Saturday, April 6, 2013

The NCAA finals. Be thankful?

Perhaps it's fitting Louisville and Michigan are the last two men's teams standing. The survivor from the Big East vs the survivor from the Big 10, in all likelihood the two most brutal conferences in the land. It should be a heck of a game.

After the last couple weeks of so much electrifying action, it will almost be a shame to see it all end on Monday night, regardless of who wins. Fans get whipped up into a frenzy, and then WHAM, it's all gone. No more college hoops. What a downer. But there just might be a reason to give thanks.

With a little luck, some of the commercials associated with the games will disappear as well. I don't know about you, but I've just about had it with former Tennessee senator Fred Thompson and Wayne (Trapper John) Rogers hawking "reverse mortgages" to elderly people that own their homes. Call now, and see how much free cash YOU qualify for, they say. What they don't disclose is such companies are slowly purchasing equity in those homes, much like the homeowners did when they originally took out their mortgages. Guess what the end game is?

And I for one am really, I mean REALLY, sick and tired of hearing about Joe Theisman's prostate problems in another ad. That broken lower leg he suffered a while back was definitely bad stuff, but who knew such an injury could eventually reach up into the nether regions and make a person pee like a puppy dog? I hope Kevin Ware, of the Louisville Cardinals, who recently suffered a similar injury, never sees that commercial. He's got enough on his mind already. He doesn't need that sort of aggravation as to what he may be in for in a few years.

How about that guy in a 69 Camaro, with his water temp gauge pegged to the max, pulling over in the middle of nowhere to buy a small bottle of water, drinking half of it, then pouring the remaining few ounces in his radiator -- and everything's just fine. Down the road he goes again. That's not erectile dysfunction. That's mental dysfunction, especially for anybody who watches that commercial and actually believes things could work out that way.

And what sane couple hauls twin bathtubs to lie in at a beach?

ATTENTION!!! If reading this article causes you to experience sudden death, then don't wait. Act now. Call my boss to register your complaint.

See what I mean?

Yep, I'm good with the tournament ending, as long as they get rid of the nitwit commercials at the same time.

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