Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Random rants

For decades Roger Penske has been a dyed in the wool Chevy man. So what's he doing running Fords in NASCAR these days?

Now they think they have yet another lead on the long lost Jimmy Hoffa. It's been almost 40 years since he was presumed dead. A flurry of quicky questions..... Even if they find his remains -- what then? Exhume his skeleton just to rebury it somewhere else? They'll still never know who killed him. And even if they found out -- those people are dead too -- of old age. So what's the point in wasting all the man hours and money looking for him? Don't they have better things to do with our tax dollars? Like fixing a few pot holes or something?

As much as I'm rooting for the Blackhawks in the Stanley Cup finals, mostly cuz I like their uniforms, I think the Boston Bruins have got on a roll and are just too good right now. When Chicago had an extra man on the ice due to penalties -- Boston was STILL carrying the play with better scoring chances. Sorry Deb. I fear there will be no joy in the Obamahood when it's all over. He might have got his former right hand man Rahm elected mayor, but even the mighty Prez won't be able to bring Lord Stanley's cup to Chitown. The Beaners are stifling them like Archie used to do to Edith.

Starting pitcher Max Scherzer of the Detroit Tigers just improved to 10-0 on the season. He's racked up 116 strikeouts, posts a 3.08 ERA, and opposing batters are hitting a measly .189 against him.

In the meantime, superstud and Cy Young award winner Justin Verlander is only 8-4, has chalked up fifteen fewer strikeouts (101), posts a 3.41 ERA, and the other guys are batting .253 against him.

So tell me one more time who the ace of the Tigers' staff is this year.

Verlander got a breakfast cereal (Fastball Flakes) named for him. I wonder what might be in store for Scherzer in the endorsement department if he keeps this up. His own brand of kielbasa?

Weird story. My hot water heater starting leaking out of the bottom. So I called a plumber buddy of mine that's a pro at such things. He came over, put his hands on it and said a few magic words -- and incredibly, the damn thing stopped leaking. Dry as a popcorn fart. Yeah, I know, it was only a temporary fix, but still.......  I think the Detroit Lions could use a guy like this. If he can stop hot water heaters from leaking with a few words, who's to say he couldn't get them to win a playoff game if they were to tap into his magic as well?

Nah. Next thing ya know, they'd be back into delusional mode and ranting about going to the Super Bowl again.

There's sort of miracles and then there's real miracles. I dare say hot water heaters are a far cry from the Lombardi trophy. Despite his magic touch, and as smart as he is -- even my buddy couldn't pull that one off.

I think....

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