Tuesday, June 27, 2017

LaVar Bell. Clown act

It's difficult to even know where to begin. A clown? A fool? A shyster? Flat out delusional? Such would seem to be apt descriptions of one LaVar Bell.

First he wanted a billion dollar shoe contract before any of his sons had a single game professionally, They still haven't. The major athletic shoe manufacturers scoffed of course. So LaVar came up with his own brand -- Big Ballers. At the low-low price of only $495, about twice as much as the once ballyhooed Air Jordans ever went for. To date, no word as to who, how, and where a single pair has been made. Imagine that.

The man would seem to have "big balls" indeed with the very way he has acted.

He's made a fool of himself on the usual talk show circuit, shucking, jiving, and talking smack.

Daddy Bell also had the utter gall to say he was a better basketball player than many NBA stars already in the Hall of Fame. This, while he averaged a measly two points in his only season in major college ball.

He thinks his boy Lonzo is already better than the likes of Michael Jordan, Steph Curry, or Lebron James. Last time we saw Lonzo in action at UCLA, he was getting torched by one DeAaron Fox of Kentucky to the tune of 39-10 in the NCAA Elite Eight -- a humiliating loss for the Bruins.

Papa Bell made it clear his boy Lonzo wouldn't even work out for any team but the LA Lakers. It's probably just as well. The Boston Celtics, who once held the #1 draft pick -- likely wouldn't have been the slightest bit interested in him anyway. Who needs a circus like that coming to town?

So the Lakers picked him at #2. Well, OF COURSE they did. If there's been a bigger clown act in the NBA not called the Philadelphia 76ers or Detroit Pistons in recent years -- it's surely the Lakers. They deserve each other.

As if that wasn't enough lunacy, just recently dear LaVar found a way to thrust his presence into the absurdity of professional wrestling. See him charge the ring. See him get up in the face of a man that could snap him like a toothpick if he really wanted to. See the typical mental midgets that shell out big bucks to attend such functions scream with delight. Idiots.

Thing is, one has to wonder about the mental faculties of Lonzo, boy wonder in waiting. It's gotta be tough. I mean, sure, everybody wants to stick by their father. I certainly did, but my dad never went out of his way to become a complete embarrassment to me either. He was a respected executive at General Motors. Yeah, he messed up here and there, we all do, but nothing on the order of LaVar Bell. He does it ON PURPOSE. Or he just doesn't have common sense enough to know better. Either way, it puts Lonzo in a tough spot. Daddy's going to keep hanging on to his coattails and riding them for all they're worth, but at the same time he's trying to prove himself worthy of going to the next level, he has to cope with the farcical circus his old man keeps smothering him with. Even if he's talented enough to cut it in the NBA -- no given -- how can he make a name for himself when his dad keeps sabotaging his "brand" at every turn?

Family loyalty is a good thing, but only to a point. There might just come a time, and that right soon, when Lonzo has to sit LaVar down and have (as Jed Clampett was so fond of saying about Jethro), a LOOOONG talk with that boy, only in reverse.

To wit -- "Hey pop, you've gotta knock this stuff off. You're killing me here before I even get started."

And it would appear -- the sooner the better.

Five hundred bucks for a pair of fancy tennis shoes in the name of a bunch of kids that haven't proven squat yet?

Oh yeah.

That takes big ones indeed.

Or a complete idiot to think anybody with an IQ over that of a potted plant is going to "buy" them -- in more ways than one.

On the other hand, perhaps another career is beckoning LaVar Bell. Given his words and actions of late -- maybe he should run for Congress, or even President. He'd fit right in rather nicely with that bunch.

Just a thought.....

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