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This whole bracketology thing is out of control. Over and over and over we'll see or hear so-called "experts" prognosticate on the various possibilities. Enough already. It's not World War III -- it's a basketball tournament. And these clowns don't know who's going to win any more than arm-chair point guards like you and I anyway. That's why they play the games. Good grief -- given the continuous loop droning, even some commercials started to get interesting.

Wow. A burger, fries, large soft drink, and an ice cream sundae for only 5 bucks? When I win my long overdue Pulitzer -- forget Disneyworld. Been there, done that. I'm going to Dairy Queen. That's a helluva deal.

Uh-oh. That pesky Joe Theisman is back talking about his prostate problems again. Well gee, Joe, if you're going to put all that out there to the viewing public while hawking a product for a few bucks, then why not go whole hog? Throw in an HD video of your latest colonoscopy so we can all vomit in unison. Then again, this Super Beta stuff he's advertising appears to be an amazing product. By him merely popping just a few pills a day, not only does Joe get relief, even his wife feels more refreshed and younger. Hey. If one can take some pills and they also rejuvenate your significant other, who is not partaking -- that's some powerful stuff indeed. That has to rank right up there with (I Love) Lucy's "Vita-meata-vegamin" and Larry, Moe and Curly's "Brighto".

And of course, there's the missing jetliner over in Malaysia, or wherever. De plane, de plane. What happened to de plane? For the last 11 days and counting, CNN has been droning on about it seemingly 24/7. News anchors ask the same dumb questions over and over again of even more "experts" as to what could have possibly happened. Yet at the end of every segment -- they always arrive at the same conclusion. Nobody knows. So what's the point? Here's a novel idea. Come back when you DO know something. In the meanwhile, quit wasting the viewers' time with all the clueless chatter. It's enough to make a guy's prostate go into spasms. And then he might wind up having to buy some of Joe's meds. Hmmm. Could a massive prostate pill conspiracy be afoot? And where was Theisman when that plane disappeared anyway? Maybe he's behind all this. Check out his alibi. It makes about as much sense as anything else they've come up with so far.

Dang. Just caught the tail end of another one. Somebody's offering an 800 number for a windows diagnosis. So what's to diagnose? Mine are made of glass, which comes in real handy when one wants to look outside. They'll get my attention when they offer to come over with Windex and paper towels to clean them for maybe 5 bucks. That would be even better than the Dairy Queen special. When the snow finally melts, perhaps I could get them to pick up the sticks in the backyard and clean the gutters as well, for an extra five. Or maybe they were talking about a different kind of windows. Beats me.

I sure wish that basketball tournament would hurry up and start. All this stuff can make you crazy(er) after a while.....