama just last year. They even lost "late" (to Auburn), but only fell from #1 ro #4, hence they still got in. And we know how that turned out. One could hardly begrudge them the championship after wading through formidable competition like Clemson and Georgia in the post-season.

Right now, Michigan sits at #5. Still on the outside looking in. In other words, even if they stay clean in their remaining regular season games, they need help elsewhere. And their game on Nov. 24 @ Ohio State is even huger than normal. Sure, the former #2 ranked Buckeyes took a serious tumble in the polls, and rightly so after getting pummeled by an unranked Purdue team. No matter what they do from here out, no way can they overcome such a colossal misstep to make the playoffs.

Yet you can bet they'll give Michigan all they can handle. Head coach Urban Meyer is yet to lose to the hated Wolverines and him and his boys won't go down easy this year either.

But what if Michigan were to win that game (and stay clean against the likes of Penn State, Rutgers and Indiana in the interim)? Would that get them into the coveted #4 spot, or even higher? Not necessarily.

As mentioned above, even a one-loss Alabama (currently undefeated) will get in. Nobody would question they're one of the top four teams in the nation.

The same is pretty much true with Clemson. Their only remaining game against any sort of serious competition is coming up @ Florida State. And the 'Noles aren't even ranked.

Enter Notre Dame. The Irish are currently #3 and won't face any serious challenges the rest of the season either. (Their last game @USC could be tricky, but the Trojans haven't been any good since Pete Carroll ran a dirty program, got caught, which left the school facing the proverbial woodshed, then bailed north to the Seattle Seahawks).

The thing about Notre Dame is it's a very polarizing school. People either love them or hate them. But one thing's for sure. They have a lot of friends in high places. If there's a way to get Notre Dame in the playoffs, you can bet they'll find it. Plus, being an independent football school, they don't have to worry about playing any sort of conference championship game. They get to rest while other power teams are beating each others' brains out.

So far, Bama, Clemson and ND look good for the playoffs. That only leaves one spot.

Enter Louisiana State, currently #4. True, they got beat by Florida for their only loss, but that hasn't been enough to knock them out of the Big Four.

However, their next game is against mighty Alabama. And that single contest may well determine whether Michigan gets in or not.

Michigan might well find themselves in the situation of rooting for Alabama, Because if they were to defeat the LSU Tigers, the latter would then have two losses. Good-bye playoffs. If LSU were to prevail, it wouldn't knock Bama out (unless it was a blow-out -- and THAT'S not going to happen)

Yet it might very well be the difference-maker no matter WHAT Michigan does in their remaining games, including a conference championship game. If LSU gets by Bama, nobody's going to dispute they deserve a spot in the playoffs.

But first things first. After such a heady win @ arch-rival Michigan State, the Wolverines can't let their guard down at home against the Nittany Lions of PSU. Saquon Barkley or not, those guys aren't exactly patsies.

Yep, the first couple weeks in December are going to get really interesting in college football. There's a whole lot of different possibilities regarding how the four team playoffs shake out.

And Georgia still lurks, to boot. The Dawgs ain't out of it yet either.

{Which just screams for the NCAA to expand the field to eight].

Michigan making it in is possible. But not likely. Even if they were to knock off OSU (and I'll believe that if and when I see it), there's still a lot of ways they won't get invited to the Big Dance.

I'd give them one chance in three.

But even if they get there, does anybody really think they'd have a prayer of knocking off the likes of might Alabama, or even Clemson?

No way.












Wednesday, October 24, 2018

Bosox, Dodgers, and dumb umps

My boss, sometimes known as an editor, used to often tell me remaining impartial is always a good idea. Then I think he finally gave up. I was hopeless. So I'm not. Never have been. Ain't gonna be anytime soon either.

I like most everything about Boston, including the Red Sox.

I dislike most everything about Los Angeles, including the Dodgers.

So there.

Obviously, I have a favorite in this year's World Series. Big time.

Hence, it is with no small amount of joy to find the Red Sox leading the dastardly Dodgers two games to none in this year's Fall Classic.

Better yet, the Bosox have knocked off LA's two best starting pitchers. Clayton Kershaw and Hyun-Jin Ryu. True, they still have Walker Buehler, no slouch, waiting in the wings. But the Sox got by with aging pitcher David Price, long a post-season liability, in Game Two. They have recent Cy Young winner Rick Porcello on deck.

Though it's a tad premature, I, for one, don't think the Dodgers can beat Boston the necessary four of the remaining five to come out on top. The Bosox were far and away the best team in the Major Leagues this year for a reason. They're flat-out good. Loaded. Also confident right about now, as the series heads west to LA LA Land.

I'm also sick and tired of a few things LA related. Magic Johnson, for one. He's a part owner of the Dodgers, so that only adds to my distaste for them.

I've had it with Manny Machado's dirty play on the field, while continuing to feign innocence. And every time I see Yasiel Puig, the Cuban hot dog lucky to even BE in the country, wag his tongue like some sort of retarded basset hound, I want to see a small bird fly into his gaping arrogant mouth. And take a dump while there.

Here's something yours truly has never quite understood. What's the deal with two extra umpires being added for post-season games? You've seen them. They're stationed down the left and right field foul lines. Given Major League Baseball is a multi-billion dollar industry, if these guys were necessary why doesn't the league deploy them in regular season games? It's not like they can't afford them. Aren't they equally important? After all, one blown call (which costs a team a single game) can make the difference between whether they make it into the playoffs in the first place. (See the tie-breakers that had to be played this year).

But that's not the point. All the "line" umps have to do is turn around when a ball is hit over their head down the line and determine whether it was fair or foul. A simple enough job. Even an idiot like me could do it.

Thing is, this is nothing the first and third base umpires couldn't do, like they have to throughout the season. The "line" umps are typically only 20-30 feet behind them.

But wait a second, you say? It's absolutely imperative to get such calls right in the playoffs, much less the World Series?

Indeed it is. But when one considers how many cameras are trained on every play from different angles and the availability of super slo-mo hi-def replays to sort it out correctly by supposedly neutral folks in a booth somewhere, it's dang near impossible to get it wrong. It's either fair or foul. Not that tough of a call in the first place.

These guys are unnecessary baggage. For show only.

In the end, here's to the Bosox. Luv ya. And boo-hiss to anything Los Angeles.

As for the above-mentioned Porcello, the likely starter in Game 3 on Friday?

Give em the heater, Rickey.

Sorry. Couldn't help it. Loved that movie.








Saturday, October 20, 2018

Ohio State #2? Not any more

There's upsets, and there's big upsets. And then there's you gotta be kidding me upsets. No way.

The latter would seem to be the case in the recently concluded Ohio State/Purdue football game.

So there were the mighty Buckeyes, undefeated, ranked #2 in the nation, and no doubt thinking about getting back into the four team playoffs at the end of the season for the national championship.

It should have been a cakewalk for them to go into Purdue and face the so-so 3-3 Boilermakers. The oddsmakers had the Buckeyes a 12 1/2 point favorite, and yours truly thought the spread should have been even larger. Shows you what I know.

In the end, not only did Ohio State get beat, they got trashed. Taken to the proverbial woodshed.

A final score of 49-22 doesn't lie. It was a beatdown. So if I have this right, the wise guys missed the mark by a whopping 41 1/2 points. Wow. Does that mean somebody might be sleeping with the fishes before the night is over?

Purdue clobbered OSU by four -- count em -- FOUR touchdowns? Get outta here.

They are joyous in West Lafayette, Indiana and well they should be. Let the party rage on.

Back in Columbus, Ohio, the Buckeye faithful are no doubt in a state of shock. How the HELL could this happen?

So Urban Meyer and company can say good-bye to any hopes of reaching the above mentioned playoffs.

And that #2 ranking?

Gone. Long gone.

After being drubbed so badly by an unranked team, they'll be lucky if they stay in the Top Ten.

Oh my. Who could have seen this coming?



Michigan football. Overrated again?

Even though they were favored, it almost seemed like an upset when Michigan beat cross state rival Michigan State. The Spartans have had the Wolverines' number in recent years. But bop them they did, in East Lansing, no less. For this feat, UM gets to claim the Paul Bunyan trophy/award/cabbage patch doll/whatever it is.

To no one's great surprise, Michigan is highly ranked. Again. #6 going into the game. For whatever reason, the voters that decide such things always seem to look kindly on the Wolverines. And they're typically not worthy of it. On the rare occasion UM has to play a really good team, they're usually exposed, and not in a good way.

But credit where credit is due -- so far. Other than a close loss at Notre Dame, the Maize and Bluers have done well for themselves this year, the 21-7 thumping of Mich State included.

Yet they're far from a really good team themselves. The penalties they took during the MSU game were glaring. Personal fouls here, unsportsmanlike conduct there. Roughing the passer, etc., etc., etc.

Though it wasn't enough to torpedo them against the not-so-good Spartans, this will not work when they run into stiff competition.

Next up (after a bye week) the Wolverines get Penn State back in Ann Arbor. But the Nittany Lions don't look anywhere near as good as they were last year. Even Mich State handled them, on the road, just last week.

Defeating PSU is a must if UM wants to maintain even an outside shot at making the four teams playoffs this year. True, a long shot, but if they get help elsewhere -- ya never know -- it's still theoretically possible.

After that, two patsies in Rutgers and Indiana.

And then the big one.

@ Ohio State.

True to recent form, the Buckeyes have been rolling right along this year. So this will be a mighty tall order for Jim Harbaugh and his Wolverines on Nov. 24.

UM is going to have to be a whole lot better than they showed against MSU when that game comes about, or they'll get blown out. They might anyway.

Besides cleaning up the stupid penalties, UM seems stuck in a rut running truly boring offensive plays. That three yards and a cloud of dust/mouthful of turf stuff isn't going to get it when they visit the Horseshoe in Columbus.

OSU has pretty much had their way with UM in recent times. They've won the last six in a row, and 15 out of the last 17. That's dominance, owning somebody.

And given the Buckeyes are a top 3 in the country team this year doesn't bode well for UM either.

Yeah, they could conceivably pull an upset, and it would be a big one.

But not unless they get a whole lot better in the next month or so.

Because if they play like they did against Mich. State, with the penalties and ho-hum game plan, that game could get seriously ugly -- for UM.

An aside. Though UM quarterback Shea Patterson is supposed to be all that, one is left to wonder sometimes. On one play he rolled out to his right, saw nobody open (throw the ball away), rolled out further, still nobody open (THROW THE DAMN BALL!!!) and finally ran out of bounds -- for a 6 yard loss. What the hell was he thinking?

Urban Meyer would dearly love to see Patterson make bone-headed plays like that.