Thursday, August 15, 2013

The Detroit Lions and Shakespeare

Though a die-hard fan for many years, yours truly finally accepted the inevitable with the Detroit Lions. Some things just aren't meant to be. When Barry Sanders walked about 15 years ago -- that was good enough for me. I walked with him. I dare say I've saved a lot of money and aggravation since making that decision.

But once in a while I can't help but take a peek at them on TV. And so I did as they were playing the Cleveland Browns in their second exhibition game. What did I see?

Ndahmukong Suh, the noted stomper of yore, roughing the opposing quarterback long after the ball had been thrown. Tweet. 15 yard penalty.

Newly acquired free agent Reggie Bush got called for a personal foul far away from the play. Tweet, another 15 yards.

Not sure who wears #98 as a defensive lineman for the Lions, but whoever he is doesn't fool around when he jumps offsides. He charged a full 10 yards into the Cleveland backfield before the ball was snapped. Tweet. You can't do that. Another 5 yards. On the very next play, he jumped again, but got back before the ball was snapped.

See Batman QB Matthew Stafford apparently totally lost without his Robin wide-receiver Calvin Johnson. See Matthew throw the ball on a completely botched screen-pass play that should have resulted in a pick-6. Fortunately, the Cleveland defender dropped it.

With merely a few seconds to go in the first half, see Lion's defensive lineman Willie Young get called for holding AND a personal foul -- on a PUNT. There go the flags again. Tweet, tweet.

See the defensive secondary running around like the Keystone Kops trying to figure out who's supposed to be covering who.

See Cleveland -- CLEVELAND -- spanking the Lions 17-3 at halftime. And the score should have been a lot worse.

The second half didn't matter. In an exhibition game, second halves are just the second and third stringers on the field trying to make the team. The final score of the game is irrelevant.

Yep, so much for the latest peek. I'm still convinced I did the right thing all those years ago when I walked with Barry.

From what I saw, it's still the same old clown act. They're not going anywhere this year either, nor likely any year soon.

To be clear, I don't hate the Lions anymore than I hate the leaves that fall from the big tree in my backyard every fall. Like the Lions, the falling of the leaves is just one of those things that happen at a certain time every year.

However, the leaves necessitate a bit of work on my part. And I have to go to the local hardware store and buy a bunch of bags to rake them into. This costs me a few bucks.

Not so with the Lions anymore. I can just ignore them.

It's much cheaper and WAY less aggravation than it used to be.

Better yet, my advice would be -- stop thinking of the Lions as some life and death drama like Romeo and Juliet or MacBeth. They're more like A Comedy of Errors. Fans of Shakespeare have known the difference for hundreds of years.

I wonder why Lions' fans can't seem to figure it out?

Just kick back, appreciate it for what it is, has been, and likely always will be, and have a few yucks.

Try it. You might like it.

Worked for me.

1 comment:

  1. I agree. I was a season ticket holder for over 30 years and finally dumped them after last year. It took me a while longer to figure it out, but enough is enough.