Ah yes. Once again, the time has come for baseball fans to emerge from their winter slumber and enjoy the boys of summer as they embark on yet another campaign. In the immortal words of legendary announcer Ernie Harwell, "Hope springs eternal, and a lady named Mary Sue from Keego Harbor snagged that last foul ball" -- or something like that. Hope is everywhere.
Unless maybe you're a fan of the Royals, Indians, Nationals, Orioles, or Padres -- in which case you can forget about that. You don't have any hope. Might as well go back into hibernation and take another peek in, say, a generation or so, because right now you're not looking at lilies, tulips and daffodils reaching up to embrace the warm sun. You've got baseball tundra -- arctic wasteland. Not even a dandelion. But you never know. Miracles have been known to happen, like in....
Detroit, of course, where the ageless Brandon Inge has once again defied the odds and made the team. Yet even hope has it limits. Though Inge has his faithful, if perhaps delusional fans, any of them hoping Inge is going to break out of his career-long slump and suddenly become a productive hitter, let alone post a batting average approaching .300, needs to be treated in a very special way. Like locked in a padded room and heavily medicated. There's no hope for them either, and they might eventually even pose a danger to society if left to run around freely on the streets. We semi-sane people don't need that aggravation, and what is it with this guy anyway? Does he have some compromising videos of Tigers' owner Mike Ilitch or something?
Nevertheless, spring has sprung and hope is always a good thing.
Bet the Detroit Lions' brass hopes their players will stop getting busted with marijuana.