Donald Sterling and the Constitution

Turns out, there's more than one constitution. Many moons ago, yours truly had the pleasure of touring a very old ship named the USS Constitution, which I believe still sits moored in Boston Harbor. It was very cool hearing the narrated history of that frigate, and almost unbelievable when it came to the rigors the sailors of those times had to endure. An arm or leg badly wounded in battle? Step right over here and lay down on this table. The doc will be in to saw it off in a few minutes -- before the days of painkillers, much less anesthesia -- and you'll be alright in a couple of days. Pretty sure I wouldn't have had the constitution for such duty.

Now there's Donald Sterling and a couple other constitutions. One is the NBA version. Evidently, the league and the private club of billionaire NBA owners have their own sacred document. They shall protect, defend, and abide by all the articles, subsections, and amendments contained therein -- or risk the danger of finding themselves accused of high crimes and misdemeanors. In other words -- in a heap of trouble, like Donald Sterling is now. For argument's sake, let's call this the little Constitution, though few seem to know exactly what that Constitution consists of. It's remains a mystery -- a secret -- to the public.

But by thunder, NBA Commissioner Adam Silver, with the help of a more than eager media, have decreed Donald Sterling is in gross violation of their holy book. Sterling should be fined, banned, stripped of ownership, and exiled over his recent personal comments, they claim. After all, Sterling has engaged in "conduct detrimental" to the league, significantly undermined their effort to promote diversity, and even made a "false and misleading" statement to the press. They say.

Looked at objectively, this is all nonsense, of course. The only person Sterling's conduct has been detrimental to is Sterling himself. The league is doing just fine, with their ratings soaring during the playoffs.

Undermined their effort to promote diversity? At last count, the league consisted of players that were 78% black, 17% white, 4% Latino, and 1% Asian. If we can safely assume these players aren't going to walk away from millions of dollars to play basketball and go flip hamburgers somewhere for 8 bucks an hour -- then just where exactly is the problem with diversity? If anything, the whites, Latinos and Asians have a beef when it comes to true diversity.

A "false and misleading" statement to the press? That would likely be the Anderson Cooper interview. It was a trap, and Sterling walked into it. Shame on him for not knowing better, but the interview itself -- while eventually spun to Sterling's detriment -- was fairly innocuous. No "bombshells" were dropped. Just an old guy speaking his mind and, unless I missed something, people still have a right to do just that in this country, supposedly not to their detriment. But that's now how it works anymore -- is it?

So the NBA is getting after Sterling under the "little" constitution. Bring on the tar and feathers.

But the "big" Constitution remains. The one that was crafted by our founding fathers back in the late 1700's.

The other NBA owners may well vote with the 3/4 vote majority needed to banish Sterling from their country club. But that's a mere formality. The real battle will begin in the court system. Lots of high-priced legal-eagles on both sides are likely gearing up for a war that could last for years.

No doubt, the NBA lawyers will be pointing to their own constitution which they found Sterling in violation of.

But Sterling's lawyers will likely drag in that pesky US Constitution and the First Amendment rights guaranteed therein, amongst other things.

Eventually, some day, somewhere, a judge, judges, or even 9 justices will have to decide this thing.

The US Constitution is the Holy Grail in the American jurisprudence system. Ultimately, every legal issue must be in compliance with this historic document. Though courts can issue some screwy rulings sometimes, nobody's screwy enough to declare the US Constitution itself unconstitutional. That would be problematic -- to say the least.

Idle thought: What if Sterling's lawyers prevail with the big Constitution, and get the NBA's little constitution declared unconstitutional? Then what happens with Silver, Sterling, the Clippers, etc?

I dunno. Too much heavy thinking for me. In times like this -- there's only one thing to do. Grab my latest issue of Mad magazine, sit down on the throne and -- of course -- partake of my daily constitution(al).