Sunday, January 24, 2016

What Tom Brady SHOULD say

First, congrats to the Denver Broncos for knocking off the Patriots in the AFC Championship game. No doubt, the media will be swarming around Peyton Manning, and far be it from Archie's boy to shy away from cameras. How many dumb commercial endorsements has he already made and how many times have we groaned when they keep popping up on TV -- over, and over, and freaking-ay over again. Obviously, the man has no shame.

But there will come a time (likely soon) when Tom Brady is forced to take center stage in front of the news hounds. They'll want his take on how and why the Patriots lost the game in Denver.

When that happens, if things go as they have in the past, Brady will likely trot out the usual party lines. The Patriots missed opportunities, didn't execute well in certain situations, and overall they just didn't get the job done.

But if he wants to be open and honest -- here's what Brady SHOULD say ---

[First of all, I stunk. Those interceptions I threw in the first half were inexcusable. After all my years in the league, I'm supposed to know better than to make stupid throws like that.

Second, the offensive line put me in that position. They stunk too. The reason I was trying to make something happen with such awkward throws was because I was under siege for most of the game. The big guys up front that are supposed to protect me became a screen door on a submarine. All I knew was after getting the ball, it was a-thousand one, a-thousand two, and a swarm of orange jerseys in my face. I did the best I could.

Third, the game plan from the coaches was stupid. Even an idiot knew Denver was damn near impossible to rush on, and we were down to our third string running back. So why did coach Bellichick and his merry band of geniuses call any running plays at all? They weren't going to work. Especially with that pitiful O-line trying to block for them.

Fourth, for whatever reason, our usually reliable place kicker missed an extra point early in the game. That changed the whole complexion of everything from then on. How can this guy be so reliable from 40-50 yards on field goal attempts, but miss a gimme like an extra point? If he'd made that, we wouldn't have been forced to go for a two point conversion -- which failed -- to tie the game in its waning seconds. Then we're talking overtime. Anything could happen. But he blew it. I know it, he knows it, the rest of the players know it, and our fans back home DAMN sure know it.

I don't expect the media to ever find fault with somebody these days with whatever happens on the field. Oh no. They remain too busy in their politically correct world coming up with superlatives for anything a player might have got right. Hey, good players are supposed to make good plays. This is nothing special.

But when I, the coaching staff, and the O-line stink it up, chances are we're going to lose against a good team. Throw in a crucial missed extra point -- and there you have it.

And let's get real. If we hadn't been such collective boneheads, losing 4 of our last 6 six regular season games against sub-par competition (the Eagles, Jets, and Dolphins? Really?), we wouldn't have been in Denver at all. They would have had to come to Foxborough -- where we have long owned them.

But it is what it is and we got beat. Denver wasn't all that. We just stunk.]

In the NFC, the high-flying Carolina Panthers obliterated the Arizona Cardinals. No surprise that they won but, dang, who saw a total blow-out like that coming?

Carolina vs Denver in the Super Bowl -- to be played in the San Fran 49ers spanking new fancy stadium in Santa Clara. Let the hype begin. The next two weeks will be chock full of it. Armies of experts, talking heads, analysts, and stats from hell coming at us.

Meanwhile, Tom Brady has to go home to the condolences of his super-model wife, and maybe tally up his countless millions one more time.

Poor devil.

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