I had a dream

No disrespect to the late MLK, but the rest of us have dreams too sometimes. And mine was a doozy.

Millions of sports fans finally rose up and demanded change across the board.

The Major League baseball season? It's way too long. They are not allowed to start until the NBA and NHL playoffs have been concluded, or Memorial day, whichever comes first. Nobody cares about those early games anyway. They're supposed to be the "boys of summer", remember? So act like it. Further, the playoffs and World Series must be concluded before the party stores start stocking up with Halloween candy. Shorten the regular season up to 100 games and instead of 162. That's enough. And get rid of that nonsense about a designated hitter. From T-ball through college pitchers have to take their turns at bat, and those in the National League STILL do. That would throw the records out of whack, you say? Hey, given the steroids era, they're already out of whack.

Same with the NBA and NHL. 82 games is too much. Shorten it up to 40 -- max. And they're not allowed to start until after the Super Bowl is over. The purists aside, few pay attention to basketball and hockey while college and pro football are still going on. The gorilla in the room is alive, well, and getting bigger. All those early hoops and skate games in November and December? Outta here.

But the masses, gaining momentum, demanded even more. Sick, tired, and financially worn out by escalating player salaries, the mob drew the line. No athlete, regardless of how talented he/she may be, shall have a salary of more than $1 million dollars per year. This $8 dollar stale hot dog on a soggy bun and $10 watered down beer stuff has to stop. We can't afford it anymore. Besides, if the athlete is THAT good, on top of the million bucks, they'll likely make plenty more through product endorsements.

Further, those multi-year contracts are history. Nobody can project what an athlete might do NEXT year, let alone 6-8-10 years from now. That's ridiculous. Every jock signs a new contract every year. This has the added benefit of keeping them "hungry". We've all seen the production of many players plummet once they've been guaranteed long-term financial mega-bucks.

The NFL having 4 pre-season games is a farce. In the first 3 games, the starters might play a couple series, and then the scrubs come in. In the fourth game, the starters rarely play at all. This is not acceptable. Cut the pre-season down to 2 games. After all the off-season prior practices and scrimmages, that should be sufficient to determine who's going to stay -- and who's going to go. Enough with this nonsense.

Which means the NFL should lengthen it's regular season to 18 games. 20 would be better. 30 better yet. Let them play twice a week instead of once. It would be brutal on the players, you say? Who cares? It's not like anybody's making them do this, and there will be lots of guys standing in line for a shot to show their stuff.

Which brings me to the disabled list. If a guy's making big bucks for playing a sport, but gets hurt, then of course the team should pay for his medical bills. But they shouldn't have to pay him the same salary they would have if he was still on the field. Call it sick-leave pay. Let's say half. Seems fair enough. All the better to make them work harder in rehab.

Though I could be imagining it, during the course of my dream, I seem to have this faint remembrance of Detroit Tiger manager Jim Leyland strumming a ukulele while running naked through a field of tulips singing something about tip-toeing through his bullpen.

And then I woke up and the sheets were drenched in sweat.

Whew. I'm all for the masses having their way in the world of sports, because they pay for it, but sometimes this can get a little scary.

Maybe I should cut back on the Mountain Dew before I go to bed.