Planes, trains, and hornets?

The good people of Malaysia just can't seem to catch a break. First they lose an airplane, and now they've got a rogue swarm of hornets running amok on the golf course in their Malaysian Open.

Spanish golfer Pablo Larrazabal found this out the hard way on the 14th hole. He had to jump into a lake to escape the pesky buggers when they gang-buzzed him. Pablo said they were huge -- at least 3 times the size of Aunt Bee -- or something like that. He went on to say it was the scariest thing that ever happened to him. Obviously, the poor dear has never been to divorce court, or he'd know what truly terrifying really is.

Something like this would never happen to Tiger Woods. Maybe swarms of bimbos, adoring groupies, and even the above-mentioned horde of divorce lawyers, but hornets? No way. When it comes to being a thorn in the -- insert body part here -- to certain others, this is sometimes referred to as professional courtesy. Even the genus stingus maximus has a code of honor.

Speaking of the Detroit Red Wings, they barely squeaked into the Stanley Cup playoffs only to discover they would be facing the overall #1 seed Boston Bruins in the opening round. Boston was bigger, tougher, more physical, quoth the experts. Even some of Detroit's home-town scribes predicted Boston to win the series in 6 games.

But then something funny happened. The Wings won the opener in Boston. In an extremely boring game (1-0 contests are like that -- see soccer) Red Wing Pavel Datsyuk scored the only goal. Some ranted it was one of the greatest goals of all time. These are the same sort of people that thought the Detroit Pistons would be playoff contenders, and think the Lions are capable of going to the Super Bowl every year. In other words, they remain delirious under the effects of the Motown kool-aid.

Datsyuk indeed made a good play on the puck, reaching back to gather it in while maintaining full stride, but the shot itself was a wrist shot from 20 feet out. Normally a routine save for a goaltender. However, as the bodies were criss-crossing in front of him, the Boston goalie was "screened" at the time of the shot, and never saw it. A good play to start, and a bit of luck at the end, but hardly a classic goal.

Improbably, the Red Wings went 3-1 against the Bruins during the regular season. Now they're 4-1, and have regained home-ice advantage in the playoff series.

Now, after only one game, some scribes that had Boston in 6 have jumped trains. In order to pull that off, the Bruins have to win 4 out of the next 5, including at least two in Detroit. Surprise -- the Motown koolaid is back. Time for them to jump on the winged wheel express. Unless the Bruins win Game 2, of course. If that happens, they will likely go back to their original theory. Sometimes you're right and sometimes you're wrong, but I wish they'd make up their minds and stick to it. This wishy-washy stuff belongs in politics, not playoff predictions.

My prediction? The Pistons will suck again next year, the Tigers will make it to the post-season but not win the World Series, and the Lions? Well, it's the Lions. 'Nuff said.

As for the Bruins and the Wings right now? Not a clue.