Saturday, February 10, 2018

Goodbye Danica Patrick

And for that matter, good riddance.

Yours truly is hard pressed to think of any individual in the history of sports that was more over-hyped and under performing. Basically, Danica Patrick was a media darling, but a terrible race car driver.

Like Kyle Petty once said (and got torched by the politically correct crowd for), she can go fast but she'll never be an accomplished racer. Truer words were never spoken.

A certain crowd wanted, wanted, wanted Patrick to win races. They NEEDED her to win.

And all along the way, dear Danica was provided with the best equipment and crews. But she couldn't win.

Her only checked flag in the Indy car circuit came in an obscure race in Japan that most of the top teams and drivers didn't even bother to show up for.

It was laughable how biased the broadcasters were when DP was racing at the Indy 500. Typically, when most contending cars would come into pit, for more fuel, adjustments, and new tires, Patrick would stay out for another lap or two.

The announcers would breathlessly scream -- OMG, DANICA PATRICK IS LEADING THE INDIANAPOLIS 500!!!

Indeed she was -- until she had to pit herself and the field reset itself, which would find her far back in the pack.

In all her years of driving in the NASCAR circuit, she never won a single race.

However, she did have the not-so-good distinction of wrecking the most cars. Not only her own, but taking slews of other drivers with her in such pile-ups that she so often caused. The official count is unknown, but it's likely in the hundreds. At roughly $400,000 a pop to build new race cars, this could get pretty expensive for the sponsors that had to pay for them. It's no wonder her sponsor Go Daddy -- went. If you had a daughter that wrecked your car every time you let her drive one, how long would it take you to keep the keys away from her in the future?

I read the Wikipedia account on Danica Patrick, along with a few others. In trying to rationalize how she was involved in so many wrecks, they divided it into two categories.

1) Wrecked unintentionally. This they attributed to bad "racing luck".
2) Wrecked intentionally. Chalk that up to being "targeted".

Yet they omitted the most obvious.

3) Wrecked due to her own incompetence and luck had nothing to do with it.

As for being targeted, the other drivers on the track likely held their collective breaths while the wrecking machine was still among them, lest they be caught up in another one of her $400K a pop gaffes.

Multiply that figure by all the cars she was responsible for taking out one way or the other, and the figure might well be in the billions. What a colossal waste of high tech racing equipment. And all this because the PCers so desperately wanted a woman to be competitive in a sport long dominated by men?

We can remember her foot-stomping hissy fits. We can remember the fawning talking heads and their seemingly mandatory -- and endless -- interviews with Patrick, trying to boost her image. We can remember -- or hopefully forget -- her pitiful attempts at modeling. (If people wanted to see stick girls dressed in leather, they could go to an anorexic biker show).

But wreck, after wreck, after wreck, with no wins to show for it would seem to be her true legacy.

Hence, to no great surprise, Danica finds herself without a major sponsor this year. Of course this is being spun as her planning to retire all along. Please.

Yet ever seeking another 15 minutes, Ms. Patrick somehow plans on racing at the two marquis events this year. The Daytona and Indy 500s.

All I can say is good luck to the other guys and/or gals that find themselves on the same tracks as the one woman demolition derby. Always be aware where she's at lest you become her latest victim.

In sum, this finally, mercifully, appears to spell the end of Danica Patrick's so-called racing career.

And it can't happen a moment too soon.







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