Sumo diving

Olympic fans have certainly been treated to some mighty impressive stuff when it comes to the divers. No, not the ones in the NBA or NHL who go down faking agony every time an opponent breathes on them. I'm talking about the real divers. The boys and girls that jump into the deep end of the pool.

It's almost unbelievable what they can do. I highly salute these athletes for the years of dedication, skill, and perseverance that are required to reach the level of near perfection they are capable of. But be honest. After a while, after you've seen a whole slew of somersaults and twists -- doesn't it get a little boring? 

Much has been said about the competitors assuming the "pike" position during the course of some of their dives. That shouldn't be too tough, considering all the divers seem to have the bodies of REAL pikes. The game fish. Both glide through the water and are bony. They also seem to have the same look in their eyes once they're hauled out of the water -- but I could be wrong about that.

Nevertheless, the diving competition would get a lot more entertaining if the people in charge of the Olympics used their imagination.

Sumo diving. The big fellas. Sumo wrestling's not an Olympic sport, but how fun would it be to see those same guys in their thongs jumping into the pool? Forget the springboard competition because they'd snap that off like a twig. Put them up on the high platform, and nevermind the somersaults and fancy twists. A "cannonball" contest. Consider 500-600 pound men plunging into a pool after having jumped from 3 stories up. Sure, a mini-tsunami would wash up into the crowd -- but how entertaining would THAT be to watch? Even the judging would be simple. Instead of all the technical junk average diving fans don't understand anyway -- the scoring could be solely based on how many gallons of water it took to refill the pool after any one guy's plunge. Whoever displaces the most water takes the gold.

Yes, the Olympics are supposed to be about the most highly skilled athletes from around the world getting together to see who's the best. But what would be the harm in throwing in a new wrinkle here or there to make it infinitely more entertaining to the viewers?

Tell me you wouldn't watch that, and I won't believe you. It would probably have the highest TV ratings of any event in the entire Olympiad.

One thing, though. Like any other contest, there would be 3 medal winners.

It might just be a good idea to reinforce the podium they will eventually stand upon.

There's a difference between pikes and whales.