Friday, July 15, 2011

A look at the dark side. What happens if....

Maybe there's too many rules. You name the sport and there's umpteen thousand rules that go along with it. The PGA, NASCAR, NFL, NBA, MLB, NHL, NCAA, and others have libraries full of rules. There's so many rules that sometimes people don't even know they're breaking them. This is out of control.

As an example, pretend you never heard of steroids or other performance enhancing drugs, and ask yourself this-- wasn't it fun watching the likes of Mark McGwire, Sammy Sosa and Barry Bonds club all those home runs at the time?

Maybe we should get rid of the rules. It sure would be a lot cheaper. Chemists are hard at work developing new untraceable drugs, labs look for ways to detect them, the chemists counter with masking agents, the labs re-counter, and on it goes. All of this costs an enormous sum of money. In the end, guess who winds up paying for it? You do.

Let athletes take whatever they want to. Baseball players hitting 100 home runs? Bring it on. Nowhere is the drug snafu more prevalent than the Tour De France, currently underway. I find it boring, but if those guys started peddling UP a steep mountain at 80 MPH, it would certainly get my attention. Maybe then, they could get on a real TV network. As long as they know what they're getting into, I have no problem with that. If their heads explode when they're 40 years old, then hey -- I hope they had a good time for a few years.

Same with football. Too many rules. Let a defensive lineman start helmet-slapping an offensive lineman, like they used to, and the guard or tackle will get his arms and hands up where they should have been anyway. Hence, no more holding calls. Want to eliminate "cheap shots"? Cut the tops off the helmets. It might look weird, but nobody would lead with their head anymore. And what other purpose does it serve, anyway? Nobody lands on top of their head, and it would keep them cooler, too boot.

Hockey? Get rid of the linesmen. For that matter, get rid of the lines. One ref whose only job is to keep track of how many guys are on the ice. Forget the penalties. They'll even out in the long run. Let them use whatever sort of sticks they want. And lose those nets behind the goals that are there to protect fans. If a fan wants to sit there -- and a 90 MPH puck hits them in the mouth -- well -- they should have been paying attention.

The only rules I see in the NBA are the stars get preferential treatment. We can do without that.

While we're at it, how about scrapping all this golf etiquette nonsense? Besides Manny and Floyd, wouldn't you love to see Phil and Tiger throw down just one time and get it over with?

NASCAR? When a couple of those boys have a feud, they use their cars to settle the dispute. That just costs their sponsors a bunch of money to fix the cars. If they want to come across as macho, then they should walk the walk. One word. Octagon.

The NCAA might as well give it up chasing infractions by this coach or violations by that school. Much like a local sheriff might crow about a small drug bust to the press, while the REAL players glance at the news and smirk, the NCAA will trumpet their latest sanctions and penalties on UNameit State. What they don't seem to realize is while they're busy plugging holes in an outdated dam, the tsunami has come and gone, and is regrouping. All those investigators don't work for free either. That filters down to higher ticket prices and concessions. So why should I care if a some rich "boosters" want to give a talented athlete some cash or a car? I don't. It would be a disadvantage to smaller schools? Get real. With a few exceptions, football is the elephant in the room when it comes to college sports' revenue. No matter how good a team might be from a smaller school, they're already locked out of glory anyway. It's called the BCS.

Of course, none of this will ever take place. It would make a lot of bureaucrats and paper pushers go get a real job, and we all know that will never happen.

Thing is -- the rules are making things boring. Let's try it without them for a while. Maybe it works, and maybe it doesn't. One way to find out.

Yet in all honesty, I have to confess I liked the rules that slam-dunked that red-vested weasel in Columbus.

But that was just me..  

No comments:

Post a Comment