Thursday, March 31, 2011

NCAA hoops. Thoroughbreds, also rans, and KK

AND DOWN THE STRETCH THEY COME!!!!  Well, maybe not the favorites in the men's bracket. The #1 and 2 seeds all seem to have thrown a shoe somewhere along the line. Those hi-falootin colts always were a temperamenal sort and you never know what they'll do next (and no, I'm not talking about Peyton Manning calling audibles). So who's left? Kentucky's a 4 seed but they have a blue-blooded heritage. They even wear the color. UConn's a 3. They have men's basketball too? Geno allows that? Really. There's that pesky Butler, an 8 seed, that everybody thinks will go away, but like another famous butler, they keep lurching around. And VCU as an 11? Plow horses, yet they've tilled the field all the way to the Final Four.

The basketball fillies are usually more predictable. This is when the cream rises to the top, and this year, like most others, the cream was in short supply. UConn, UTenn, Baylor, Stanford, and a couple wannabes. But wait. Baylor and their 6' 8" dominatrix got knocked off by Tex A&M. Good. One trick ponies get exposed eventually. See ya.  Idle thought: If her and Yao Ming got married and had kids -- would they be capable of dunking before they learned their ABC's?

Pat Summitt and her Lady Vols pulled a Humpty Dumpty half way up rocky top. All the queen's horses.....

Stanford, highly respected in the academic community, calls their teams the "Cardinal". Shouldn't there be an "s" on the end of that? They may churn out brilliant scientists and have good teams but this is no place for english majors.

Notre Dame's still there, but they missed the memo a long time ago. They're the Fighting Irish, but the university is named after a cathedral in Paris. Then again, the name Fighting French might draw a few yuks, but I still wouldn't recommend aspiring geography teachers go there. And somebody please inform the boys that, despite what they've been told, Notre Dame translates to "Our Lady", not "The Gipper".

So who's going to win?

On the men's side, methinks the bluegrass boys are for real, but that would go against the mysterious Kathy K's pick, which is Butler. Though I've never met her, I get this very strong feeling it might not be a bad idea to stay on her good side -- in more ways than one -- so the Bulldogs it is. (But if you read this, KK, I'll bet you a Franklin..... oh nevermind. And seeing as how you once blew through New Orleans, I hope your middle name isn't Katrina. Armani, Gucci, or whatever, if you personalize your stuff, those initials might draw a little attention, ya know?)

The ladies? Stanford will take that "s" they don't want and turn A&M into the "saggies". Outta here. The fighting whoever they are? They should have been eating Wheaties. Those Lucky Charms aren't going to cut it against Geno's palominos. And if they ever get their countries straightened out, I don't want to know what a French leprechaun looks like. Please.

In the end, Stanford couldn't keep Harbaugh and they won't keep up in the second half either. It's payback time.

UConn take that to the bank.

PS. Hope you made it to the Palace for Dennis Rodman night. It was April fool's day and Chicago was in town. That meant a lot of bulls---.
Read it either way you want.
Both work.

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