Extra, extra, read all about it, the newsboys used to yell back when newspapers would print a special edition for a notable event, before the corporate bean-counters took over. These days, nuclear war likely wouldn't budge them from their daily deadlines. The mushroom clouds can wait until regular business hours tomorrow.
But make no mistake. An earth-shaking event just happened in Dallas. Cowboys' defensive coordinator Rob Ryan was fired, and the Robster appeared absolutely radioactive with the fall-out he was generating.
When I got here, this defense was near the bottom of league, and I made them better, Ryan snorted, while attempting to puff out his plumage like some sort of deranged peacock.
"I won't be out of work for 5 minutes", he sneered.
Well, he was wrong about that. The 5 minutes has come and gone, along with several hours, and it might well turn into several days.
But I have little doubt he'll remain unemployed for very long. There are always people in need of the services he can provide, and would gladly hire him in a heartbeat.
Like the Ringling Bros/Barnum and Bailey travelling circus. The pay might not be so hot, but they're always open to new side-show acts.
If he could only somehow manage to take his twin brother Rex along from the NY Jets, they could become a sensation.
I'd gladly fork over a few bucks to see what they were up to "behind the curtain".