Whether or not Marie Antoinette ever actually uttered those words remains in dispute to this day. But like most NFL head coaches, the lovely Ms. M certainly lived high on the hog for a while. Vast fortunes and luxuries far beyond the wildest imagination of the peasants/fans were bestowed upon them. A stable of servants/assistant coaches was at their beckon call.
That is, right up until they fell into major disfavor with the masses/owners. In 1793, just shy of her 38th birthday, she found herself in the unenviable position of having a mandatory date with a guillotine. Let's just say things didn't work out so well for Marie in the end.
Which brings me to modern day NFL head coaches. It appears a few more heads will roll after the regular season is concluded next week. Some are almost no-brainers, no pun intended.
Jim Schwartz of the Detroit Lions can color himself gone. Whack. Even an ownership that would once take 8 years to finally figure out giving a demolition derby driver like Matt Millen the keys to their limo was a bad idea would certainly be able to see the obvious these days. Wouldn't they?
As can Leslie Frazier of the Minnesota Vikings. Whack. Fittingly enough, the teams of Jimbo and Les will meet on the final day of the regular season in a meaningless game. Perhaps they will console each other knowing they share a common fate.
Mike Shanahan of the Washington Redskins and Tom Coughlin of the NY Giants will also meet in the regular season finale. This presents a more interesting scenario. Unlike Schwartz and Frazier, both Shanahan and Coughlin have two Super Bowl wins on their resumes. Yet Shanny currently finds himself at odds with his eccentric owner, and Tom's boys seem to be coughing like a cat with a hair ball the size of Rhode Island in their throats. Bottom line? Both teams have stunk it up big time this year. As the long departed Ms. Antoinette once found out -- the NFL is all about what have you done for me lately? Prediction? Neither of these guys survive to see 2014. Whack, whack.
Jason Garrett of the Dallas Cowboys was very close to being given his last rites. Rumors coming out of Big D (and when AREN'T there rumors about America's Team/Jerry Jones' personal rodeo) have it that many on the football staff thought they would all be fired if the Cowboys didn't make the playoffs this year. They may well have been right.
Then a couple unpredictable things happened. The Cowboys squeaked out a last second win in DC. Good for Garrett. Not so good for Shanahan. But Cowboys' starting QB Tony Romo sustained a back injury that puts him out indefinitely. Next Sunday, Da Boys host the Philadelphia Eagles. The winner goes to the playoffs. The loser is eliminated. Thing is, Philly's been on a roll. New head coach Chip Kelly's team seems to be getting better every week. Witness their total demolition of the Bears just a couple days ago. And QB Nick Foles is the real deal. Don't believe that? Since taking over for Michael Vick, the dude's thrown 25 TD passes and only 2 picks -- by far the best ratio in the NFL. And whens the last time you heard Vick's name even mentioned?
Anything can happen, but chances are good Philly's going to waltz into Big D and hogtie the Cowboys. They likely would have done so even WITH Romo healthy. Without him, the Cowboys chances take a major turn for the worse.
Bottom line? Though the apologists are already out in force trying to give Garrett a built-in alibi if the Cowboys don't make the playoffs -- yours truly suspects King Jerry will not be amused, much less persuaded. Whack.
There are others. Consider Mike Smith of the Atlanta Falcons. In the last few years the Falcons have posted very impressive regular season records. But for some reason, they never got far in the playoffs. This year they took a total nose dive. Owner Arthur Blank is routinely seen on the sidelines closely watching his team. Might King Arthur look down his considerable nose and deem Smitty as no longer worthy of running his football fiefdom? A possible whack.
Here's what I think I know. Not long after the regular season concludes next week in the NFL this year -- the guillotine is going to be quite busy.
So let the heads roll. Other people will step up to take their chances at brief fame, fortune, and glory, only to inevitably suffer the same fate. And time marches on.
Personally, yours truly was never much of a cake fan anyway.
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