It's old news that former Lions' head coach Jim Schwartz got fired a while back. Certainly, he appeared to have it coming. After all, during the 5 years of his leadership the Lions not only amassed a woeful 29-52 record, but finished out the 2013 season in yet another death spiral -- losing 7 of their last 8 games. Further, after those 5 years, it appeared both the Lions players, and Schwartz himself, had yet to learn even the very basics of professional discipline. Despite the occasional tease of good play -- just enough to keep their fans hooked -- at their core the Lions were basically an overrated bad clown act spinning out of control. Schwartz had definitely proven himself to be a loser and had to go.
But now the tricky part. Who will the Lions hire as their next head coach? And does it really matter anyway? I'll get back to that.
Names have been bandied about. Former Houston Texans coach Gary Kubiak was one of them. He got fired a month ago when the Texans were a pitiful 2-11, and he has a 61-64 career coaching record.
During 3 seasons as head coach of the Tennessee Titans, head coach Mike Munchak went 22-26. Not good enough. He was canned at the end of the year.
Former Arizona Cardinals head coach Ken Whisenhunt is often mentioned. During his 6 years (2007-2012) running the team in Arizona, he went 45-51. Again, not good enough. He got shown the exit door as well. During this last season, Whisenhunt has been the offensive coordinator for the San Diego Chargers, who remain in the playoffs. There are those that think somehow, magically, he is now attractive again as a head coach. How quickly they forget his record when he actually had such a job.
There are other head coaches that bit the dust at the end of the 2013 season. What do they all have in common? They weren't good enough. Losers.
Ah, but the Lions, in their, ahem, cough, infinite wisdom, want their new head coach to have former head coaching experience. And there's the rub. The only thing they have to pick from in that regard is a coaching pool of guys that got fired from other teams for being losers. Hey, the NFL isn't like college, where a winning coach can be lured away by another team for bigger bucks and more exposure. In the NFL, owners have a way of retaining winning coaches. Something about bazillion dollar contract extensions. So the Lions have a choice. Either hire a former loser, or try somebody new.
And let's face it. During their entire history, the Lions organization is where head coaches go to die. Yes, Detroit offers a very elegant hospice with all the amenities -- but terminal is still terminal. No head coach of the Detroit Lions has ever -- EVER -- gone on to be an NFL head coach elsewhere.
That's why yours truly laughs when I see people saying the Lions job is such a prime destination. Sure it is. Even if the next head coach never won a single game, he'd likely be guaranteed $20-25 million bucks from the Ford family before he got fired in a few years like all his predecessors. Is it any wonder so many people have shown interest in such a job? If your time draws short -- might as well live out the few remaining years with a few boatloads of money.
Thing is -- even if the Lions could wave their magic wand and create a head coach combining the upsides of the likes of Lombardi/Walsh/Shula/Belachick, etc., they'd still inherit the same team. And that self-overrated bunch is nowhere near being contenders.
Taking a hard look at the Lions roster -- next time. It is what it is -- and it ain't pretty.......
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