I'd be the first to admit my prognosticating skills aren't exactly top-flight. If I pick em, they're probably going to lose. It's a trait I inherited from my late father. Dear old dad could sure have his "locks", and then watch them crash and burn. It happened every time.
Nonetheless, if Peter King of Sports Illustrated is still considered an "expert" on football winners and losers -- when it's long been obvious he couldn't pick his nose with a power auger -- I shall fearlessly and boldly go where only fools have gone before.
The Cleveland Cavaliers are going down to the Boston Celtics in the NBA Eastern Conference Finals.
Yeah, in Game One, Lebron James had a bad game. A bunch of turnovers, only 15 points, and the Cavs lost by thirteen.
Ah, but the pundits said look out for Game Two. Surely Lebron would, excuse the pun, rebound.
And so he did. Dear LJ racked up a triple-double, pouring in 42 points, and playing stellar defense as well. Teammate Kevin Love chipped in with 20 some points, and the rest of the team appeared to emerge from their recent funk.
And they lost by 13 points -- again.
To a Celtics team severely undermanned with their best two players (Gordon Hayward and Kyrie Irving) out for the season.
That means Cleveland has to win four of the next five games to get past Boston, including two of those being in Beantown -- if it goes that far.
But now the Cavs go back home for Game Three and Four. Can they rally? Maybe.
Game Three will be particularly interesting. You just know the Cavs will play with a collective desperation. All hands on deck, 110% kick-ass mode, and all of that.
Yet the Celts have so far outsmarted and out-hustled the Cavs every which way. Don't be surprised if the trend continues.
The only way Cleveland gets back in this series is with a blow-out win. If it's close, the Beaners will gain even more confidence. And if Boston goes up 3-zip, color it over, and then watch Lebron bail in free agency to parts unknown.
If THAT happens, watch the Cleveland faithful burn his jerseys -- again. Has there ever been a "home-town" athlete that had his jerseys burned in effigy -- twice? Years apart?
That would be breaking new ground, and not in a good way.
No doubt about it, the Cavs better not only defeat the Celts in Game Three, but convincingly.
Else all hell might break loose in the "flake by the lake" -- sometimes known as Cleveland.
I mean, c'mon. The Indians of Major League Baseball, far and away the most talented team in the AL Central, can't seem to get out of their own way. The Browns of the NFL have won one game in the last two years, and recently renewed head coach Hue Jackson's contract? Say what? They lost their NHL Barons team several years ago. And if Lebron James bails -- again -- no telling what the Cleveland masses might do, but it would probably be ugly. Zebra mussels might sprout legs, rise up out of Lake Erie, and take over the whole town. That would be pretty ugly.
Add those all up and it would be just about enough to cause the Pope to go on a jihad. Mother Teresa to self-resurrect and strap on a suicide vest. The Kardashian girls to join a nunnery. Judge Judy to donate her annual $47 million salary -- you read that right -- 47 MILLION to be a shrew as a sham judge -- to charity. And enroll herself in charm school. You know -- REALLY drastic actions.
And for just those reasons, I fervently hope Boston polishes off Cleveland convincingly -- best case scenario a sweep.
Just to see what happens next.
But I picked the Celtics before the series even started.
So something has to go horribly wrong with that.
Dad's watching, I hope, and I wouldn't want to be the black sheep that went against family tradition. As in always getting picks wrong. OMG, heaven forbid any of our clan could actually -- gasp -- pick a winner.
It just wouldn't be fitting somehow.
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