Monday, April 20, 2015

Cocky, stupid, and amazing

The Golden State Warrior finished the regular season with the best record in the NBA. As the #1 overall seed they will enjoy home court advantage throughout the playoffs.

They have Stephen Curry, an MVP candidate, Draymond Green as a most-improved player possibility, and Klay Thompson, who can also shoot the lights out from 3 point range. Plus they have a head coach in Steve Kerr who knows a little something about winning himself. He was the "other" guard on the Jordan/Pippen Chicago Bulls teams that had their dynasty back in the 90s.

Though they haven't won squat yet when it matters in the playoffs -- these guys are getting cocky, both on and off the court. Don't look now, but the #8 New Orleans Pelicans have given the Warriors all they want in the first two games by the Bay. While nobody expects a #8 to prevail over a #1 in a series, GS would be well-advised to stop thinking they're "all that" and get back to playing hard-nosed fundamental basketball. Getting cocky has been the downfall of many over the years and running the gauntlet of the Western Conference NBA playoffs won't exactly be a cake-walk. Home court or not, these guys can be beaten, and don't be surprised if it happens along the way.

Sometimes looking beyond stupid reveals -- even more stupid. You've likely seen the commercial. The one with the dopey lady that used to sell insurance policies out of shoeboxes in a sanitarium that is now out and about. See her merrily walking down the street. See a line of delivery vans having fallen in line behind her following her every move. See an equally dopey cop watch the spectacle. What this has to do with insurance is a very good question.

A better question might be -- why the hell is this nitwit walking in the middle of the road when it's plainly visible there are sidewalks on both sides of it? HELLO? And how stupid are the drivers of the vehicles that they ignored their routes to tail and mimic this twit's every move? Worse yet, what happened to the cop? How come he didn't write her a ticket? This is worst case of jay-walking yours truly has ever seen.

While on the subject of stupid, a cable TV channel covering the NBA playoffs has quite the talking head panel to analyze the games they broadcast. A cast that would make the Marx Brothers, Stooges, or even Congress look brilliant by comparison.

Shaq. A 7 foot, 300+ pound behemoth whose most intelligent moments come in the form of goofy smiles and occasional grunts. Perhaps he should stick to those foot powder commercials with the paid models giving him adoring looks. Let's just say his mouth is not an asset.

Kenny. The yappy little guy with the inferiority complex that seems to be on a mission to prove he's relevant in some way. It's not working.

Charles. A one of a kind guy. Thankfully. Charles thinks he's smarter than everybody else. Charles is also likely proud of his golf swing. Charles has never won squat in his whole life but has always been the center of attention. Note to Chuck. Stop with the dumb jokes. If you want to do something entertaining, swat Kenny off his stool.

Ernie. Such a panel wouldn't be complete without a nerdy little white guy in a bow tie serving as a foil. Please.

Long-time NBA ref Joey Crawford is not just still around, but is once again officiating playoff games. You remember Joey. He's the bald headed guy that stiffly lumbers up and down the court like he just came out of a colonoscopy. The all-time loosest cannon amongst NBA refs. The guy that once gave Tim Duncan a technical foul for smiling at him, amongst his other ridiculous moments. Joey was never content to merely call the game -- he wanted to be an entertainer himself. He would have been perfect as a ref for the Harlem Globetrotters games over the years.

But after all his gaffes, goofs, and boneheaded calls over the years as an NBA ref, one could logically ask the question -- what the hell is he still doing out there -- especially in the playoffs?

Amazing.

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