So the Miami Heat won another title. Yuk. I've been to a lot of places in Florida over the years. Jacksonville's the home of Lynard Skynard, my favorite band of all time. The bike week madness in the first week of March in Daytona a dozen or so times. There's the Disney thing outside Orlando, and Silver Springs with their glass-bottom boats. Pretty cool. On the west side, there's the Tampa/St. Pete area and Clearwater. Went "deep sea" fishing on a charter out of Clearwater once, but nobody told me about Dramamine. Wish they had. That was miserable.
Heading south from there, if I remember right, there's a greyhound dog-racing track in Bonita Springs and the ultra high-rent district of Naples. Only blue tick, or is that blueblood hounds there. If one goes further south yet, they'll get into my mom's neighborhood of Fort Myers. Thomas Edison and Henry Ford have their former winter homes side by side in Fort Myers, and it's pretty interesting to visit them. But be careful. If you go a little bit further south to Fort Myers beach, you might run into my mom, and she'll put your butt to work pruning palm trees and make you play 4-5 rounds of putt-putt golf every day. There's a lot of putt-putt courses around Fort Myers, and she knows them all. Trust me.
On the east side, once can head south from Daytona and go through some more pretty cool places -- like my buddy Joe's place on Nettles Island, and then West Palm and Lauderdale. There's some serious boats going on offshore in Lauderdale.
But then comes Miami. What's the best thing about Little Cuba? Watching it disappear in the rear view mirror on the way down to the Keys on US 1. Other than that, I've never seen any redeeming qualities about that town.
On to the NBC idiots. Evidently, some NBC affiliates decided to go to commercial during overtime of the Boston Bruins/Chicago Black Hawks Game 4 of the Stanley Cup Finals . The winning goal was scored just a few seconds later while those nitwits were on the air making a few bucks selling products. When the game came back on -- it was over. Yeah, the NBC folks apologized, but it didn't ring true. They said it was an accident. Horsepucky. In this day and age, technology being what it is -- that was no accident. They tried to sneak one in and got burned. Why not just say it like it is?
For that matter, isn't NBC the same network that is phasing Jay Leno out, while he's dominating the ratings in his late night time slot? Seems to me they tried that once before with Conan O'Brien. He bombed terribly, and they couldn't wait to get Leno back. Next year it's going to be Jimmy Fallon. You'd think the over-all bottom rated network would learn from it's blunders. I guess not. Fallon's currently doing moronic commercials for a credit card company. C'mon Jimmy. You're already making big bucks with your late-late show, and are about to step into the 10-20 million dollar a year neighborhood when you take over Jay's spot next year. Do you really need to be doing this? No other host in the history of Tonight Show would have been caught dead being a shill for a few bucks on the side.
On the NBC local level in Detroit, sportscaster Bernie Smilovitz continues his wacky ways. Over the years, it has become apparent that Smilovitz remains convinced that reporting on sports news should somehow be directly tied to his very own Vaudeville show. It's always about Bernie and his mundane skits that are decidedly not funny. Every time I see that clown say, "Here's a little bit we call (insert upcoming groan of the day), I always think, "Yeah, well here's a little bit I call click, Bernie. You're outta here". What is it with that guy, anyway? Doesn't he realize Marx Brothers type humor went out of style a few decades ago and is no longer knee-slapping hilarious? At that, what kind of self-respecting comedian laughs at their own jokes?
Of course, Smilovitz will always find a way to get some celebrity or jock on camera to ask what's going on with a "weekend at Bernie's?" Often times, it's probably safe to say those people have never met Smilovitz, have no idea who he is, and sometimes don't even get his name right. Yet somehow they get put up to asking the question.
Spending a weekend at Bernie's? If I was limited to such a choice, I'd rather spent a weekend with the Taliban in the mountains of Afghanistan. At least I'd probably be put out of my misery quickly rather than being slowly tortured to death with dumb jokes and video clips that might, repeat MIGHT be amusing to your average 2nd grader.
So OK. End of rant. I had a bad day for a few reasons, and I vented here. I feel much better now and can get back to my usual routine of peaceful, tranquil settings.
A spot of tea -- only Earl Grey will suffice -- while busying myself ever so gently massaging the oriental lily bulbs that are about to spring forth with their magnificence in the flower gardens. Perhaps the daintiest of crumpets or a poached egg when hunger calls. Yours truly must remain mindful of his boyish figure. I could even buy some cracked corn and go back to my "secret spot" to feed the duckies while once again spending hours poring over Renaissance era art work, with all it's intricacies and, what a connoisseur, such as myself, can derive from the works of the old masters.
Either that, or it's back to kick-ass hockey between the Bruins and the Hawks.
Hmm. Decisions, decisions.
pretty good reading j
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