Monday, July 30, 2012

The X rated Olympics

While it might well provide for some very interesting viewing if porn stars were to stage their own version of the Olympics featuring various, ahem, disciplines, an XXX-rated Olympiad probably isn't going to happen any time soon.

We'll have to settle for the current version. Yet it's advertised as the XXX Olympics. Yeah, I know, that means it's the 30th modern version and has nothing to do with the other XXX rating mentioned above.

Still, it doesn't seem right. If it's the 30th, why not just call it that? Seems simple enough. The Daytona 500 recently celebrated their 50th year but they didn't call it the L race. After 100 years of making motorcycles, Harley-Davidson didn't refer to it as C day, although to be fair, if one wants to purchase a new Harley, normally somewhere between CC and CCC C-notes are required. What am I saying? C what-- sorry, see what I mean about getting caught up in this stuff?

When it comes to birthdays, anniversaries, reunions, and the like, nobody ever refers to them in Roman numerals. Ever heard of wishing a child a happy VIII birthday? A husband giving his wife something special to celebrate XXV years of being married? Being invited back to join your former classmates XX years after you graduated? Of course not.

Going back to the Olympics, this raises another question. Why are they referred to with Roman numerals? Most everyone acknowledges the ancient Greeks provided the genesis of the Olympic games. They were also fierce rivals with the Romans back then. So just where and when did it come to be that Roman numerals took over? They did nothing more to deserve that honor than they did to put those same numerals on the likes of grandfather clocks. What's up with that?

They've even taken over numbering the Super Bowls in the NFL. How did that happen? The Romans have never known squat about NFL football, much less ever fielded a team, and they probably couldn't care less. But somehow we've come to accept their ancient numbering system when it comes to the most important football game of the year. Huh?

Ah well, maybe it's just meant to be. But I still think the idea of a truly XXX rated Olympics is interesting. What would we get if they combined porn stars, the balance beam, the rings, the uneven bars, a pole-vaulting pole, a few hurdles, the floor exercise, and put it all to rap music? I don't know either -- but it would be way more interesting than skeet shooting or race-walking.


  1. glad you didnt include equestrian events in your scenario. that might get seriously ugly.

  2. Wow. Never considered that. Pretty sure I don't want to either. Whoever you are, thanks for commenting. It's nice to know I have company in the wacko-world.