No one would seriously doubt the President Of The United States has awesome powers. As commander-in-chief of all the armed forces, he can order up targeted air strikes and/or missile launches, massive bombings, naval bombardments and/or blockades, quickie in and out special forces stealth operations, and even invade a foreign country with ground troops. Regardless of what others may think about it, all it takes is a couple phone calls. Indeed, in the last half century or so, many a POTUS has done just that.
The POTUS can also grant amnesty, or even full pardons, to any individual or group that has been convicted of wrong-doing, regardless of what their crimes may have been. Right or wrong, it's a phone call and a signature away if he wants it to happen. That's been done too.
And now here comes Ohio State pleading their case to the Prez. It seems the Buckeye faithful are requesting a pardon regarding that whole "tattoo-gate" affair a couple years ago involving their football team. As you may remember, that involved OSU football players trading team memorabilia for tattoos and cash, getting paid quite well for jobs some say they never even showed up at, and a few other perks tossed in by a misguided booster here or there. To boot, it was later discovered the head coach knew about it all along but he, along with the OSU administration, tried to pretend like it never happened. Some would call that a "cover-up". Enter those ever-present pesky media folks. Once they got a whiff of it, the siege was on and they eventually blew the story wide open, as well they should have. Ohio State football got slapped with several penalties, currently the most notable one being they are ineligible for post-season play this year. No bowl game.
Yet a few things seemed to converge this year that yours truly doubts many could have foreseen. After former coach Jim Tressel got the boot, OSU managed to hire Urban Meyer. Meyer is not only well known as a terrific college football coach, but also running spiffy clean programs in the past. Who would have thought he'd be interested in inheriting the mess at OSU? Yeah, there's the money thing, but still....
All the pollsters and pundits fell in line with the NCAA sanctions for the great majority of the year and pretended Ohio State didn't even exist. Surely, even given Urban Meyer, there was no way that program would be relevant in his first year, they tacitly thought. Ignore, ignore, ignore. But guess what? The Buckeyes have so far run the table, with only a home game against arch-rival Michigan standing between them and finishing the "regular" season being undefeated. Last time I looked the people that supposedly know about such things had OSU as a 3.5 point favorite. Let's get real. If UM wins that game, a whole lot of people, especially the NCAA, will breathe a sigh of relief, because OSU is no longer relevant in the big picture, which is what they wanted all along. HOWEVER, if OSU prevails -- things might get a little dicey. Foreseeing that possibility, the above mentioned POTUS has been presented with a petition from the never-say die folks at OSU. It reads as follows:
“The Ohio State University football team is one win away from an undefeated season. However, due to imposed sanctions, they are not allowed to participate in their conference’s championship game or the following bowl season. While a punishment for past indiscretions is to be expected, a bowl season ban is too harsh for a few young men trading memorabilia for tattoos and some change. The offending players and coach who covered it up are no longer part of the program. Please exercise your executive power to pardon the NCAA’s excessive sanctions placed on The Ohio State Buckeyes to enable a rightful, satisfying culmination to the college football season for the American people.”
Make of that what you will, and credit to the Buckeye faithful for their undying loyalty, but c'mon. Like him or not, Obama might be the commander-in-chief with a suitcase of nuclear launch codes never far from him, but yours truly isn't at all sure even HE has the authority to overrule/veto NCAA sanctions. And holy Rush Limbaugh and John Boehner, can you imagine the political fall-out if he attempted to? He's got enough on his plate with the economy, immigration, the doomsday "fiscal cliff" we're all about to tumble over like lemmings, and the Hatfields and McCoys in the Middle East having another one of their little dust-ups. Besides, he's a Chicago boy. He doesn't care anything about Ohio, much less the Buckeyes, now that the electoral votes are in. Bottom line? It ain't gonna happen.
On a related note, I find it comical seeing local "homer" sports reports referring to the Buckeyes as "hairless nuts". While a real buckeye closely resembles a chestnut, their zeal to trash an opposing team over their nickname raises a couple points. I know about peanuts, cashews, pistachios, pecans, walnuts, almonds, hickory nuts, and a few others. But I've never seen hair on any of them yet. So what kind of nuts have those folks that write or talk about such things been eating all along anyway? Whatever they are, if one has to shave them first, I don't want any. Secondly, there's actually real buckeye trees in Ohio. The only real wolverines in Michigan are in a zoo. But they somehow overlook that minor detail too. Sometimes I think the "hairless nuts" might have to do with the reporters themselves. Perhaps in more ways than one, but I don't want to see that either.
Happy Thanksgiving.
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